In Erich Fromm’s 1956 classic, The Art of Loving, he provides unique insights into the subject of faith.
Fromm did not believe faith is in opposition to reason or rational thinking. On the contrary, he simply made a distinction between rational faith and irrational faith. He believed that irrational faith is based on submission to irrational authority. But rational faith is based on one’s own convictions.
It’s a serious mistake to allow yourself to get caught up in the “what-if” and “how-to” trap before taking action. The reality is that no one can ever hope to know all the problems in advance, let alone all the solutions. (more…)
Just about everyone claims to be in favor of freedom. But few seem to agree on what it means.
One person’s idea of freedom can actually violate another person’s freedom. To one person, it means doing what he wants with his own life. To another, it means doing what he wants with other people’s lives. Both say that the other one’s concept of freedom is tyranny. (more…)
David Carradine. Ed McMahon. Farrah Fawcett. Michael Jackson. Billy Mays. Karl Malden. Steve McNair. The Grim Reaper is on a roll.
What might the deaths of these high-profile people have in common with the likes of Gary Hart, Gary Condit, Jim McGreevey, Mark Sanford, and John Edwards, among others?
Or how about Lyndon Johnson, Spiro Agnew, and Richard Nixon?
Or G. Gordon Liddy, Oliver North, Mark Fuhrman, Wayne (Dog) Chapman, and Don King?
Answer: Things change!
We do not live in a static universe. Nor do people or situations remain at a standstill on our little speck of cosmic dust. Mountains erode. Riverbeds dry up. Technology moves forward. The economy fluctuates. Even laws change.
Who could have predicted that the celebrities I listed in the first paragraph of this article would all be gone within a one-month period? (more…)
What a tragedy that Farrah Fawcett not only is suffering from terminal cancer, but that her 24-year-old son, Redmond O’Neal, was arrested for allegedly trying to smuggle drugs into a jail to give to a friend. (How comforting it must be to know that your son has buddies in the slammer.)
Then there’s Sarah Palin’s daughter, who got pregnant by an 18-year-old punk who not only backed out of marrying her, but decided it would be real classy to go on national television and tell tales about the Palin family.
These stories of celebrities’ kids screwing up go on nonstop. And they remind all but the luckiest of parents that one of the not-so-fun aspects of having children is that they all too often don’t take into consideration how the results of their actions might impact their families.
Which brings me to my 20-year-old son. A few months ago, he was in an automobile accident and nearly totaled both his car and that of the other driver. It was nighttime, and the black car in front of him had run out of gas and come to a stop in the right-hand lane. The driver said he had his emergency lights on, but my son – perhaps due to a momentary lack of concentration – thought the car was moving.
In any event, he looked over his left shoulder to make sure he could switch lanes, and, as he looked forward again, the right front of his car slammed into the left rear of the immobilized black car in front of him. Though my son was going under the 40-mile-per-hour speed limit, the impact was great enough to trigger his airbag and spin his car around several times.
Of course, you’re always at fault when you hit a car from behind. However, considering the circumstances (black car… nighttime… the other car out of gas and stopped in the road… and my son driving under the speed limit), it didn’t seem necessary for the police officer to charge him with reckless driving. But that’s what he did.
A reckless driving conviction can bring a very stiff fine, the suspension of one’s driver’s license, and, in extreme cases, jail time. But, thankfully, no one was injured. And the other driver was a sympathetic gentleman who was just happy that his wife and small daughter were okay. He even called our house later that evening to see how my son was doing.
As with all negative occurrences in life, a lot of good came out of this one. During a recent conversation I had with my son, he told me that he couldn’t believe how much he had learned from the experience.
When I asked him to elaborate, the first thing he said was that it made him realize how easy it is to have a serious automobile accident. He emphasized how much more careful and alert he intended to be in the future.
He also said he had never imagined how involved being in an accident could be – dealing with insurance companies, finding an auto-repair shop, coming up with the $500 deductible for his share of the $10,000 repair bill, finding an attorney and coming up with the money to pay his fee, going to the DMV to get a copy of his driving record for the attorney, making two court appearances, and, above all, the stress of waiting for both his first and second court dates.
Best of all from my perspective is that he said it made him realize what a major effect his actions could have on others – especially his family. Kids normally learn this simple truth the hard way, over a long period of time. But we adults have no excuse. We should already know that virtually everything we do impacts others, particularly those closest to us.
Which is all the more reason why we should think doubly hard about the consequences of our actions ahead of time. As I told my son, it’s a heck of a lot easier to avoid a serious mistake than to repair the damage caused by one.
In my article “Learning from Saddam,” I said that it’s a good idea to learn to “look backward from the future.” By that I meant that you should make it a habit to picture the possible consequences of your actions before acting. There’s not a person reading (or writing) this article whose family wouldn’t be better off had he/she always applied that rule.
Of course, your perception of reality is a critical factor in all this. If you delude yourself about the odds and the possible consequences of your actions, looking backward from the future is an exercise in futility.
But having an accurate perception of reality is another subject for another day. Right now, a good start is just to think about the efficacy of the “looking backward from the future” principle – and start teaching it to your young children.
What if your children are already in their teens or early twenties, you ask? Answer: Good luck.
[Ed. Note: To learn how to survive and prosper during the turbulent years ahead, check out Robert Ringer's powerful audio series Succeeding in a World of Chaos. And be sure to sign up for a FREE subscription to his one-of-a-kind e-letter A Voice of Sanity in an Insane World.]
A reader recently sent me an e-mail in which he griped about his “impossible situation.” I guess it’s all in the eye of the beholder, because to me it appeared that his was an impossible situation with a lot of possibilities.
So what, exactly, is an “impossible situation”? More specifically, what does “impossible” really mean? Is it impossible to make a mountain move simply by having faith? That’s quite a challenge. If anyone could do it, it would probably be that Star Wars guy, Yoda. But I don’t know of any real person who’s mastered such extraordinary mind power.
Is it impossible to get the man or woman of your dreams to love you if he/she is already in love with – and maybe married to – someone else? (Shades of Dudley Moore in the classic 1979 movie 10.) Not quite like moving a mountain, but perhaps a close second.
Terminal cancer? The subject of miraculous healing is a surefire invitation to a heated debate. Many of us have known people who were told they had terminal cancer, yet survived and lived to enjoy many more healthy years. Have all of those cases been flukes?
All of which raises the question: When the seemingly impossible happens, is it God, luck, coincidence, or something else that is responsible?
God can presumably do anything, but God also helps those who “help themselves” – meaning those who take action.
As for luck – well, that’s pretty much random.
Sometimes we witness the impossible and refer to it as a coincidence. But I’m not sure there is such a thing as coincidence. Most of the coincidences I’ve experienced have been a result of actions previously taken.
Which leads me to the “something else” – that great metaphysical abstraction we refer to as human will.
The will to accomplish something – be it winning a sporting event or moving a mountain – manifests itself in something we call attitude.
Viktor Frankl was perhaps the most famous of all Holocaust survivors. He lost his mother, father, brother, and wife in Nazi concentration camps. Years later, he wrote: “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
Okay, so Frankl had an amazing attitude under seemingly impossible circumstances. But wasn’t he lucky as well? Absolutely. I’m sure Frankl would have been the first to admit that he was a very lucky man, but he also was convinced that he could not have survived Auschwitz and Dachau had he not chosen to find positive meaning in his life.
Let’s consider the three possibilities you would have had if, like Viktor Frankl in the 1940s, you found yourself in a Nazi concentration camp.
Possibility No. 1: If you had a great attitude concerning the dire straits you were in, you still may not have survived without a good deal of luck.
Possibility No. 2: If you harbored an attitude of total despair, you surely would have been doomed, even if you had been fairly lucky.
Possibility No. 3: But if you had a positive attitude coupled with good luck, you would have had a shot at surviving. This, I believe, is what Frankl was getting at when he said that choosing one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances is the last of the human freedoms.
In all likelihood, then, the impossible dream is not impossible at all, at least theoretically. In my lifetime, I have been in far too many impossible situations that mysteriously became possible.
Meeting my wife was impossible. (Too long of a story to go into here.) My son coming into this world rather than dying at birth, as he almost certainly should have, was impossible.
For that matter, when I get up every morning and behold my little speck of the universe, it occurs to me that both the universe and my consciousness are complete impossibilities. Surely I am the most improbable collection of atoms in existence.
Whatever it is that arranged my atoms in such a way that I can reflect on my own existence, does it not seem reasonable that the same Whatever can make a brain tumor disappear? Or bring the perfect spouse into the loneliest of lives? Or cure a person with financial leprosy and guide him to great wealth?
I believe the answer is yes. And for me, that Whatever is the Eternal Energy of the universe.
Luck and coincidence are interesting abstractions, but a more meaningful abstraction is human will – the will to have power, the will to have money, the will to live. When you exercise your freedom to tap into the Eternal Energy of the universe, your life is not at the mercy of luck or coincidences. And though we may not understand it, it is that connection that allows us to go beyond dreaming the impossible dream – and actually live it.
[Ed. Note: To learn how to survive and prosper during the turbulent years ahead, check out Robert Ringer's powerful audio series Succeeding in a World of Chaos. And be sure to sign up for a FREE subscription to his one-of-a-kind e-letter A Voice of Sanity in an Insane World.]
Here’s an excerpt from a book I’m reading that you should pay close attention to:
“This brief company history may leave the impression that our experience has been one of ever-improving results, with one success after another, each building on the one before. Nothing could be further from the truth. Progress, whether in business, an economy, or science, comes through experimentation and failure. Given that a market economy is an experimental discovery process, business failures are inevitable and any attempt to eliminate them only insures overall failure. The key is to recognize when we are experimenting and limit the bet accordingly.”
Now let me tell you why you should think long and hard about the above words: They were written by a man who has built his business into the largest and most profitable privately held company in America. Koch Industries, which most people have never even heard of, has annual revenues of $90 billion – greater than those of Microsoft and Bank of America!
I suppose I was one of those people who assumed that a giant such as Koch Industries had experienced nothing but success, with each success “building on the one before.” After all, how many failures can you possibly have on your way to building a company with $90 billion in revenues?
Answer: Plenty. In his book The Science of Success, Charles Kochdescribes one misstep after another that he and his team have made over the past 40 years, mistakes that cost his company tens of millions of dollars. But mistakes and losses are part and parcel of the free-market, entrepreneurial model upon which Koch Industries has been built.
This entrepreneurial model requires Koch Industries to go into each new venture as an experiment. If the experiment seems to be working, the company increases its bet as it goes along. If it isn’t working, it cuts its losses and moves on.
Translation: Failure is not a bad thing. Failure is a good thing, so long as it doesn’t become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Failure is, in fact, the Supreme Teacher, and action is the matriculation fee that allows you to enroll in the Supreme Teacher’s class.
Michael Masterson calls this the principle of accelerated failure. “To develop any complex skill,” he says, “you must be willing to make mistakes and endure failures. The faster you can make those mistakes and suffer those failures, the quicker you will master the skill.”
He goes on to say that you should be “happy and even eager to try and fail until you finally succeed.”
That reminds me of something basketball great Michael Jordan once said: “I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed.”
Most people harbor such a fear of failure that they can’t bring themselves to supply the action needed to participate in the class. There can be many reasons for this fear, and one that I believe plays a more prominent role than most people might suspect is the stigma attached to failure.Society tends to treat failure with disdain, and most people fear being frowned upon by the straight-and-narrow types who make up the bulk of the populace.
I doubt that one in a hundred people believes that “business failures are inevitable and any attempt to eliminate them only insures overall failure.” But these are not the words of a Harvard Business School professor. They were written by a 40-year veteran of the Entrepreneurial Wars who sits at the top of the food chain.
Charles Koch is not telling us that we might fail. He’s telling us that we must fail. And that if we try to eliminate failure, we are guaranteed to experience overall failure – as in long-term failure. In other words, the only way to totally eliminate failure is to do nothing, which, paradoxically, guarantees a failed life.
The next time you feel a fear of failure coming over you, remember the words of Charles Koch and don’t allow the potential stigma of failure to intimidate you. When Charles Koch talks, wise people listen. I mean, how wrong can a guy worth $14 billion be?
[Ed. Note: To learn how to survive and prosper during the turbulent years ahead, check out Robert Ringer's powerful audio series Succeeding in a World of Chaos.
And be sure to sign up for a FREE subscription to Robert Ringer's one-of-a-kind e-letter A Voice of Sanity in an Insane World.] ]
The foundation for handling sadness and misfortune, and thus for leading a low-stress life, is what I like to refer to as “living right.” What I mean by that is consistently being conscious of, and vigilant about, trying to make good choices.
We all desire love, understanding, and recognition, but those things aren’t foundational to serenity. The antidote to stress can’t be found through alcohol, pills, sexual pleasure, fame, or wealth either. Millions have tried without conquering their stress, and all too many have lived unnecessarily short lives as a result.
The real key to conquering stress is self-examination – continual, honest self-examination.
Inner conflict causes stress. By contrast, leading a concentric life (i.e., one in which what you do matches up closely with what you believe in and what you say) brings harmony into your world. Harmony is directly related to how often you follow through and do what you know is right. Likewise, harmony is related to how often you demonstrate the self-discipline to refrain from doing that which you know is wrong.
Here are some things to think about that will help you develop the mindset to overcome the stress in your life:
Don’t try to make the world bend to your will.
Trying to get everyone to do things your way goes beyond stress. It’s a frustrating, hopeless exercise that can drive a person mad. I know one wealthy individual, in particular, who long ago lost his ability to think rationally because of his frustration over not being able to force everyone around him to conform to his wishes.
One of the rules of being a good delegator is to tell people precisely what you want them to do, then let them do it their way. President Dwight D. Eisenhower once said that a good executive is someone who, when handed a letter that he knows he could have written better, signs it anyway.
This is an area where you have to be careful, even when dealing with your own children. While it’s the parents’ responsibility to teach and guide their children, wise parents learn early on that their children cannot and will not do everything exactly as their parents want them to. The reality is that your children are different human beings than you are, so it would be unnatural for them to mirror you 100 percent of the time.
Recognize that for every negative, there’s an offsetting positive.
I often refer to a principle that I call the Natural Law of Balance. In pointing out that the universe is in balance, I use such examples as electrons and protons, night and day, male and female, hot and cold, and life and death. The reality is that for every positive, there’s an offsetting negative, and for every negative, there’s an offsetting positive. Balance is the natural order of the universe.
The nice thing about it is that when you understand and believe in universal balance, you automatically look for the offsetting positive in every negative situation. Put another way, think of every negative occurrence as nothing more than an illusion hiding something of value to you. As Richard Bach so eloquently put it in his book Illusions,“What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls a butterfly.”
Control anger and bitterness.
It’s worth repeating Ralph Waldo Emerson’s famous words: “For every minute you are angry, you lose 60 seconds of happiness.” The late Jim Blanchard was a great teacher for me in this respect. Jim was one of the most remarkable people I’ve ever known. A paraplegic from the age of 18, he not only built a fortune while working from a wheelchair, he traveled the world extensively and did almost everything “normal” people do – and more.
Jim once told me about a guy who had shafted him out of a lot of money. I asked how he could be so calm about it, and I’ll never forget his response: “I’ve found that it’s disarming to just smile, be polite, and act as though nothing is wrong. Not only do you avoid making enemies by handling things in this manner, you also save yourself a ton of aggravation. All you need to do is avoid having business dealings with that person in the future. And to the extent you are cordial, he’ll probably even sing your praises to everyone – which means you win all the way around.”
I admit that Jim was special when it came to handling people, but his words help me to this day. Whenever I become angry, I give myself time to cool off before saying or doing something I might later regret. For example, if I impulsively write a quick letter in a heated state of mind, I let it sit for a day or two before mailing it. It’s amazing how much of the angry edge you can take off a letter by editing it a couple of days after you wrote it.
One last thing worth thinking about when it comes to achieving peace of mind. In his book Ageless Body, Timeless Mind, Deepak Chopra says that worrying about stress is more damaging than stress itself. Which brings me back to something I said in my last ETR article on this subject: It is not events that shape your world. It is your thought processes.
When you learn to control your thoughts, you establish the boundaries of negative influences upon your life. Remember, no matter how long a list of stress inhibitors you compile, your mental state will always be the most important factor when it comes to achieving peace of mind.
[Ed. Note: To learn how to survive and prosper during the turbulent years ahead, check out Robert Ringer's powerful audio series Succeeding in a World of Chaos.
And be sure to sign up for a FREE subscription to Robert Ringer's one-of-a-kind e-letter A Voice of Sanity in an Insane World. ]
As you can see from the examples above – all of them posted on various websites – although the Internet has become the most popular source of information these days, it’s full of wrong information. Sometimes it’s an innocent retelling of myth. In other cases, the people behind it are out to spread malicious lies to further their agendas.
In either case, you must check your sources before you rush to include anything that comes up in a Google search in your next e-zine article, term paper, or blog.
To guard against republishing fiction as fact, ask yourself: ”What sources of information are guiding my actions? Have I checked the facts, or am I simply relying on the word of others? Above all, have I applied common sense to this situation, or am I acting impulsively?”
Lazy thinking leads to the acceptance of fiction as fact. Our modern world is so saturated with fiction transformed into fact through the phenomenon of gradualism (where a lie is repeated so many times it gradually gains currency) that even the most alert and rational among us can be fooled. This is just one reason why the search for truth is a lifetime
[Ed. Note: To learn how to survive and prosper during the turbulent years ahead, check out Robert Ringer's powerful audio series Succeeding in a World of Chaos.
And be sure to sign up for a FREE subscription to his one-of-a-kind e-letter A Voice of Sanity in an Insane World.]
For the great thinkers of the world whose job it is to make sense out of life – from Plato to Will Durant… from Epictetus to the Dalai Lama… from Montaigne to Eric Hoffer – the foundational rules never change. The universal principles of human nature are constants. And in a world of chaos and madness, that’s nice to know.
All of this came to mind yet again when I recently read a book written nearly a hundred years ago. The book, The Human Machine by Arnold Bennett, admittedly is not written in a reader-friendly style. But Bennett’s approach to understanding why people tend to look outside themselves – to others or to “uncontrollable” circumstances – for the source of their problems is quite clever.
By the “Human Machine,” Bennett was referring to the part of a person that consists of brain and muscle.
Researchers of late have been frantically trying to show that abstracts such as the ego and the soul are nothing more than physical aspects of the brain. Their objective is to move the ego and soul out from under the umbrella of metaphysics and fit them neatly into the Human Machine.
The brain intellectualizes, conceptualizes, and gives orders to the muscles. It has the power to override instincts. But the brain and the ego are not the same thing. Bennett believed that “your brain is the servant of the ego” - i.e., that you have the power to control your thoughts.
It was of great interest to me that a hundred years ago Arnold Bennett was addressing many of the same issues I have been writing about over the past three decades – for example, reality versus the perception of reality.
Bennett cautioned readers not to base their actions “on the workings of an ideal universe,” and instead to “base them on this universe.” In my book Looking Out for #1, I discussed this point at length under the moniker of the “Is’s versus Ought-to’s Theory,” which states: The degree of complications in a person’s life corresponds to the degree to which he dwells on the way he thinks the world ought to be rather than the way it really is.
In other words, reality is what it is, and it’s up to us to discover it. Our perception of reality may or may not have any connection to reality itself.While all this may sound obvious, each and every one of us is guilty, at one time or another, of confusing reality with the perception of reality.
We often go to great lengths to convince ourselves of our innocence. But the truth of the matter is that, in the vast majority of cases, our bad outcomes can be traced to our own actions – or lack of action.
Those who don’t get this become unconscious participants in the Blame Game, in which they blame events, conditions, or other individuals for their bad results. It’s a dangerous game to play, because it can become an excuse for failure.
What I’m talking about here is a psychological delusion known as transference. When you insist that something is not your fault, what you are unwittingly saying is that you cannot change your situation because you have no control over it.
The most common targets of transference are the droves of dreadful people who continually cross our paths – the liars, the self-righteous, the rude, the petty, and, worst of all, the hypocrites. After all, aren’t they at fault for any friction that interferes with the way our Human Machines perform?
The answer is no! We would like those people to be at fault, but they are not. They merely provide us with an excuse for the bad results of our own faulty judgment.
Even when you suffer as a result of someone else’s bad behavior, you do yourself no favor by blaming your pain on that person. There is a difference between engaging in transference (blame) and trying to analyze the reason you incurred the problem.
There is always a reason for a bad consequence, but a reason is far different from an excuse. An excuse is nothing but a clever way to escape accountability. The fact that someone was dishonest with you could be a legitimate reason why you were harmed, but it is not a valid excuse for abusing your own Machine.
What I mean by this is that if you allow someone else’s malfunctioning Machine to “bug” you, if you focus on retribution against the owner of that malfunctioning Machine, you – not he – create an enormous amount of friction in your Machine. Why? Because you are the master of your thoughts, and it is your thoughts that either abuse your Machine or keep it operating smoothly.
The reason you are the master of your thoughts is because they are formulated in your mind, and no one can enter your mind and wreak havoc without your permission. Which means that no human being can force you to be upset… to complain… to be angry. Anger is a debilitating mindset, because it separates a person from his common sense and dignity. When anger is out of control, anarchy reigns in your head.
But even when we’re not angry with someone else, we often cause friction in our own Machines by making the mistake of trying to control others. Bennett gave excellent advice regarding this mistake when he pointed out that we are not in charge of the universe; we are in charge of ourselves.
Remember this the next time you think about meddling in someone else’s Machine. Learn to leave things alone that are none of your business. As Bennett put it, the art of peaceful living lies in “keeping the peace, the whole peace, and nothing but the peace with those in your life.”
A good motto to live by is that when there is friction in your Human Machine, the fault always lies within. When all is said and done, the only thing you can really control is your own mind. Which is no small task. Work at becoming adept at it, and you will be amazed by how smoothly your Machine functions.
[Ed. Note: To learn how to survive and prosper during the turbulent years ahead, check out Robert Ringer's powerful audio series Succeeding in a World of Chaos.
And be sure to sign up for a FREE subscription to Robert Ringer's one-of-a-kind e-letter A Voice of Sanity in an Insane World.]
If you haven’t yet seen Valkyrie, the Tom Cruise film about the best-known of the 15 or so plots to kill Adolf Hitler, I highly recommend that you purchase or rent the DVD.
One of the reasons filmmakers come up short when attempting to recreate true stories on celluloid is that they seem to believe subtlety is a virtue, which can make it difficult to follow the plot. I had no problem on that score with Valkyrie, but only because I had seen The History Channel’s recent documentary Valkyrie: The Plot to Kill Hitler.
What I especially liked about the documentary was the part that began where the film left off. After Col. Claus Graf Schenk von Stauffenberg (Tom Cruise) and his co-conspirators were captured and executed, The History Channel went on to discuss their posthumous evolution from traitors to heroes in thought-provoking detail.
Hitler, in his best propagandist mode, referred to the Valkyrie plotters as “a tiny clique of criminally stupid officers.” His denunciations were heard loud and clear throughout Germany. And if there’s one thing we know about human beings, most of them, sadly, tend to believe whatever those in power tell them.
Thus, for many years after their executions, the conspirators were viewed by the general public as traitors. However, as Germany settled into becoming a civilized society, it slowly came to grips with the monstrous crimes Hitler and the Nazis had committed. As a result, public sentiment about the plot shifted dramatically, and the men involved in it were increasingly viewed as heroes.
It’s too bad the movie left all this out, because there are several major messages here. First and foremost, whether one is a traitor (or “terrorist”) or a patriot (or hero) is very much determined by time and circumstances. Hitler had nearly a year to ingrain in the minds of his subjects the belief that von Stauffenberg and his cohorts were traitors of the worst kind.
So, to me, the most inspiring part of the Valkyrie story is that, in the end, truth prevailed. Hitler was reviled by the masses, and those who tried to overthrow him were (and are) looked upon as patriots and heroes.
Perhaps the Valkyrie conspirators were well versed in the life of Socrates. To the bitter end, Socrates never retracted his unpopular statements. And to the bitter end, the Valkyrie heroes never wavered in their determination to put an end to Hitler’s madness.
On a personal level, the Valkyrie story is yet another reminder that it’s much more important to be loyal to your principles than to be popular. Truth and popularity, in fact, are all too often at odds with one another.
In comparing his own life to that of Socrates, in his book The Consolations of Philosophy, Alain de Botton wrote:
“In conversations, my priority was to be liked, rather than to speak the truth. A desire to please led me to laugh at modest jokes like a parent on the opening night of a school play. With strangers, I adopted the servile manner of a concierge greeting wealthy clients in a hotel – salival enthusiasm born of a morbid, indiscriminate desire for affection. I did not publicly doubt ideas to which the majority was committed. I sought the approval of figures of authority and after encounters with them, worried at length whether they had thought me acceptable. When passing through customs or driving alongside police cars, I harboured a confused wish for the uniformed officials to think well of me.”
Sound familiar? It should. Because, to some extent, every one of us is guilty of not having the courage to reveal our true thoughts. In fact, none of us will ever totally rid ourselves of the sometimes overpowering need to be accepted. It is a psychic disability that is part of being human.
This is so even though we know, in our heart of hearts, that some of the biggest fools on the planet are popular. If we need reinforcement on this point, we need only turn on our television sets and listen to the babble of the many high-profile fools who grace our screens.
But what about compromise? Doesn’t a civilized society require compromise? For the most part, compromising on “details and strategy” can be beneficial if it helps equals to get past trivial issues. But when it comes to principles, Ayn Rand had it right: How do you compromise between good and evil? Between moral and immoral? Between freedom and slavery?
Which brings me back, once again, to the Valkyrie story. It reminded me just how important it is not to compromise one’s principles. Like everyone, I’ve had my share of people getting mad at me for something I’ve said (You should read some of my subscriber e-mails!), something I’ve done, or for refusing to do something they wanted me to do.
If this, too, sounds familiar, I’d like to pass along some advice from a centimillionaire friend who died about 25 years ago, one of the wisest men I’ve ever known. About a year before he passed away, he told me that when people become angry with you for your words or actions, and you know you’ve done nothing wrong, the solution is to look in the mirror and say to yourself: “If my hands are clean and my cause is just and my demands are reasonable, I have nothing to worry about.” Then simply go about your business.
Finally, I would remind you to keep things in perspective. Unless it involves the government, sticking to your principles with Socratic stubbornness is unlikely to result in your execution. Of course, in certain instances, it could cost you financially. But even then, the tradeoff is that your self-respect and self-esteem will skyrocket.
And those are things you can’t put a price tag on.
[Ed. Note: For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's bestselling dealmaking audio series.
And be sure to sign up for his Voice of Sanity e-letter.]
I recently let my guard down and let my wife talk me into making one of my rare visits to a nearby shopping mall – one of my least favorite places.
The place was mobbed, as though people were determined to have one last go at the good life, perhaps sensing that shopping malls might soon be turned into homeless shelters. I watched with great interest as people stood in long lines to pay for the on-sale merchandise they clutched tightly in their arms.
Strolling through Foot Locker, I examined a number of tags to see where the goods had been manufactured. No Honduras or Sri Lanka here. No sir. Virtually everything I looked at was made in none other than Cambodia.
My mind became an instant time machine. It hasn’t been that long ago that Richard Nixon was explaining that the reason he secretly bombed Cambodia was to “end the Vietnam War sooner.” Hmm. As I recall, that didn’t work out too well.
It also hasn’t been that long ago that Pol Pot’s Khmer Rouge slaughtered 2 million of their own countrymen, leaving their skulls neatly stored on rows of shelves in warehouses. Cambodians have always been fastidious about such matters, you know. Just one of those unfortunate things that seem to happen when communist revolutions are carried out in the name of “the people.”
But all is well, because the Khmer Rouge are long gone and Foot Locker has found a great new labor force to satisfy Americans with big appetites for material things and too little cash to pay for them. Now, however, even cheap Cambodian products have to be put on sale in order to entice cash-strapped shoppers to buy.
What I thought about mostly, though, as the mob threatened to swallow me alive, was the contrast between the salivating materialism at the mall and a show that Dateline did on foreclosures a while back. The show was grim, to say the least.
The Dateline documentary featured a lot of people who were lamenting that they hadn’t read the fine print in their loan agreements when they bought their houses. Many, of course, couldn’t afford their houses even at the original interest rates they paid. But many more found themselves in trouble when the adjustable-rate time bombs built into their mortgages exploded.
Dateline didn’t leave anything to the imagination – sheriffs serving eviction notices on visibly shaken people, movers putting furniture and personal belongings out on front lawns (where their owners had 24 hours to take them away), tears streaming down people’s cheeks as they bemoaned the sobering reality that they had no place to go.
One young man, with his daughter’s arm around his shoulders, sat on his front step and, with tears in his eyes, kept repeating, “I’m a loser.” You’d have to be pretty hardhearted for that not to grip you. Having been homeless myself at one time in my life, I could relate. I know what it feels like to have nowhere to sleep.
So I have a message for that young man: Even though I don’t know you, the odds are that you are not a loser. You’re just a person who’s made some bad decisions. And now, like me and everyone else who has made bad decisions, you’re experiencing the consequences of your actions.
But that shouldn’t stop you from learning from this experience and profiting from it in the future. In the words of Robert Kiyosaki, author of Rich Dad, Poor Dad (who was once so broke that he and his wife had to sleep in their car), “Winners are not afraid of losing. But losers are. Failure is part of the process of success. People who avoid failure also avoid success.”
The day I started paying closer attention to the news was the day I started realizing that I wasn’t uniquely stupid in making many bad decisions.
• How smart were the wealthy people who invested in Bernard Madoff’s Ponzi scheme?
• How smart were the top brass at the Big Three automakers?
• How smart were Barney Frank & Friends for pushing Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac into making sub-prime loans to people who couldn’t afford any kind of loan?
• How smart were the corporate boards of Citigroup, Wachovia, Goldman Sachs, Bear Stearns, Lehman Brothers, et al. that were not able to continue without handouts from taxpayers?
If you’ve lost your home, your business, and/or your money, don’t be intimidated. The guys running many of the biggest corporations in the world have managed to lose billions, which makes them many times dumber than you.
Sure, the deck is stacked against you, because you don’t have billions to work with and you don’t qualify for a taxpayer bailout. But the way I look at it, the deck is stacked against everyone – because no matter what we do, we aren’t getting out of here alive anyway. In the words of British economist John Maynard Keynes: “In the long run, we’re all dead.”
With the economy in shambles, now is the perfect time to get all this squared away in your mind. Get up off the floor and listen: You’re not dumb, and you’re not a loser. You just haven’t learned to be as clever as the guys who make super-dumb decisions and still walk away with millions.
Regardless of where you are today, I can tell you where you will be next year at this time: exactly where you should be according to how resilient you are over the next 12 months, how determined you are, how hard you work, and how good your decisions are.
Just be sure to keep in mind Robert Kiyosaki’s warning that people who avoid failure also avoid success. Above all, remember that there’s a lot more to success than bean counting. If you have love and good health, you’re already successful.
A loser is someone who quits. If you never quit, you never lose.
[Ed. Note: You may have made mistakes. You may have failed. But that doesn't mean you can't live the life you always hoped for. Learn how ETR can help make your dreams come true right here.
For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's bestselling dealmaking audio series.
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We witness misery every day on our television screens – but when John Travolta’s son died this past January, it affected me in a special way. I connected to that great photograph of the two of them, nose to nose. You could see how much he loved the boy.
It was just another reminder of one of life’s harshest realities: No one, no matter how rich or famous, escapes the tragedies inherent in human existence. The only thing different about tragedy in the life of a high-profile person is that it feels close to home to the rest of us. That’s because, in a vicarious way, we feel like we know that individual on a personal level.
An even bigger reality that the Travolta tragedy brought home to me is how we go along so merrily in life – especially when we are prosperous and healthy – not really thinking about the inevitable bad stuff just over the horizon. And to a great extent, it’s a good thing that we have the capacity to ignore the inevitable sadness that looms ahead, lest we be perpetually depressed.
In his book Consolations of Philosophy, Alain de Bottonsays:
“Though the terrain of frustration may be vast – from a stubbed toe to an untimely death – at the heart of every frustration lies a basic structure: the collision of a wish with an unyielding reality.
“The collisions begin in earliest infancy, with the discovery that the sources of our satisfaction lie beyond our control and that the world does not reliably conform to our desires.”
An understatement, to be sure. Even if you are the embodiment of a positive mental attitude, a harsh reality will, from time to time and without warning, collide with your desires and best-laid plans. Where a positive attitude comes in is not so much in believing that nothing bad will ever happen, but in helping us handle the bad things when they occur.
Later in the book, Botton quotes Seneca as saying:
“We never anticipate evils before they actually arrive. … So many funerals pass our doors, yet we never dwell on death. So many deaths are untimely, yet we make plans for our own infants: how they will don the toga, serve in the army, and succeed to their father’s property.”
When I was in the seventh grade, I came to school one day and noticed that the chair behind me, where Walter Graves sat, was empty. When class began, our teacher said to us, “I’m sorry to tell you that Walter Graves passed away yesterday.”
I knew Walter only well enough to say hello. He seemed like a nice enough kid – quiet and a bit shy. Then, one day – just like that – he was gone. It was my first introduction to mortality. The boy who sat right behind me died! No further explanation was given to the class.
Finally, Botton says:
“There is a dangerous innocence in the expectation of a future formed on the basis of probability. Any accident to which a human has been subject, however rare, however distant in time, is a possibility we must ready ourselves for.”
Those of us who are members of that most solemn of all clubs – the one that reverses the natural chronological order of things – can relate all too well to this. Losing a child is something that cannot be fully understood by an outsider. Members of the Reversal of Nature Club are painfully familiar with the “dangerous innocence in having an expectation of a future formed on the basis of probability.”
Now, my youngest son has reached the age of 20 – the age of immortality. Do you remember when you were 20? I do. I never for a moment allowed reality to interfere with the way I lived my life. Walter Graves was but a distant memory when I was 20. I threw caution to the winds and enjoyed my immortality. The people in the funeral processions that passed my door were just actors on my personal stage of life.
Last week, my 20-year-old son’s immortality had a brush with reality. He nearly totaled his car. Luckily, no one was seriously injured. The fallout, however – an upcoming court date to face a reckless driving charge, a $500 deductible to pay on a $10,000 repair job, a probable monthly increase of $100 or more on his car insurance – has been enormous.
And those things pale in comparison to the stress all this has caused him and his fearful thoughts about how, but for the grace of God, someone could have been killed. Not to mention two months of being without a car. (Longer if his license is suspended.)
Funny how life works. One of the most beneficial experiences a young person can have is to be in a serious automobile accident in which all parties escape uninjured. I thought about that when my son kept telling me how much he had learned as a result of his accident. We shall see.
As for the Travoltas and the rest of us who have become unwitting members of the Reversal of Nature Club, we are humbled by the reality that no one escapes the tragedies of life, that there is such a thing as the inevitable, and that, no matter how positive we may be, we are powerless to alter certain events.
Having said this, we are free to choose how we prepare for, and react to, such events. And when all is said and done, no one can teach us how to excel at that. It is one of life’s great challenges in a world filled with more tragedy and uncertainty than ever before in human history – a challenge worthy of considerable time and effort on our part.
On reflection, perhaps the best way to deal with the inevitability of tragedy and sadness is to think of life as a game – and, as Robert DeRopp put it in his book The Master Game, to seek a game worth playing. Having found the game, play it with intensity. Play as if your life and sanity depend upon it… because they do.
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Success – in all areas of life – loves speed.
Time is your ally when you take action. But time is a two-sided coin. If you hesitate or procrastinate, time becomes your worst enemy. As a general rule, I assume that if I take action perceived problems will tend to disappear – and that the more I hesitate, the more time I give new obstacles to come on the scene.
I don’t recall ever succeeding at something because I got there last.
In the Preface to Stephen M.R. Covey’s book The Speed of Trust, his father, Stephen R. Covey (of Seven Habits fame), states: “My interactions with business leaders around the world have made it increasingly evident that ’speed to market’ is now the ultimate competitive weapon.”
Just think about that for a minute. The ultimate competitive weapon. What a remarkable idea.
In The Speed of Trust, Covey takes a giant step beyond his father’s statement. He not only tells the reader what the greatest catalyst for speed is (trust), he explains how and why it produces speed.
Covey says that where there is a lack of trust, everything takes longer and costs more. And he’s absolutely right. Isn’t it a lot faster and less expensive if you trust someone enough to make a deal on a handshake rather than having to bring in a brigade of problem-finding, fee-building attorneys to cross the t’s and dot the i’s?
On a macro level, the greatest threat to America is not Islamic terrorists. Our greatest threat is loss of virtues – and at the top of the list of decaying virtues is trust. Americans don’t trust religious leaders, they don’t trust schools, they don’t trust corporate chieftains, and, above all, they don’t trust politicians. (I should add that all this distrust has been well earned.)
Covey points out that trust is based on a demonstration of both character (most commonly manifested as honesty) and competence (most commonly manifested in results). It’s possible to trust someone’s honesty but not trust him to deliver results – just as it’s possible to trust someone to deliver results but not trust his honesty. Either way, dealing with such people will slow you down.
I never cease to be amazed by people who repeatedly make adamant promises yet consistently fail to follow through on them. I’ve grown weary of listening to those who always speak in the future tense, saying that they’re going to take care of this or that tomorrow. As one tomorrow rolls into another, my trust in these folks declines at an accelerating pace.
At a minimum, I prefer to hear the present tense – a person telling me that he’s in the process of doing something. Even better is the past tense: “Yes, I’ve done it.” The past tense promotes trust. Words like “Not yet, but…” arouse doubt.
As for demonstrating character, Covey emphasizes that it’s not so much how people act in the presence of others, it’s what they do behind the scenes. (Anyone who doesn’t understand why this is so probably isn’t curable.) But if they have a hidden agenda, a shrewd person will see it right through the facade they’re hiding behind. You don’t even have to know them to detect the truth.
Do you have a hidden agenda? If so, either trash it or bring it out in the open. If you want to be trusted, you have to play every card face up. Strive for consistency between what you say and do behind closed doors and how you present yourself in public. You simply can’t afford the cost of not doing that.
Finally, there’s that tired cliche about “a level playing field.” I am convinced that nothing does more to level the twenty-first century playing field than trust. Because in today’s world, it’s speed, not size, that carries the day. Trust pays off in high speed and low costs, which gives David the best chance he’s had against Goliath since he aimed a slingshot at him.
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Some time ago, I received an e-mail from one of my readers, John P., about a close call he had while driving when he was 17 years old. Here’s part of what he had to say:
“There was no time to think, only to react. And there was no fear at all, until afterward. It’s like I knew exactly what to do (pull over to the opposite side of the road to avoid the oncoming headlights).
“Remembering back, it was as if I were playing a video game, avoiding a head-on crash. But for the next day or two I was shaking in fear, thinking ‘What if?’ I still think ‘What if?’ and I still have some residual fear.
“Thirty years later, I have a safe driving record, even while driving motorcycles for 20 of those years. (No longer now.) Maybe the one close call at an early age taught me to be careful.
“I believe in free will. And part of me believes I survived that close call because I had strongly chosen to stay alive and healthy. Just as, at other times in my life, I have hurt myself (physically or emotionally), choosing to do so on a subconscious level in order to gain the insight or knowledge that pain teaches.”
The reason John P.’s words caught my attention is because I had an almost identical experience when I was in my early twenties. It was dusk, and I was driving north on a two-lane highway in Kentucky, not far from the Ohio border.
At a distance – perhaps a quarter-mile or so – it appeared that a car was coming toward me on my side of the road. I thought it might just be an optical illusion. Still, I continued to watch the oncoming vehicle with great intensity, just to be sure.
As the distance between us rapidly closed, it became clear to me that the car definitely was on my side of the road – and headed straight at me. I instinctively glanced to the side to see if there was room to swerve off the road. Like something out of a nightmare, all I saw was a narrow strip of shoulder alongside a Kentucky-style drop-off from a cliff.
All of that took no more than a second. When I looked up, the speeding vehicle was getting so close that I could see that the driver’s right arm was flung across the top of the front seat and his head was lying sideways on top of it. He was either asleep or dead!
I frantically leaned on the horn until he was perhaps within 20 yards of me. In a millisecond, I had to decide whether to swerve to the other side of the road and chance hitting another car head on, or swerve to the right just enough to get out of the oncoming car’s path – and hope I wouldn’t go over the edge.
I guess by instinct, I chose the latter. Miraculously, I managed to keep from going over the cliff as the car whizzed by me. I looked through my rearview mirror and witnessed the most horrific sight of my young life. The car that had almost killed me slammed into the car that had been directly behind me.
It was like watching two toy cars collide. To this day, I not only can see the crash in my mind, I can hear the sounds of metal and glass bending, breaking, and flying through the air.
I got out of my car and ran to the scene of the crash. An elderly man and woman were stone dead in the front seat, covered with blood, heads thrown back over the top of their seats like mannequins.
I was shaking all over as I ran to a nearby farmhouse and yelled to some people on the front porch to call the highway patrol. The rest is kind of a blank, but I do recall that the driver of the other car was alive, and that a patrolman told me he was very drunk. He also said that, ironically, drunk drivers often survive deadly crashes such as this because their bodies are so relaxed.
After giving a statement to the officer, I drove the rest of the evening at a snail’s pace. I had developed instant paranoia about another car crossing over to my side of the road.
A year or two later, I was asked to fill out a form for the prosecutor in the county where the accident occurred, explaining in detail what had happened on that fateful night. I assume I helped put the perpetrator of that horrible crime in jail.
Since that time, I have been an advocate of stricter penalties for drunk drivers. To me, it is ludicrous that being drunk is considered to be a “mitigating circumstance.” If it were up to me, a drunk driver who kills someone would go to prison for life.
In my view, making the decision to drink and drive is as bad as premeditated murder, because it often ends with the death of others. And life-ending decisions should have life-ending consequences.
Drinking was no excuse for that driver in Kentucky to take the lives of two elderly folks. I thought a lot about how I would have felt had the victims been my mom and dad, and wondered who their children might be – and how devastated they must have been when they got the news.
So here I am, decades later, alive and well. Since that evening, I’ve cheated death on a number of other occasions – including a crash in a Learjet that totaled the plane. Part of me believes that in every case I was the beneficiary of divine intervention. But I cannot answer the atheist’s question of why God didn’t save that (presumably) innocent older couple driving just behind me.
In case you’re wondering, yes – I have often pondered why mine was the car in front rather than the car behind. I’ve even wondered if there was some way I could have maneuvered my car to bump that oncoming vehicle off course. I guess no matter how smart or successful we are, in the end, life is a series of unanswered questions.
How about you? Have you had one or more experiences in your life that could have – should have – killed you? And if so, to what do you attribute your survival? Predestination? Luck? Divine intervention? Or, like John P., your will to survive? Let us know right here.
[Ed. Note: It's a difficult truth, but anything could happen at any moment. That's why you need to live life to its fullest, every day. If you have unaccomplished goals or un-reached-for dreams, there's no better time than now to achieve them. Get started - and get plenty of motivation, every step of the way - right here.
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While it seems like a simple enough proposition, the fact is that choice can be a very complicated subject. I think most people believe “You are a victim of your own choices.” They have shared story after story about how they made bad choices that led to their downfall, as well as good choices that led to great success – often in the face of enormous obstacles.
I agree that where we are at any given point in our lives is primarily the result of the choices we’ve made. But I’m not as hard line on the issue as you might expect. For example, if a person does not have the mental capacity – or emotional makeup – to make good choices, it is virtually certain he will make a lot of bad ones. This is the plight of the so-called “special needs” child.
I’ve taken some heat from hard-core conservatives and libertarians for saying that Seung-Hui Cho, who murdered 32 fellow students and teachers at Virginia Tech in April 2007, was a victim as well as the perpetrator of a heinous crime. No one has the wisdom, let alone the moral authority, to decide who is, and is not, mentally capable of making good choices.
Another interesting way of looking at choice was sent in by one of my readers who said: “I would assert that none of us ever has free will or choice. Choice is an illusion – an illusion that ego is ever so proud of.” He went on to explain that extensive studies have shown that the brain is “already in the process of executing all actions and thoughts one full second before the action takes place, and a half a second before the action/process is noticed by attention/consciousness.”
In other words, the ego/mind notices something that’s already happening and, while it is happening or sometime afterward, says, “I did that!” or “I chose for that to happen” or “I willed that to happen.” But, my reader pointed out, since “the action had already started and would continue even if it never made it into consciousness/attention/ego/mind,” that makes us nothing more than stimulus-response machines.
So, it all comes down to the same old question: Does man really possess free will – the power to choose? Or is our every thought just a result of the way our brains evolved? Was the “thought” in my mind to type these words already set in motion 14 billion years ago, as well as the thought to even ask the question? Is my belief that I am, of my own free will, sharing all this with you just an illusion?
Gosh, I hope not. For if we are nothing more than organic automatons, life has no meaning. If we do not have free will, we are but actors on a cosmic stage, playing out our parts exactly as we were programmed to do. Which would make for rather dull theater.
And that makes the Dalai Lama no better or no worse than Adolf Hitler. One of them was simply programmed to be a good toy, the other a bad toy. In fact, aside from criminal defense attorneys and politicians, you’d have to give everyone a free pass for their “bad” actions. Which is why, though I believe in free will, humility compels me to admit that I don’t understand it.
Why not just make everyone good? Why give anyone the power to make bad choices?
Regardless, to one extent or another, most people do believe in free will. Which means they believe in some degree of self-determination, a concept with two divergent groups of adherents – humanists and “spiritualists.”
To oversimplify it, a humanist believes that man is totally at the controls and that science, in effect, invalidates God. From an intellectual viewpoint, the problem I have with this is that while man continues, at an accelerating pace, to figure out how things work, it seems clear that he will never be able to answer the “why” question. Why does gravity work the way it does? Why do atoms combine to form certain specific molecules? Why is math the language of the universe?
I am what I would call a “straddler.” I believe in self-determination brought about by connecting with a “Universal Power Source.” But, at the same time, I believe that many things are not within man’s control. Yet, there are two important questions this viewpoint does not answer:
First, why do certain events seem to be predestined and out of our control? And, second, which events really are out of our control? We pretty much know that macro events such as earthquakes, typhoons, and collisions between objects in the cosmos fall into this category, but what about events in our day-to-day lives?
And what about the age-old question: Why do bad things happen to good people? I’ve listened to many people do mental cartwheels in an effort to glide around this one, but my own answer is as straightforward and honest as I can make it: I simply don’t know.
The subject of fatalism versus self-determination constitutes far more than just a fascinating philosophical discussion. It gets at the very heart of making good choices. If you believe in fatalism, there is no reason to even try to make good choices. On the contrary, it gives you a good excuse to embrace the most extreme form of narcissism. This, I believe, is the underlying, perhaps subconscious, mindset of the John Edwards Genre.
But if you are among the millions who believe that some things are predetermined while others are not, my advice is that you not spend a great deal of time worrying about which things fall into which category. It makes a lot more sense to make a conscious effort to make good choices at all times. This doesn’t guarantee that you will always succeed in making good choices – but if you don’t even make the effort, it does guarantee that you will rarely make them.
And what if our choices really are nothing more than illusions? What if we really are nothing more than stimulus-response machines? Not much you can do about that except enjoy the illusion that you have free will, and keep on imagining that you’re making good choices… just in case, somewhere down the road, you should discover that you do have the power to control your own destiny.
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Since his sentencing in December, I’ve thought long and hard before chiming in on the latest O.J. saga. Given that everyone is now pretty much in agreement on the character of this psychopathic primate, I’m not interested in getting in a few “me too” jabs.
Nevertheless, as I watched O.J. near tears in court, the word karma came quickly to mind – as it probably did with you. Not only because of the way his life has turned out, but also considering the lives of so many of the other actors in the 14-year run of this modern-day Greek tragedy.
About a year-and-a-half ago, I wrote a two-part article titled “Karma and Compound Interest,” in which I pondered the possibility that the late Johnny Cochran, who died of a brain tumor in 2005, might have been a victim of his own karma.
I took a lot of heat for that, but I wasn’t passing judgment on him. I was merely thinking out loud. When I asked, “Was Cochran’s gruesome death compounded interest that came due on his karma debt?” I just wanted to give readers some food for thought.
As we can all vividly recall, Cochran brilliantly transformed the O.J. Simpson trial into the trial of Mark Fuhrman. And for years, Cochran insisted that he believed O.J. was innocent. I never bought it. Cochran was smart, and he had to know that he was responsible for setting a vicious double-murderer free.
As they led O.J. out of the courtroom this time around, I also thought about Robert Kardashian, Simpson’s former friend who is best known as the guy seen carrying a garment bag from Simpson’s home the day after the murders. He then signed on to the Simpson legal team, apparently just to be able to claim attorney-client privilege regarding the matter. Kardashian died in 2003 of cancer of the esophagus at age 59. Karma? Who knows?
And how about “good karma”? Think of the many people who became famous and built careers as a result of the O.J. case. Mark Fuhrman became a respected contributor to Fox News. Marcia Clark is the legal correspondent for Entertainment Tonight and The Insider, and she made big bucks on her book Without a Doubt. Most amazing of all, Greta Van Susteren became a superstar! (Hmm… after sticking up for O.J. on CNN every night throughout the trial? Go figure.)
Then there’s Kato Kaelin who is… well, he’s still just Kato Kaelin, still searching for his sixteenth minute of fame. And if he doesn’t find it, I guess he’ll have to be satisfied with going down in history as the world’s most famous houseguest. Some karma.
As I said in my previous two-part article on this subject, “Everything that goes around comes around” is a nice, tight, philosophical view of life that is very comforting – until we come up against two scenarios that don’t fit:
Since I’ve already written about the above two possibilities, I won’t go into them again here. But I will add another one that the most current O.J. trial brought to mind: What about people who get away with dishonest or criminal behavior and don’t get caught? I’m talking about a sort of lesser version of “When good things happen to bad people.”
Why do scoundrels like Joran Van Der Sloot, among others who have been in the news, seem to be able to escape the consequences of their actions? I think this question not only baffles most people, it frustrates them.
But I don’t let it bother me, and I’ll tell you why. When you believe someone has gotten away with something, you are assuming that you know how things will turn out for them in the long term. But you don’t. After years of seeming to get away with murder (some figuratively, some literally), universal law finally caught up with such moral giants as Drew Peterson, John Edwards, Eliot Spitzer, Rod Blagojevich, Charles Rangel – and let’s not forget O.J.
And even if O.J.’s conviction were to get overturned on appeal, you still don’t know what the future holds for him. Plus, no one knows what his life has really been like all these years behind those TV shots of him yukking it up on the golf course. The fact is that the life of the world’s most insatiable social animal has been reduced to that of a leper for the past 14 years.
One last thing that crossed my mind as I watched the latest act in the O.J. drama play out on TV: What do all of these people have in common? Answer: Arrogance. No, incredible arrogance.
John Edwards ran for president while his wife was terminally ill and he was fathering a child with another woman. Governor Blagojevich openly invited bribes for Obama’s Illinois senate seat, even though he knew he was under criminal investigation. Eliot Spitzer enjoyed numerous encounters with prostitutes after spending years criminally prosecuting others for the same activity. And Charles Rangel, the man who serves as chairman of the committee that writes the tax code, “forgot” to pay taxes on his Dominican Republic property for 20 years!
I know, I know… it’s tempting to say, “When’s the karma going to kick in for all of the other guys who seem to have been escaping the consequences of their actions?” To that I would answer… be patient and watch as their lives unfold in the coming years. Remember, it hasn’t been that long ago that we were asking the same question about O.J.
The best thing you can do is forget about everyone else’s karma and focus on your own. And the best way to do that is to live every moment as though the whole world were watching.
[Ed. Note: Karma or no karma, good deeds and honest living make you a better person from the inside out. Of course, as with any worthwhile pursuit, becoming a better person takes work. Sometimes you need a little push to get yourself going... and some simple techniques to help you become the person you've always wanted to be. Discover how to get everything you want out of life right here.
For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's best-selling dealmaking audio series. And be sure to sign up for his Voice of Sanity e-letter.]
There are some people who aspire to have power over others. And there’s not a person on this earth who hasn’t found himself on the short end of that power stick at one time or another.
Have you ever asked yourself what it is that gives someone power over you? The truth be known, it’s a matter of perception – both the other person’s and yours. By this I mean that most power is abstract, and therefore impossible to quantify.
So the question becomes, “If the power someone holds over you is abstract, how can you overcome it?” Answer: You simply refuse to grant permission. You see, the only power another person can have over you is the power you give him.
Which means it’s really your power. And only you can grant another person permission to take your power. By the same token, you can refuse to grant that permission.
Of course, you do not verbally grant permission. It’s much more subtle than that. As I said, power is an abstraction. The way it normally happens is that you get yourself into a position where you need the other person. If, for example, you ask him for a favor, that immediately gives him power over you.
Thus, the surest way to prevent others from having power over you is to be independent. And the corollary to this is that independence gives you power. The plain truth is that even a master intimidator like Donald Trump would have no power over you if you were totally independent. He may be a powerful person in his own right, but his power would not affect you unless you allowed it to. And you certainly are under no obligation to do that.
The next time you feel as though you’re in a position of weakness when dealing with someone, remember that his power is really your power – power that you have given him. And anytime you wish to revoke that power, you need only withdraw your permission for him to use it.
[Ed. Note: For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's best-selling dealmaking audio series. And be sure to sign up for his Voice of Sanity e-letter.
Get three easy-to-follow steps to finding success in any aspect of your life right here.]
Robert Ringer addressed the recent rush of government bailouts in his article “The Great Bailout Stall.” His disparagement of the bailouts – and his own practical solution for America’s financial ills – got quite a response from ETR readers. Here are a few of their comments:
“I generally don’t do ‘letters to the editor,’ but I absolutely *had* to respond to the recent article by Robert Ringer.
“At first, I thought it was some sort of prank letter, the way he was mashing words together (like Demopublicans). But then, as I kept reading, I saw where he was headed.
“Mr. Ringer pointed the finger of blame at everyone, politicians and citizens alike, and challenged the country to wake up, smell the rotting horse manure, stop standing there with a hand out to the government, and DO something to better their lives. After all, if he could do it, so can they.
“He is right. The American people feel they have become *entitled* to everything, yet want *none* of the responsibility of earning or tending to what they have. They *expect* things to be dropped in their lap. And if it doesn’t work (whatever *it* may be: social program, new computer, car, healthcare, etc.,), well then they are *entitled* to have *someone else* fix it for them.
“Frankly, it’s disgusting.
“Sure, bad things happen to good people, but how much of it is of their own doing? How many people, teetering on the brink of bankruptcy, absolutely *must* have their cable and the new 85-inch plasma TV? How many people living on welfare absolutely *must* have those brand-new $200 runners?
“It’s the New American Dream: Bigger, Better, Faster… whether we need it or not.
“It’s no longer ‘keeping up with the Joneses,’ it’s now keeping up with the Joneses, the Johnsons, the Smiths, and little Timmy Walker down the street who got a brand-new GameStation360 for Christmas.
“Bend over folks, the operation *must* commence… now!”
Dion Vansevenant
London, ON
“Bravo, Robert. I think the only correct philosophy of American government is ‘guard my borders, deliver my mail, and keep the hell out of my way.’”
Babe D.
“Robert – that was excellent! You are absolutely right, and well-articulated. I made copies (if that is okay) – and gave to my co-workers.”
Brian Aldridge
Wheaton, IL
[Ed. Note: Has an ETR article struck a chord with you? If so, send us your comments at AskETR@ETRfeedback.com.]
Throughout much of my life, I paid little attention to the miracles that surrounded me. I was too busy thinking about business and money… too busy being annoyed by annoying people. I had no time to think about the real world – the world that matters. Nature and I were perfect strangers.
Funny how life plays out. Who would have thought that some of my best friends would turn out to be trees?
I know that people often say a dog is man’s best friend – and I like dogs… so long as someone else feeds them, walks them, and, well, does all the rest of the stuff that goes along with having a dog as your best friend. But what I like best about trees is that they take care of themselves… and, unlike dogs, they usually outlive you.
My favorite trees are the 75 or so that jut out from the back-left corner of my house at a 45-degree angle, like a perfectly drilled platoon. I visit my leafy pals – who shield me from the outside world – just about every day. In the slightest breeze, they whisper their secrets to me.
A few weeks ago, my trees were having a special evening. Their leaves had turned multi-shades of gold, brown, and reddish-purple. There was a chill in the air, and it was as though they were letting me know they were packing it in for the winter.
On this fine evening, Ravel’s “Bolero” felt right. I hadn’t played that CD for more than a year, but for some reason my hand pulled it off the shelf. As I watched my trees and listened to the music, I thought about the man I used to be. Then I thought about my new best friends… whispering to me through their fluttering leaves… with Ravel’s “Bolero” capturing their message symphonically.
The magical music also brought to mind Dudley Moore in the classic film 10. Remember Dudley Moore, that funny little English guy with the club foot… obsessed with Bo Derek… and, his ultimate fantasy, ending up in bed with her in the posh Las Hadas Hotel in Manzanillo, Mexico… with Ravel’s “Bolero” playing triumphantly on the soundtrack? How in the world could I have possibly known that less than 10 years later I would live in a villa right next door to that very hotel, and that my son would be born in Manzanillo?
Hard to believe, but Dudley Moore has been dead for more than six years now. And Bo Derek, the 23-year-old “10″ in the film is now 52 years old, a grown woman fending for herself… her outrageously handsome svengali of a husband, John Derek, having passed on a full decade ago. These wandering thoughts brought a nostalgic smile to my lips. Yet, at the same time, made me feel sad about how relentlessly life moves forward.
My eyes and thoughts shifted back to the trees.
Soon, I thought to myself, most of the trees will be bare and their appearance will once again be somber. Happily, they are reborn every spring, live life to the fullest in the summer, enter the twilight of their lives in the fall… then, finally, they seemingly die. But not really. In truth, they merely hibernate. It’s more like recycling than death.
Death is but an illusion. And not just for trees in the winter. When a human being dies, he, too, is recycled. Not one atom of the body is lost. The atoms are simply rearranged when the soul moves on. How are they rearranged? It’s not our job to figure that out. As Deepak Chopra put it in his book Life After Death:
“A drop of water becomes vapor, which is invisible, yet vapor materializes into billowing clouds, and from clouds rain falls back to earth, forming river torrents and eventually merging into the sea. Has the drop of water died along the way? No, it undergoes a new expression at each stage. Likewise, the idea that I have a fixed body locked in space and time is a mirage. Any drop of water inside my body could have been ocean, cloud, river, or spring the day before. I remind myself of this fact when the bonds of daily life squeeze too tight.”
When Chopra says “the bonds of daily life squeeze too tight,” it sounds very much like the pressure I felt back in the days when business and making money were the only things I thought about… and still feel occasionally. Perspective is a magic tool for easing those bonds.
Which brings me back to my Ravel’s “Bolero” evening a few weeks ago. My thoughts drifted away from the movie 10, and I began thinking about the recently deceased Paul Newman and a scene from one of his most memorable films, Cool Hand Luke.
Newman’s character, Luke, had escaped from a prison chain gang earlier in the day, and a posse was closing in on him. He takes refuge in an old abandoned church and begins talking to God about what a hard case he has been all his life.
Finally, he gets down on his knees and asks God what he should do. Just then, his fellow escapee, Dragline (George Kennedy), bursts in the side door and frantically warns him that the police are outside. Whereupon Luke, displaying that classic Newman grin, looks up at the ceiling and says, “Is that your answer, Old Man? You’re a hard case too, ain’t you?”
I’ve thought about that scene many times over the years, because the truth is that none of us has a clue about what the “Old Man” has in store for us, and it seems to me that it takes a great deal of arrogance to claim otherwise.
I often think that the world we are so bogged down in is nothing more than a gigantic hoax that nature has played on us. I’m talking about the world we spend most of our time focusing on – the world of media pundits who spew the same old cliches at us day after day… politicians who offer to give us more of our neighbors’ wealth if we will just agree to give them power over our lives… multi-millionaire athletes who lead us to believe that their triumphs will somehow make our own lives more worthy and fulfilling… nonsense and illusions that must surely cause nature to smile at us condescendingly.
In my heart of hearts, I believe that what we normally think of as the real world isn’t real at all. It’s as though we’re all children acting out a play on a spherical stage spinning around in space.
But the trees… and everything else that we call “nature”… perhaps they know the answers to all the questions whirling around in our heads: How did we get here? Why are we here? Where are we going? The fact is that we just don’t know. Walt Whitman may have come up with an answer that transcends all others when he wrote, in his poem Miracles, “To me, every hour of the light and dark is a miracle, every cubic inch of space is a miracle.”
And speaking of miracles, the miracle of spring isn’t as far away as you might think. I love spring, because it invigorates the soul by serving as a reminder that nothing ever really dies. If you, too, sometimes feel the need to ease the bonds of daily life, I highly recommend that you start taking a closer look at the real world – the world that’s all around you – and spend less time thinking about the shallow, insane world that most of the human race only believes is real.
[Ed. Note: Improving your life starts from the inside out. Yes, you need to take action in order to move yourself forward to success. But sometimes you need a little push to get yourself going... and some simple techniques to help you accomplish your dreams. Discover 189 ways to get everything you want out of life.
For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's best-selling dealmaking audio series. And be sure to sign up for his Voice of Sanity e-letter.] http://www.robertringer.com/]
Americans love to throw around the term “hero.” But what is a hero? We tend not only to ascribe the word to illiterate athletes, but to people who happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, as well.
An extreme example of the latter would be the infamous Iran-hostage “crisis” that ended after 444 days on January 20, 1981. With Kim Jong Il’s best friend, Jimmy Carter, spending more than a year trying to remove his thumb from his left nostril, Iran’s version of Crazy Guggenheim – Ayatollah Khomeini – had things pretty much his way.
But once Ronald Reagan was elected president, Krazy Khomeini started envisioning a nuclear cloud over Iran for the next 400 years. Which, in turn, motivated him to come to his senses and release the hostages. Like every other civilized person, I was happy for both the hostages and their families.
Nevertheless, when the media started portraying them as heroes and New York held a tickertape parade for them, I was baffled. You happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and you’re hailed as a hero? I think a little perspective is called for. To me, a hero is someone who accomplishes extraordinary feats under extraordinarily difficult circumstances, such as the firefighters who marched into the World Trade Center towers in an attempt to save lives while everyone else was scurrying to get out.
In this regard, I have great admiration and respect for Jessica Lynch, the American soldier who was captured and held prisoner in Iraq, and was subsequently rescued in a daring raid by U.S. troops. My admiration and respect are a result of her making it clear to a national television audience that she was not, in fact, a hero.
Despite the way she was depicted by The New York Times and other major publications, she explained, in an interview with Diane Sawyer, that there was no truth to any of those stories. In fact, Lynch said that not only did she not do any fighting, she was hurt so badly that she didn’t even remember what happened to her. When Sawyer asked why she would volunteer such information, she explained that she could not live with herself if she allowed people to believe that she fought heroically when she had not.
So though Lynch is not a hero, her refreshing honesty and humility command enormous respect, especially in this day and age of declining Western values.
Thinking back to the Iran hostage situation reminds me of two genuine heroes – 13-year-old Mattie Stepanek, who succumbed to a severe case of muscular dystrophy, and Christopher Reeve, who became a quadriplegic after a horse-riding accident and passed away as a result of complications from an infection.
At the age of 10, Mattie Stepanek wrote Heartsongs, a book of poetry that became a New York Times #1 best-seller. He followed that remarkable feat with four more books of poetry, two of which also became best-sellers. He was a frequent guest on The Oprah Winfrey Show, Good Morning America, and Larry King Live. His messages were always upbeat, positive, and inspiring. Few adults have ever spoken with more wisdom and deep insight into life than Mattie.
Christopher Reeve was beyond amazing. Though he had to struggle just to breathe, he found the time, energy, and determination not only to continue acting but also to direct a film, take an active role in fighting for stem-cell research, testify before Congress, and appear on virtually every major television talk show.
Other than recognizing these two giants of courage as true heroes, what else can we learn from their lives?
• Heroes come in all shapes and sizes.
It seems somewhat ironic that the joint subjects of this article are a scrawny 13-year-old kid and Superman. But after a lifetime of observation, it’s become clear to me that size, physical strength, skin color, gender, and ethnicity, among other things, are of little significance compared to a will to succeed.
• Though human beings, through the gift of free will coupled with action, are able to exercise a great deal of control over their destinies, the inevitable will always be one of man’s greatest nemeses.
The National Safety Council says that a fatal accident occurs every five minutes in the United States, and a disabling injury occurs every two seconds. There is no question that we have the capacity to stack the odds in our favor when it comes to leading longer, healthier lives. Yet, in a head-to-head battle, we are no match for the inevitable. This, however, does not mean that you should become a fatalist and stop trying. That would be irrational on its face.
What it does mean is that you should always keep in mind that there’s an offsetting positive to every negative, and the offsetting positive to the inevitable is that it teaches the wise person humility. Do everything possible to stack the odds in your favor. Work hard at success in all areas of your life, but make certain you don’t become so enamored with yourself that you start believing you’re omnipotent, immortal, or both.
Remember, you’re always just one bad break away from becoming a quadriplegic, getting a terminal disease, or suffering a fatal accident.
• Relativity.
It may sound trite, but you really should be grateful when you wake up every morning, especially if you have been blessed with good health.
Given that a handicap is defined as anything that makes achievement more difficult, each of us is burdened with many handicaps. Not necessarily physical handicaps, but handicaps just the same. Broken marriages, financial problems, lack of a track record – the list of factors that can make achievement more difficult is infinite.
Brooding over a handicap, whatever it may be, is a surefire way to increase its negative impact on your life. You brood, you lose. Whenever you feel as though the temptation to feel sorry for yourself is taking control of your emotions, refocus your thoughts on genuine heroes like Mattie Stepanek and Christopher Reeve.
When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. Heroes are great teachers. They lead by example. All that is required is that you be ready to learn.
[Ed. Note: Improving your life starts from the inside out. And it IS possible for you to become a hero. Yes, you need to take action in order to move yourself forward to success. But sometimes you need a little push to get yourself going... and some simple techniques to help you accomplish your dreams. Discover 189 ways to get everything you want out of life.
For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's best-selling dealmaking audio series. And be sure to sign up for his Voice of Sanity e-letter.]
A few months back, I wrote an article for another publication that sent my e-mail inbox into spasms. The point of the article was that everyone complains about illegal immigration, but few seem willing to endorse real solutions.
I said that if people were really serious about stopping the tidal wave of illegal immigrants, there are many ways it could be accomplished. I then offered a number of rather harsh (by today’s touchy-feely standards) solutions that could be implemented, and followed each of them with this tongue-in-cheek afterthought:
“Of course, I myself would never favor such a heartless measure, but one would think that those who demand a solution to the illegal-immigration problem would endorse it with open arms… if they were really serious about it.”
I thought it was a clever touch of sarcasm that my readers would enjoy. That said, below is a small sampling of excerpts from reader e-mails that will give you a pretty good idea of just how much they DIDN’T enjoy it.
“Prior to this article, I thought that you had some intelligence. This article proved that you have NONE.” – Bob
“Hey, a__hole. If you like Mexicans so much, and think importing thieves, murderers, drug smugglers, and child molesters is a good idea, then I hope your family is destroyed by an illegal rapist, molester, or perhaps a drunk Mexican driver. … I hope you and your ilk burn in hell.” – James
“Sir, you are an idiot.” – R.R.
“May your illegal-alien-staffed endeavors be damned!” – Mad As Hell Momma
“I’ve been an avid reader of yours… until this column.” – Mike
“If you love having a lower class of slave labor, move to Mexico where they live that way every day. … Please leave your passport at the door as you depart.” – M.E.B.
“Too bad you don’t know sh__ about the real world. … You have zero credibility with [those of] us that live in the USA of today. … Enjoy your cheap lettuce.” – Scott
“Boy, you sure had me fooled. Some of your previous articles had led me to believe you had good sense. … What a splendid example of shallow thought.” – B.J.H.
“I do not want to ‘press 2 for Espanol.’ I do not want a Mexican or a Hispanic caucus in Congress. I do not want my heritage belittled in the name of Hispanics, Muslims, or any other non-American group. … [the] hell with tolerance and diversity. … How do you fail to see the truth?” – W. S.
“Sorry guy, but you’re full of it. You’re just another apologist for the illegals.” – J.S.
It’s obvious that a lot of readers failed to pick up on my tongue-in-cheek handling of this lightning-rod issue and, thus, completely missed my point.
So what did I learn from this torrent of e-mails? Plenty. One of my most important writing rules is: If even one reader misinterprets my words, it’s my fault. What that one reader is telling me is that I have not made my case clearly enough. It’s not the reader’s obligation to figure out what I’m trying to say. Writing effectively means writing in a way that every reader will clearly understand.
Even if you’re not a professional writer, you should follow this rule when writing letters, e-mails, advertisements, agreements, or just about anything else. Unfortunately, the modern-day overuse of e-mail has made people even worse writers than they used to be – and most people have always been pretty bad writers to begin with.
There’s no question that e-mail is a marvelous tool, but not when the messages you receive are so sloppy that, rather than trying to decipher them, it’s easier and much quicker to simply call the sender and discuss the subject over the phone.
You should make a conscious effort not to fill your e-mails with unidentifiable flying pronouns, third-grade grammar, and lazy or nonexistent punctuation. If the recipient doesn’t understand what you’re saying, you’re wasting both his time and yours.
But perhaps the best lesson I learned (make that relearned) was from the many apologies I received from readers. Those apologies resulted from my sending out an explanatory e-mail to those who had lambasted me because they missed my attempt at humor in the article. In particular, consider the following four excerpts:
“Boy am I embarrassed! I admit I just skimmed the article. Sorry!” – J.S.
“I should have listened to my instincts and taken more time to analyze your message.” – J.M.
“If you’re going to do satire, sarcasm, parody, or tongue-in-cheek, there has to be some sort of clue for us clueless types out here in the hinterlands. … Sorry for the confusion.” – M.M.
“I looked hard for sarcasm and did not think I was finding it. … I humbly apologize for my rude language. You have shown your class with your polite reply.” – K.S.
Take the two comments “I admit I just skimmed the article” and “I should have… taken more time to analyze your message.” Remember these comments when you write – especially when writing ad copy. Readers normally don’t take the time to carefully dissect what you have written. They skim. And if they skim, they can easily misinterpret your words.
And how about “there has to be some sort of clue for us clueless types” and “I looked hard for sarcasm and did not think I was finding it“? In other words, you can’t assume your reader is in sync with you. He’s not in your head. And because he has other things on his mind, it’s presumptuous to believe that he should know when you’re being facetious… unless you give him a clear signal.
Also, don’t make facetious statements that are so subtle a person has to be a well-informed “insider” to catch them. Readers hate feeling like they’re on the outside looking in. This is especially true when writing ad copy. You don’t just throw it out there and count on the reader to figure it out.
Lead your reader by the hand, word by word – straight to the sale. Writing effectively increases sales. I’m always amazed at ads that are filled with statements I either don’t understand or have to think about for a while in order to figure out what the copywriter was trying to say.
The bottom line is that whether it’s an article, ad, letter, e-mail, or any other kind of written document, you should always keep in mind that the person on the receiving end is not going to be intently focused on what you’re trying to say – and write accordingly.
[Ed. Note: Becoming a better, clearer writer is critical to your personal and business success. But even more important, becoming a strong writer can help you attract customers and make sales. You can discover hundreds of money-making techniques for writing marketing copy that sells right here.
For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's best-selling dealmaking audio series. And be sure to sign up for his Voice of Sanity e-letter.]
Perception is a topic that has always fascinated me. When a person is revered, the reverence quickly disappears if something happens that changes the public’s perception of that individual. If, for example, the person on the receiving end of the adulation is exposed as a fraud or falls into disgrace, admiration soon turns to contempt.
I thought about this while watching a show about Roman Emperor Caligula on The History Channel. Caligula’s given name was Gaius Caesar Augustus Germanicus. When he was a little boy, his father, Germanicus, dressed him in the military uniform of the day, including sandals called “caliga.” As a result, the troops nicknamed him Caligula (”Little Boots”).
Germanicus was the JFK of his time, a charismatic figure who was loved by the Roman citizenry. Emperor Tiberius, fearful of his popularity, sent him off to Asia to kick some butt for the Empire, and he later died in Syria under rather mysterious circumstances that many assumed had been engineered by Tiberius.
Ultimately, Tiberius had Caligula’s mother and two brothers put to death, and, after years of torment and being shuffled from one relative to another, Caligula was brought to live at the emperor’s palace. For reasons that still puzzle me, Tiberius named him as co-heir, along with his cousin Tiberius Gemellus.
After Tiberius’s death, because of their fond memories of his father, the Roman people were wildly excited when Caligula ascended to power. It was the way a large percentage of Americans might have felt had John F. Kennedy Jr. been elected president.
Shortly after becoming emperor, Caligula had his joint-heir, Tiberius Gemellus, “eliminated.” But no one seemed to see this as a sign of things to come. Probably the main reason it was ignored was that he lavished money and other goodies on the people of Rome – and, much like today’s free-lunch recipients, they adored him for his “generosity.” It was a veritable love fest.
Then, suddenly, Caligula shifted into a different mode and began a reign of cruelty and depravity that was extreme even by Roman standards. As a result, the people soon came to fear and hate him. Ultimately, after less than four years in power, his own guards stabbed him to death.
Did something happen that caused Caligula to suddenly go insane? There has been much speculation about it over the centuries, but no one will ever know for certain. Regardless, when the perception of the man changed, adoration for him was replaced by hatred.
Does the story of Caligula strike a chord with you? How many people can you think of who lost their goodwill when their actions caused them to fall from grace? How about Mike Nifong, who was perceived as a no-nonsense prosecutor in Durham, North Carolina – a man who was willing to step up to the plate and defend a woman of color who had been raped by three rich, white lacrosse players from Duke.
But, suddenly, the truth descended upon him with a vengeance. At some point in his investigation, Nifong became aware that those three white kids were not guilty of the rape, yet he moved relentlessly forward with the case – notwithstanding the fact that convictions could have sent the young men to prison for life. If one believes in the concept of evil, this is about as close to it as a human being can get. What is your perception of Mike Nifong today?
For more than two decades, O.J. Simpson was a great role model – congenial and beloved by millions. A mutual friend once introduced me to him, and I recall thinking what a really nice guy he was. But since it became clear that he savagely butchered two innocent people, he has been reviled by all but the most brain-dead among us.
According to those who know him best, O.J. was always the O.J. we know today – a narcissistic, violent person with no sense of moral responsibility or social conscience. And now the public’s perception of that famous smile is that it was a way of thumbing his nose at the law and at the families of his victims. Now that he finally appears to be headed for many years in prison, what is your perception of O.J. Simpson today?
Mark McGwire was the Paul Bunyan of baseball, hitting an unfathomable 70 homeruns in 1998 to shatter Roger Maris’s record of 61. But what made him such a legendary figure was his nice-guy image. Who can forget his climbing into the stands to hug Maris’s children after breaking their father’s record?
But when McGwire testified before the House Government Reform Committee as part of the Congressional investigation of steroids in sports, he was so evasive that people saw it as a de facto admission of his guilt. McGwire came across as a sullen, weak man, far from the strong, pleasant persona of his playing days. What is your perception of Mark McGwire today? Ditto Barry Bonds.
Unfortunately, no matter how hard we try, our perceptions about people will be misguided a significant percentage of the time. Of course, it’s one thing to be off target occasionally but quite another to be consistently wrong. That’s because the foundational principle of all other success principles is having an accurate perception of reality. Which means that great achievements are virtually impossible if one’s perception of reality is perpetually faulty.
The best antidote to this potentially fatal condition is to pay more attention to what people say than to who they seem to be. In other words, don’t be taken in by credentials, demeanor, or reputation. Hey, you can’t get much better credentials than being emperor of Rome, and just about everyone got misled on that one.
Likewise, just because someone doesn’t have great credentials doesn’t mean he doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Some of the best insights I’ve heard over the years have come from “no name” people.
There is no magic way to sort out worthwhile information from junk. The truth of the matter is that it’s up to you to weigh the content of people’s words and make good decisions about them. And to do that, you have to be vigilant about not becoming mesmerized by appearances. It’s especially true in today’s world of criminal government.
In the words of Buddha, “Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.” If he were alive today, my guess is that Buddha would add the words “especially when it comes to government.”
It’s something to ponder as you go about trying to deal with the delusions that are being fed to us daily by politicians and their talking heads in the media.
[Ed. Note: Improving your life starts from the inside out. Yes, you need to take action in order to move yourself forward to success. But sometimes you need a little push to get yourself going... and some simple techniques to help you accomplish your dreams. Discover 189 ways to get everything you want out of life.
For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's best-selling dealmaking audio series. And be sure to sign up for his Voice of Sanity e-letter.]
Now that the Demopublicans and their media friends have, through the magic of doublespeak, transformed the massive and fraudulent bailout bill into a heroic “economic rescue plan,” most Americans can refocus their couch-potato efforts back on reality TV shows, football, and electronic gadgets. After all, the problem has been resolved, right?
Earth to American taxpayers: Nothing has been resolved! In fact, dishonest and cowardly Congressmen/women have virtually assured us, through their actions, that the financial crisis will get worse – much worse.
Nevertheless, I’ve learned, through experience, that no one can accurately predict the timing of economic events, because everything is controlled by an entity – the government – that has a monopoly on (1) printing “money,” (2) taxing its serfs, and (3) using force against anyone who dares to defy its will.
If you could print your own money, make others give you their money, and use force in the marketplace to achieve your ends, do you think you might be able to prolong the consequences of your actions? You would, of course, eventually fail. But it would be impossible for anyone to predict at what point in time your misdeeds would bring you down.
The most practical solution to America’s financial ills is to face the music- now, rather than later. The major question of our time has not been raised by anyone in the media: Are you prepared to lower your standard of living – even suffer – so your children and grandchildren can enjoy a better standard of living and not have to suffer worse than you?
Put more directly, are you prepared to face the moral and Constitutional reality that you are entitled to absolutely nothing other than the right to pursue your own success and happiness in any way you so choose, so long as you do not commit aggression against others?
In other words, are you prepared to go “cold turkey” in exchange for freedom? I’m sorry to say that my personal take on the pulse of our country is that not many people are willing to give up (a false sense of) security in exchange for freedom. Which is why even the staunchest conservatives in the Republican wing of the Demopublican Party will not name specific government programs they would be willing to eliminate. (Not cut – eliminate.)
When the hopeless, stand-for-nothing J. McBama talks about “letting the marketplace sort things out for the economy,” he is quick to assure voters that the government will, of course, pay unemployment benefits to those “in need,” retrain (as in $$$) people who have lost their jobs, etc., etc., etc.
Message to J. McBama: It’s not the government’s Constitutional role to shore up people who have lost their jobs – nor does it have a moral right to do so. Job loss and job retraining are simply none of the government’s business.
And, contrary to what politicians, the media, and most Americans seem to believe, it’s not the government’s job to “get the economy moving again.” Sorry, but it’s simply not in the Constitution. Economic stability can be created only by allowing the market to take its natural course and rid the economy of synthetically created wealth.
In more blunt terms, what I’m talking about here is a deflationary depression. Make that a massive deflationary depression. As I’ve said so often, we’ve been in an invisible depression for at least 30 years. What I’m advocating is that we ignore the daily lies that come out of Washington and demand that the invisible depression be allowed to reveal itself.
I can already hear some readers saying, “That Ringer is a really bad guy. He lacks compassion.”
Not so. On the contrary, I have a great deal of compassion for the millions of people who are hurting financially. And, quite frankly, it makes me angry when I think about what politicians have done to bring about so much of their pain and suffering.
I know what it’s like to be homeless. I know what it’s like to have your gas and electricity shut off. I know what it’s like to be without a car. I know what it’s like to eat cold, canned soup for dinner. But I’ll tell you this: The only way I ever improved my bad situation was to look in the mirror, face the reality that suffering was going to be an integral part of my life until I could turn things around on my own, and work my tail off – sometimes 18 to 20 hours a day. I never applied for welfare and I never asked anyone to retrain me. I lowered my standard of living … I suffered … and I worked hard.
Now I’m going to share a somewhat gross analogy with you to help make my point that the only viable solution to America’s financial demise is to allow the invisible depression to become visible as quickly as possible.
Many years ago, before modern medicine had come up with more humane procedures for dealing with hemorrhoids, I suffered through a period of extreme discomfort. Over the course of about a year, I visited two proctologists, but nixed letting them put me under the knife. Instead, they gave me a variety of salves and ointments to deaden the pain. As a result, I had “invisible” hemorrhoids. They were still there, of course, but by applying medication, I could pretend they weren’t. What a marvelous delusion.
Finally, it got to the point where salves and ointments could no longer bail me out. In desperation, I went to a third doctor – one who’d been touted in a newspaper article as “the best in his field.” After a cozy little examination, he said to me: “I’ll give it to you straight. Your problem will never get better on its own. The only way to get rid of it is through surgery.”
I was in such pain that, without even thinking about it, I blurted out, “When can you do it?”
“Tomorrow,” he said. “It’s my day in surgery.”
Without giving myself the opportunity to mull over it (and probably put it off), I impulsively said, “Okay.”
Out of respect to your sensibilities, I won’t give you the gory post-operation details. Let it just suffice to say that, for the first few days, I regretted having been so impulsive. But soon I started to get progressively better. And within a month, the entire experience was nothing but a bad dream – and I was pain-free. I had survived the medical equivalent of a deflationary depression by getting it over with.
Now, I ask you to help spread the word – friend by friend, neighbor by neighbor, coworker by coworker – that what America needs is a hemorrhoid operation, not more bailouts. That means a lot of pain and suffering for all of us. And, make no mistake about it, we deserve it for having allowed our elected officials to turn the Constitution upside-down and dupe us into believing that we are obliged to answer to them rather than the other way around.
The time has come for us to tell the politicians that we don’t want any more economic salves and ointments. The only way for things to get better is for government to get out of the way and stop making things worse. I say: My fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for yourself.
[Ed. Note: You too can survive – and even prosper – during this recession. The best way to do so is by starting your own Internet-based business. At ETR’s 2008 Info-Marketing Bootcamp, 12 experts in making money will reveal their $100,000 secrets. Reserve your spot today – and you could be on your way to making $1.2 million in 2009.
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The media had a field day stripping John Edwards of his “two-Americas” robe, but I’d rather focus on the Greek tragedy Edwards now finds himself starring in. There are a number of insights we can derive from it… especially when we examine the plight of Edwards’s wife, Elizabeth.
I can relate to Mrs. Edwards’s situation, because it reminds me of the last years of my sister’s life. After about 40 years of marriage, through most of which she endured subtle verbal abuse, my sister discovered that her husband had been cheating on her for quite some time. After considerable emotional turmoil and an attempt at reconciliation, she finally filed for, and obtained, a divorce.
A couple of years later, my sister’s oldest son died in a horrific automobile accident. It was a devastating blow, one from which she never fully recovered.
Then, about eight years after her son’s death, her doctor handed over her own death sentence in the form of a diagnosis of terminal lung cancer. Sadly, she had been a three-to-four-pack-a-day smoker since she was a teenager. The news stunned our family… and, unfortunately, her end came slowly and painfully.
Because of the difference in our ages – and the fact that we lived 2,500 miles apart – my sister and I had never been particularly close. But when one of her children called to tell me the end was near, I dropped everything and flew to California to see her. If you’ve ever had a relative or good friend die of cancer, you know it’s a pretty grim experience.
I’m thankful I was able to see my sister before she died, because it gave me the opportunity to tell her, in person, that I loved her. Although she had been drifting in and out of consciousness, she opened her eyes, turned her head slowly toward me, and, as I held her hand in mine, said with a faint smile, “Really?” She seemed genuinely pleased by my words. I will always feel good about that.
I sat by her side for about two hours, though she no longer seemed to be aware that I was present. When the time came for me to leave for the airport, I kissed her on the forehead, said goodbye, and walked toward the bedroom door.
When I reached the door, I turned and looked back at her, realizing that I would never see her again. And I remember wondering to myself what the purpose of her life had been. She had barely made a ripple while she was here… then suffered triple painful blows during her remaining years. I could hear that old Peggy Lee song – “Is that all there is?” – in my head.
In her youth, my sister was very pretty, very bright (graduating second in her high school class), and extremely popular with both girls and guys. But before she could even make it to college, she married Prince Charming. She could never have imagined what was in store for her.
On the plane ride home, I thought about how sad the last years of my sister’s life had been: a bitter divorce… her brilliant, loving son dead in an instant in a cataclysmic clash of steel and glass… her own slow, painful death. The suffering she endured during those 10 years is still unfathomable to me.
Though I know very little about Elizabeth Edwards as a person, I thought about my sister when I first heard that her breast cancer had returned. She not only is the same age as my sister was when she passed away, she, too, lost a young son in an automobile accident.
Though I have always had a low regard for John Edwards (as I do for anyone who arrogantly anoints himself as the savior of “the poor”), I felt genuine empathy for both him and his wife as a result of the two terrible blows they had endured in such a short period of time. But who could have imagined that a third, and, in many ways, even worse, blow was yet to come?
When a husband tells his wife he’s been having an affair, it’s painful for both parties. But rational people recognize that, to one extent or another, we’re all “sinners”… we all make mistakes. Put another way, even good people sometimes do bad things.
But when you throw in the fact that a man’s wife has incurable cancer, it takes a person of incredible goodwill to be able to write off that man’s affair as just a “mistake.” Now, it appears that even after Edwards admitted his indiscretion, he was still carrying on the affair… while his wife was bearing the burden of coming to grips with her mortality.
I don’t even want to think about the possibility that the National Enquirer is right about Edwards’s plans to marry his mistress after his wife dies. That would be a dark side to this story that only a saint could forgive.
No human being should have to endure the succession of blows Elizabeth Edwards has taken… and, I fear, may have to suffer as additional facts are brought to light about her husband’s indiscretions (plural).
No matter what issues or sadness you are dealing with in your own life, unless you can match Elizabeth Edwards’s hand card for card, it would be a good idea to make an effort to be grateful for what you have – and what you don’t have.
With few exceptions, no matter how heavy our burdens may be, there are millions of people around the globe who are much worse off than we are. As Socrates put it: “If all our misfortunes were laid in one common heap whence everyone must take an equal portion, most people would be contented to take their own.”
One last thought: A good definition of a near-divine human being might be “someone who always takes into consideration how his words and actions might affect those he loves – then speaks and acts accordingly.” Something we mortals might do well to aspire to.
[Ed. Note: Improving your life starts from the inside out. Of course, thinking good thoughts about yourself and others isn't all you need to do. You need to take action in order to move yourself forward to success. But sometimes you need a little push to get yourself going... and some simple techniques to help you accomplish your dreams. Discover 189 ways to get everything you want out of life.
For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's best-selling dealmaking audio series. And be sure to sign up for his Voice of Sanity e-letter.]
A couple of weeks ago, my wife and I had an appointment in Arlington, VA. As we were walking toward our destination, we noticed a thin, elderly lady standing near the street corner. She was exceptionally well groomed, and dressed in a colorful, neatly pressed outfit.
Leaning on her cane, she was looking around in what appeared to be a confused manner. We were concerned, because the temperature was well into the 90s, and it was a very humid day. As we approached her, my wife asked if she needed any help. She smiled sweetly and said that she was looking for her dentist’s office, but was not certain she was walking in the right direction.
She went on to explain that she had glaucoma and could not see very well. When she gave us the name of her dentist, I told her that it was just on the other side of the street, and said we would be happy to help her across. She appeared to be pleased by the offer.
My wife and I took hold of her arms, waited for the streetlight to change, then slowly helped her to the other side. As we approached the curb, she explained that even though she was not totally blind, she could not see the curb clearly enough to be sure she wouldn’t trip and fall.
We carefully guided her up over the curb and onto the sidewalk. She assured us that she could make it into the dentist on her own, so we wished her a nice day and began to turn away. Then, suddenly, the kindly little lady began talking to us about her life and her family. She said she was 90, and her eldest sister was still alive at age 99. She also mentioned that she had another sister who had passed away.
Several times, I said that we had to be running along to avoid being late for our appointment – and each time, she went on to another subject. Her deceased husband… her osteoporosis… her son who was a medical doctor. She seemed genuinely excited to have someone to talk to, and clearly did not want the conversation with two strangers to end.
It was obvious that she was lonely. One side of me wanted to stay and talk to her for as long as she wished, but the “responsible” side of me was thinking of our appointment. Awkwardly, we finally ended the conversation.
As my wife and I walked away, we turned around and watched that adorable little lady walk, with considerable difficulty, toward the door to the dentist’s office. I couldn’t help wondering if her doctor-son knew that his mom was walking by herself to the dentist in 90-degree heat.
As a result of that unexpected encounter in Arlington, many thoughts drifted through my mind the remainder of the afternoon. First and foremost, I thought about my 98-year-old mother. My mother was the ultimate housewife/mom at a time when such an occupation was considered noble. She spoiled the heck out of me, and I loved every minute of it. More important, I loved her to pieces… and still do.
I remembered how, from the time I was about six years old, whenever I spotted the smallest bit of debris on the floor, I would pick it up and throw it in the wastebasket because I didn’t want my mom to have to bend over. Now, with six children of my own, I’m still in awe of the fact that she, merely by being who she was, motivated me enough to want to spare her any unnecessary work.
I’m thankful that, in their senior years, I was able to do so much for, and with, my parents. A fabulous trip to Hawaii, full of joy and laughter, comes quickly to mind. Sunday night dinners at Matteo’s and gourmet meals at The Bistro in Beverly Hills, too. Having lived through the golden age of Hollywood, my mom and dad got a big kick out of eating at celebrity haunts like these.
I also thought about how long it’s been since I visited my mother… and about the time, when my brother-in-law’s mother died and I offered my condolences, he said, in a reflective tone, “You only have one.” As we go about our day-to-day lives, I guess it’s pretty easy to forget the obvious.
I think one of the chief reasons we tend to brush aside the elderly is that the society we live in is not only drowning in materialism and narcissism, but is a throwaway society as well. No one fixes anything anymore. When something is broken, you just throw it in the trash can… and then buy a new and better model.
So it’s only natural that we do the same thing with old people, right? After all, they can’t be fixed, so why not just throw them away? It’s too bad we place so little value on the elderly, because, on the whole, they have so much to offer. Wisdom… purity of thought… and, above all, tranquility. If the medical community could transplant an 80-year-old brain into a 21-year-old skull, one can only imagine how much better the life of the young person who owned that skull would likely turn out.
I believe it’s healthy to be conscious of the fact that we’re all on our way to the same destination: old age (provided we’re luckier than the Tim Russerts and Tony Snows among us). And when we arrive at that destination, let’s hope that we won’t be walking down a street alone, cane in hand, barely able to see the curb. And that our children will visit us often.
As Katharine Hepburn once said, “Life is hard. After all, it kills you.”
[Ed. Note: Improving your life starts from the inside out. Of course, thinking good thoughts about yourself and others isn’t all you need to do. You need to take action in order to move yourself forward to success. But sometimes you need a little push to get yourself going… and some simple techniques to help you accomplish your dreams. Discover 189 ways to get everything you want out of life.
For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer’s best-selling dealmaking audio series.
Amidst all the insanity and meaningless chatter that overwhelms us each day, every so often we get a break – and get hooked into nature’s Sanity Support System. We have little control over when the blessed intervention will take place, how often it will occur, or what its components may be.
In my book Action! Nothing Happens Until Something Moves, I describe one such experience I had on a beautiful sunny day in November, when I was still in my mid-twenties. I was driving on the Grand Central Parkway on my way to JFK International Airport, and my mind was exploding with a thousand and one thoughts about all aspects of my life.
Then, just as I began steering my car south onto the Van Wyke Expressway, my entire life seemed to freeze into sharp focus. It was as though I were being given the means to solve all my business and personal problems simultaneously. It was an impossible-to-describe feeling of total control.
Instead of having to exert the normal intense mental effort to sort out my thoughts, every item that was of importance to me at the time – perhaps 40 or 50 in number – instantly became clearly fixed in my mind in such an orderly fashion that I felt almost omniscient.
It was as though a bright light had suddenly brought my thoughts out of the dark recesses of my subconscious and allowed me to concentrate on all of them at one time. It was a feeling of immense power, joy, and ecstasy.
I live for Sanity Support moments such as these, and only wish that I had the power to bring them into my life more frequently. Still, I’ll take what’s given to me – and this past Sunday evening, a lot was given.
My wife and I had been out for several hours in the humid 95-degree summer heat. When we finally arrived back home, I turned down the air conditioning, kicked back, and cooled off for an hour or so. As time passed, ominous storm clouds began moving into view.
For reasons I cannot explain, and contrary to my Felix Unger personality, we decided to go outside and stroll around on our veranda. There was a deliciously strong breeze blowing, which swept away all thoughts of such secular issues as politics, money, crime, and, above all, petty and banal matters.
And to top it off, coming from our outdoor speakers was a soothing voice from another time – Neil Sedaka. We’re talking Solitaire, King of Clowns, Love Will Keep Us Together…and more. Surely, heaven has Neil Sedaka piped in.
But Neil Sedaka’s wasn’t the only music we could hear. He was just one part of a massive symphony that nature was presenting.
There is a huge conglomeration of tall trees to the left and somewhat distant from our veranda, which creates a shield from the outside world. For what seemed like an eternity, the wind whipped those trees into a choreographed frenzy that brought with it a windy, rustling melody – a melody that seemed as though it were being guided by a master conductor.
It immediately brought to mind the “melody of life” that the late Guy Murchie wrote about so eloquently. According to Murchie, as well as others whose understanding of such scientific issues is far beyond what my brain is capable of absorbing, the earth and every other “sphere” in the universe oscillate much like musical instruments. Supposedly, the two fundamental “notes” to which the earth oscillates are one vibration every 53.1 minutes and another every 54.7 minutes – but I’m not the guy to ask about it.
I do, however, know this: There was music and choreography going on in those trees, and it was happening all around us – as far as the eye could see. If my description is inadequate, it’s because the scene is impossible to describe. Moments like this have to be experienced firsthand.
On and off, light raindrops fell. Like the few other times when nature has hooked me up to her Sanity Support System, I was immersed in metaphysical magic that I did not want to come to an end. I tell you, a man could solve all the world’s problems if he could exist in such a state of high awareness throughout his life. (Buddha? Confucius? Jesus? Baha’u’llah?)
The rain started coming down more heavily, and we were forced to retreat inside. But we talked about those otherworldly moments we had experienced on the veranda for quite some time. I will never forget that evening.
You’ve undoubtedly had similar experiences in your own life… times when you felt only peace and tranquility… and, perhaps for a brief moment, a connection to all the knowledge of the universe. I hope so. But, if not, your time will come.
One bit of advice: When nature’s Sanity Support System makes its appearance, seize the moment. Whatever else you may be doing at the time can wait. Nature, on the other hand, will not. Nature is impatient when she is ready to connect you.
[Ed. Note: It's easy to get caught up in the immediacy and urgency of day-to-day concerns. But part of any balanced life, as motivational guru Robert Ringer points out, is taking time to savor the moment.
Starting your own Internet business could give you the extra income stream you need to have more time for yourself - and for those special moments. Get advice for making this dream happen at ETR's 2008 Info-Marketing Bootcamp. 12 experts will show you how to take your business to $1 million, $100 million, or beyond.
And you don't have to wait for your own Sanity Support System to kick in. Robert Ringer's e-letter is the voice of sanity you need to survive this insane world. Sign up here.]
Forget that Wal-Mart employs 1.3 million people in the U.S. alone. Forget that it saves consumers billions of dollars each year on retail purchases. Forget that its employees, on average, earn about double the minimum wage. The word from some disgruntled employees is that Wal-Mart doesn’t treat its employees “fairly” – whatever that’s supposed to mean.
But, guess what? If you think Wal-Mart is “unfair”… you don’t have to shop there.
Wow! What a novel idea! If you don’t like the fact that Wal-Mart carries too many products made in third-world countries, shop with your feet. If you believe Wal-Mart puts smaller retailers out of business and you’re unhappy with that, shop with your feet.
That said, let’s get back to Wal-Mart’s employees.
Just to make it easy on the witch hunters, let’s assume that there is such a thing as absolute fairness. (There isn’t.) And let’s further assume that Wal-Mart does, indeed, treat its employees unfairly. Keep in mind that if someone chooses to work at Wal-Mart, he’s doing so because he believes, for whatever reason, that it affords him the best opportunity to be adequately compensated for his skills, experience, and efforts.
An employer doesn’t ask a job applicant to present a list of his job requirements when he submits his application. On the contrary, the employer lets the applicant know, in advance, what the company’s conditions of employment are.
If those conditions include 15-hour workdays, minimum-wage pay, no air-conditioning in the summer, and no paid sick leave, so be it. How can I say such a dastardly thing? Because an employee not only does not have to take such a job, he also has the right to quit that job at any time. He is free to choose!
Yep, it really is that easy. And since the unhappy employee is free, he can apply for another job anywhere he likes. No permission needed. On the other hand, if he chooses to stay in his present job, he is making a clear statement that he believes it’s the best job he can hope to get. If that’s not true, he would be insane, or perhaps masochistic, to stay put.
In a truly free society, everything works smoothly because both employers and employees are free to make their own choices. Unfair treatment of employees would never be an issue, because workers would be free to sell their services for the highest possible wages on the open market. It’s only when government bureaucrats or labor thugs – a.k.a. “labor unions” – enter the picture that freedoms are violated.
All government intervention between employers and employees results in infringements on the rights of one or the other – or both. The same goes with labor unions. The so-called “union shop” is a violation of the natural rights of every employee who is forced to join a union against his will. And, worse, it is a violation of the rights of an employer to hire who he wants, when he wants, for whatever reasons are important to him.
Unfortunately, that’s not reality in today’s America. After decades of artificially high wages and benefits, job-protection schemes, and government-mandated safety standards, spoiled American workers demand still more.
An excellent investment for Wal-Mart would be to spend mega-millions to educate its employees about the morality and efficacy of liberty and laissez-faire economics. And a good place to start would be to put the following quote from Rose Wilder Lane in their pay envelopes:
“Anyone who says that economic security is a human right has been too much babied. While he babbles, other men are risking and losing their lives to protect him. They are fighting the sea, fighting the land, fighting diseases and insects and weather and space and time, for him, while he chatters that all men have a right to security and that some pagan god – Society, The State, The Government, The Commune – must give it to them. Let the fighting men stop fighting this inhuman earth for one hour, and he will learn how much security there is.”
Educating muddled minds, however, does not begin with the worker; it begins with big business. If corporate America does not truly believe in laissez-faire capitalism, all is lost. And if it does believe but is unwilling to suffer “mortification of the flesh” in presenting the truth to the public, the case for free enterprise is still all but hopeless.
Corporate leaders must be bold and unwavering when it comes to educating their own employees, as well as the public at large, about the mechanics of the marketplace. History has clearly taught us what to expect if good men do nothing.
In the meantime, don’t wait for corporate America to come to your rescue. Take every opportunity you can get to extol the virtues of freedom – including free enterprise. It’s true that you are but one person in a sea of millions, but it is completely within your power to be part of the solution to the world’s ills rather than part of the problem.
The millions you hope to make in the coming years won’t be of much good to you if the titanic battle for liberty is lost. Think about it.
[Ed. Note: You can exercise your freedom right now - just by starting your own business. ETR's business-building experts have put together an "Internet Success Library" that will walk you through each and every step of creating a successful business on the Internet. Learn how to get your own income stream up and running right here. For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's best-selling dealmaking audio series and sign up for his Voice of Sanity e-letter here.]
I recently received an inspiring e-mail from a young friend of mine, Jay. I had not seen Jay in 30 years, and really only came to know him when he contacted me to inform me that his father, Jack, had passed away. Jack was a genuinely good human being, and I was saddened by the news of his death.
I find it ironic that now, after Jack’s passing, his son and I have become friends. Life is an infinite matrix of twists, turns, and surprises that never ceases to amaze me.
What follows is the major portion of Jay’s poignant e-mail, which so touched me that I wanted to share it with you…
“I have had many setbacks in my life, and many people have asked how I maintain such a great attitude after losing an eye, missing a clavicle since birth, dyslexia, and now diabetes. Many people tell me that if they were me, they would be so depressed they would not be able to function. I simply tell them that worrying about my issues won’t solve anything.
“Steven Covey introduced me to the concept of ‘circle of influence.’ The idea is to mentally place all the things you have the power to influence inside the circle and everything else outside the circle. Then, concentrate on those things that are inside the circle, things that you have the power to change.
“Included within my circle of influence:
“Dyslexia. By continually reading and practicing, I can compensate for my deficit and become wiser and more knowledgeable.
“Diabetes. By exercising and watching my weight, my doctor tells me that the problem will virtually disappear and I won’t need to take insulin.
“Outside of my circle of influence:
“Bad eye. It can’t be fixed, so I don’t worry about it.
“Missing clavicle. I can’t grow a new one, and it doesn’t affect my life negatively, so I just forget about it.
“I am fortunate, because I was taught at a very young age not to worry about the things I cannot change and to concentrate on those things that I can change. I’m happy that I learned this early in life, and I am teaching it to my son. I want him to understand that the most worthwhile lessons in life are the ones we learn through adversity.
“Whenever you fail at something, examine the reason why you think you failed, learn from it, and try again. You may fail a hundred times, but when you finally win, it will be a hundred times sweeter. If life throws you a curve, lean into it, learn from it, and understand how you feel about it. Then, turn it into a positive.
“Even if you don’t think there is a positive aspect to it, some day you may be in a situation that will require you to draw on that experience, perhaps to help someone dear to you through a similar issue.”
When you read something like that, it’s easy to think to yourself, “It’s just another inspirational piece that doesn’t say anything I didn’t already know.” Speaking for myself, I’m not that jaded. I never tire of hearing inspirational stories, especially when they are personal and from the heart.
Jay is much younger than I am, but that matters not. I try to learn from everyone. His e-mail got me to thinking again about the things over which I have some degree of control and those over which I have no control at all. If you seek to have peace of mind, it’s absolutely essential that you not stew and fret over the things you cannot control.
That’s why Dr. Andrew Weil, the superstar health guru of our generation, advises against watching the news or reading newspapers every day. He says the nonstop bad news has a negative impact on our health.
I believe Dr. Weil is right. And I further believe that the reason bad news affects our health is that we know we can’t do anything about it. That causes stress, a breakdown of healthy cells, and a disruption of the body’s natural rhythms.
If you’re like me, you’re probably not willing to cut off the news entirely. (After all, everybody needs to know what’s going on in the world!) But we would all do well to make a conscious effort to ignore the bad stuff over which we have no control. Which, nicely, leaves more time for the good stuff. And the more you concentrate on the good things in your life, the more good things you are likely to have.
[Ed. Note: Of course, concentrating on the good things in your life isn't all you need to do. You need to take action in order to move yourself forward to success. But sometimes you need a little push to get yourself going... and some simple techniques to help you accomplish your dreams. Learn how to get all that and more right here.
For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's best-selling dealmaking audio series.
Glenn Beck recently did a fascinating interview with Ray Kurzweil, the remarkable inventor/futurist. Among other things, Kurzweil, a member of the prestigious National Inventors Hall of Fame, developed the first print-to-speech reading machine for the blind.
Right on Beck’s show, he demonstrated how it works. It was amazing.
While listening to Kurzweil talk, the thought crossed my mind how geniuses like him appear to be able to transcend the junk that you and I allow to flood our brains day in and day out . Dumbed-down infomercials. Round-the-clock sports on TV. Nonstop pain-at-the-pump and global-warming tales. The latest shenanigans of cartoon characters like Vladimir Putin and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. The childish ramblings of our own presidential candidates. Even the scary news flashes about Hollywood celebs who are threatening to emigrate if their candidate doesn’t win the upcoming election.
Listening to Kurzweil reminded me that most of the things people think about, fret about, and argue about don’t really matter much in the long run. Over the past century, we’ve survived a rash of bad presidents and shameless politicians, unthinkable natural disasters, the Great Depression, and "world" wars (along with a few little skirmishes like Vietnam). And humankind stubbornly keeps pushing forward.
I believe one of the biggest reasons for this success is that the people on the leading edge of civilization seem to be unfazed by all the nonsensical stuff.
Now when I say we’ve survived, I admit I’m talking on a macro basis. Between the advances, there is almost always a great deal of pain and suffering for the many people who happen to be living in the wrong place at the wrong time.
The Soviet Union is the best recent example of this. It was only a matter of time until the lie of communism collapsed under its own weight. But for 70 years, hundreds of millions of people suffered and tens of million died. The same was true of Hitler’s Germany, Mussolini’s Italy, Saddam’s Iraq, and Mao’s China. But what’s interesting is how, notwithstanding government’s best efforts to slow human progress, the best and the brightest keep moving mankind forward.
As a result of the exponential progression of information technology, Kurzweil says that the rate of progress itself is now doubling every decade. In fact, he believes we will experience 32 times as much technical progress in the next 50 years as we’ve seen in the last century! It’s hard for a guy like me, whose neurons shut down at the thought of learning how to load my iPod, to comprehend such things.
Kurzweil says that when he first came to MIT, the school had only one computer. It took up an entire floor and cost more than $10 million. Now, the computer in a $50 cellphone is thousands of times more powerful than that MIT dinosaur. Which is why he believes we will see a billionfold improvement in information technology over the next 25 years. And then, in the years that follow, we’ll see it again, and again, and again.
I could go on and on about Ray Kurzweil’s amazing inventions, knowledge, and insights into the future. But the biggest of all his predictions is that due to advances in nanotechnology, we will soon be able to produce highly efficient, lightweight, inexpensive solar panels. As a result, he is all but certain that solar power will provide 100 percent of the world’s energy needs within 20 years – easily and inexpensively. He points out that the sun provides us with 10,000 times more sunlight than we need to accomplish this.
If Kurzweil is right, it not only will put a damper on draconian save-the-planet ideologies aimed at increasing control over people’s lives, it will change the balance of political power worldwide. It would also mean that millions of hours have been (and will be) wasted over debating whether or not to drill through the hides of caribou or dig up our trillions of tons of coal and convert it to oil.
All this reminds me of something that another great futurist, Alvin Toffler, said in his landmark book Future Shock. Toffler believed that at any given time in history, about 90 percent of the population thinks in terms of the past, 7-8 percent have their heads in the present, and 2-3 percent are focused on the future.
When you look back on just the past 10,000 years, the evidence is clear: Human progress accelerates, notwithstanding little inconveniences such as famines, disease, volcanic eruptions, and asteroids paying their respects from time to time.
Don’t get me wrong. In the coming decades, I believe the U.S. is likely to be a totally different place than it is today. We may even have to go through a dictator or two. Perhaps even a couple of revolutions. But the scientific brains and futuristic thinkers don’t seem to pay much attention to politics and social upheaval. They just keep marching forward as though nothing were going on around them.
Nevertheless, the big question that remains is the same one that’s been implied throughout human history: What good does human progress do in such fields as technology, medicine, and energy if there continues to be no human progress in the area of goodwill?
So, what can you and I do about this? Plenty. The thought of ever-greater technology joining forces with ever-greater malice should incentivize each of us to demonstrate – through our actions -a spirit of goodwill.
You and I can’t force anyone else to change to our liking, but we totally control who and what we, as individuals, can become. Rather than joining crusades to save the world, we can accomplish much more by focusing on making ourselves the best human beings we can possibly be.
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