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If You Don’t Know, Don’t Say

Wednesday, August 26th, 2009

I was returning from a flight to Florida’s West Coast. I was five miles out of Orlando Executive (my home airport), and winds were only 5 to 7 knots. But they were coming at an angle that was going to make landing difficult for the runway air traffic control had assigned.

I felt confident I could do it. But, whenever possible, I ask for the runway that makes landing my plane as safe and easy as possible.

I called the controller and made the request, but it was denied. So I went ahead and landed on the other runway.

Before I did, though, I called the controller again and asked for a “time check.” That told him I was not happy and would be speaking with a supervisor. Among other things, the “time check” provides the supervisor with a way to review on-air exchanges between a particular controller and pilot. (Those exchanges are recorded, and I know to be careful to say only what can be used for me and not against me.)

My gut feeling was that the controller didn’t want to do the work involved in switching runways for me. It was late afternoon, right around time for a shift change. But since I couldn’t be sure of his reason for denying my request, I decided to hold off judgment until I had spoken with his supervisor. The supervisor called me the next morning. Long story short, I got an apology from the controller on duty for not having given me the okay. More important, I established a relationship with the supervisor — an articulate, intelligent, savvy guy. He recognized the unique qualities of my plane, and understood why I preferred to land with its nose into the wind. He also agreed with me that a pilot coming in to his home airport should get special consideration.
(more…)

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What Is Your “Elephant Tether”?

Wednesday, August 12th, 2009

Did you know that elephants are trained to stay where they are by tying a rope around one of their massive legs and attaching it to a peg in the ground? Can the peg and rope really hold back an elephant? Absolutely not!

Then why does it work? Because elephants grow up believing it will. Maybe they tried pulling away when they were young with no success. Maybe they were injured by their action. After enough failures, they stop trying. They no longer test the restraint, and confine themselves when tethered to the rope.

During the course of my life and career I have run into many people (and no doubt will run into many more) who are holding themselves captive with their own “elephant tether.”

Cheryl, for example, one of my co-workers years ago, was limiting herself and her goals by always seeking approval from her mother before taking action. Cheryl was a grown woman with a husband, two children, and a nice career. However, she felt the need to filter every decision through her mother. She was still trying to play by her mother’s rules – instead of making her own.

I don’t think Cheryl realized her mother was the peg and rope preventing her from pursuing her own idea of a happy, fulfilling life. I mean, so what if Mom doesn’t approve of your kids eating hot dogs or staying up past 8:00 p.m. on a school night?

But following guidelines set by your parents isn’t the only “elephant tether” that could be keeping you from achieving what you want out of life. Maybe it’s one of these: (more…)

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Are You Afraid of Change?

Wednesday, July 22nd, 2009

I love my new pilot flight gear bag. It’s functional, easy to use, and the perfect size for my cockpit. But I resisted buying it for months.

My previous bag was leather, with custom embroidered initials. It held all my gear and looked cool. But it was a bit bulky. Worse, it kept knocking around my backup NavCom, causing it to stop working. (Not a good thing when you’re 10,000 feet up in the air, as you can imagine.)

My resistance to buying a new flight bag – even when I knew it was the right thing to do – got me to thinking about the nature of change… and the anxiety that often comes with it.

Do you resist change even when you know it will make a positive difference in your life? If so, do what I did: Put it in writing.

Think about a change that could make your life a little easier or better – a small change that you’ve been avoiding because you figure the status quo is “good enough.” It could, for example, have something to do with your behavior, with time-tasking, or with learning a new skill.

Take a sheet of paper and list all the reasons you can think of for making the change. Then list all the reasons you can think of for not making it. Once you see it in black and white, the benefits of taking action will be obvious.

My new flight gear bag may not seem like a big deal, but making that simple change has made every flying experience more enjoyable.

Making a seemingly small change today will produce an equally good result for you tomorrow.

[Ed. Note: Once you've listed your reasons for making a change that will make your life better, healthier, or happier, you'll know what you have to do to make it happen. But if you still feel stuck, success mentor Bob Cox can help. He's helped four Ordinary Joes climb the ranks to become billionaires... and he's willing to share the same secrets of their success with you. Get all the details here.]

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4 Simple Strategies for Maintaining Your Success

Wednesday, July 15th, 2009

Way back in January, you set a goal for yourself. Let’s say you wanted to lose 10 pounds by July 1. After months of hard work and discipline, you’re down nearly 12 pounds! Success!

Now… how do you keep yourself from slacking off and erasing everything you’ve achieved so far? Here are three ways to maintain your success:

1. Work hard even when no one is watching.

Commit yourself to excellence without the need for someone else’s approval. Yes, it is wonderful to receive a “pat on the back” from friends, family, or coworkers. But it’s much better to develop your own personal sense of pride and accomplishment.

2. Never arrive.

This may sound counter-intuitive. But one of the best ways to sustain success is to think of your goal as a construction project that’s always in progress and yet to be completed.

Never see yourself as having finished your goal journey. Condition yourself to actively keep learning. Learn more about your field when your goal is to advance in your profession… learn more about technique when your goal is to advance in a physical skill… and learn more about what everyone else in your industry is doing when your goal is to advance your business.

3. Be persistent.

If you keep going the extra mile – or even taking one more step after everyone else has given up – you will keep getting results. Over time, this will become a way of life… and you will be unstoppable.

[Ed. Note: If you have dreams you want to achieve and goals you want to accomplish, you CAN do it on your own. But you could reach success so much faster with step-by-step guidance from success mentor Bob Cox. Bob - who has worked one-on-one with four billionaires and monitored the techniques they used to succeed - can help you determine exactly what you want out of life and the exact steps you need to take to get there. Find out how to become one of Bob's proteges right here.]

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Tags: goal, guidance, success
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How to Make Room for What’s Important With a Simple 5-Second Exercise

Saturday, July 11th, 2009

It’s easier to accomplish any goal when you make it your top priority. That often means focusing less on something else in your life – or eliminating it altogether – to make room for what now has to be done.

Let’s say you and your spouse are planning for the arrival of your first child – and you’ve made it your number one goal to make sure everything goes smoothly. Well, that’s going to take a lot of time. Regular visits to the ob-gyn… setting up the nursery… reading up on child care. Doing all that requires you to make adjustments to what had been your schedule.

By deciding in advance what you can take out in order to make room for what you are going to put in, you will be ahead of the game.

Try this little exercise to see what I mean…

My goal is to ______________________________.

I can take out _________________________ and ____________________ to make room.

For example:

My goal is to exercise regularly.I can take out staying up late and I can get up earlier to make room.

My goal is to spend more time with my spouse.I can take out playing golf every Sunday and nights out with friends to make room.

My goal is to increase sales.I can take out unimportant meetings and long lunch hours to make room.

Can you see how this works? Now it is your turn!

Take out a blank sheet of paper or open up a Word document, create the template shown above, and start filling in the blanks.

I promise this will help you keep your goals on track, put them back on track, or get yourself started in the right direction.

MaryEllen’s Secret to Enjoying a Balanced Life

MaryEllen Tribby, Publisher and CEO of Early to Rise, is brimming with energy and a passion for excellence in business. She is also married and has three beautiful children.

MaryEllen has a lot on her plate in all areas of her life. She is often asked how she can possibly balance running a multimillion-dollar company AND managing her home life. In an article she wrote for ETR - The Balancing Act That’s Up to You – this mega-successful working woman, wife, and mother gave much of the credit to taking three simple steps:

Step #1. Having the Right Attitude
Step #2. Making the Right Choices
Step #3. Developing the Right Relationships

In the article, MaryEllen shared a story to illustrate Step #2. As it happens, that same story can be applied to my message today.

She had an opportunity to attend a major networking party in Texas. Everyone who is anyone in the information publishing industry was going to be there. She immediately RSVP’d, and began thinking about all the deals she could make that would benefit ETR.

But while reviewing her travel plans with her husband, he pointed out that she would be away on the first day of the new school year. With three young kids in school, this is a huge event in MaryEllen’s world. She wanted to be there!

So even though her husband encouraged her to go, assuring her that he could handle the excitement of the first day of school without her… no way was MaryEllen going to miss it. After thinking through the consequences of missing the networking party or missing the first day of school, she made the decision to send someone else to Texas.

If she had used our little “take out” exercise, she would have come to the same conclusion. She probably would have done it this way:

My goal is to be present at my children’s first day of school.

I can take out the networking event and find time later to talk to or meet with everyone I would have seen that day to make room.

Your Personal Balancing Act

MaryEllen is the first to admit that she is not Superwoman. The truth is, she sincerely believes everyone can have a balanced life.

“You just need to want it… and act to achieve it,” she says.

That works for me, and I am betting it will work for you. You can find your own personal balance by using my “take out” exercise to help manage your priorities. It’s all about taking ownership of what you want – and making room for the good choices you need to make to get your goals done.

[Ed. Note: It is entirely possible to turn every dream you have into reality. Allow success guru and "Mentor to Billionaires" Bob Cox to help you every step of the way. Get all the details here.]

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Tags: Exercise
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What Inspires YOU to Be a Better You?

Friday, June 19th, 2009

Michael Masterson has mentioned that the good and decent acts of friends, family, associates, and strangers have inspired him to make it one of his New Year’s resolutions – every year – to become a better person.

How about you? What inspires you to be a better person?

I consider myself to be still “under construction.” As such, I use goal setting as a way to design my life to match my hopes and ambitions.

When I turned age 50 nearly 10 years ago, I honestly evaluated who I was and who I wanted to be. One of the things I recognized was that whenever I used a “my way or the highway” approach, I inevitably limited my success and slowed down the achievement of my goals.

I consciously began to do what Michael does at the beginning of every year. I set an annual goal of taking action to be a better person. And I invite you to make this one of your goals, too… starting today!

Finding your own faults requires a certain amount of objectivity and candor… and it can be a bit painful emotionally. The second step – figuring out how to overcome those faults – can be tough. And the most difficult part of the process is to take action – to make these changes day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year… until you become the person you envisioned.

Easy? No. But as I can tell you from my personal experience, it is well worth the effort.

[Ed. Note: Bob Cox teaches goal setting 365 days a year with ETR's Total Success Achievement Program. link ETRgoalsetting
Bob also teaches dozens of success skills that he discovered while working with four businessmen who went on to become billionaires.

Find out how to get your hands on his "billionaire secrets" right here.]

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It’s Not All About You

Wednesday, June 3rd, 2009

When you define a goal and ready yourself to commit to the time and energy it will take to achieve it… remember to consider how your efforts are going to be affecting the people in your life. And this isn’t a totally unselfish, “thinking of others” act. You’re going to need their encouragement and support.

So what can you do? How can you get friends, family, and colleagues to endorse and sign off on your goal?

1. Inform them.

Be open and candid with them about what you want to do.

2. Acknowledge them.

Encourage their support by acknowledging that you need them – that their cooperation will be helpful… even vital.

3. Explain what’s in it for them.

Tell them how they’ll be rewarded when you achieve your goal. If, for example, your goal is to get a side business started, explain to your spouse and kids how that second stream of income will give you the ability to update the family car or provide them with more options for the next family vacation.

4. Appreciate them.

Be respectful of what is going on in their lives. Offer assurances that their routines are important to you, and that your intention is to minimize any interference in the achievement of their goals.

[Ed. Note: In the next 11 minutes, you could be well on your way to making an extra $100K, $500K, or even $1 million by this time next year. Get specific advice from Bob "Mentor to Billionaires" Cox about how to change your life and increase your wealth. Find out more here.]

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Money Matters

Tuesday, May 26th, 2009

One of the most interesting things I learned from the individuals I knew who became billionaires is that they considered every dollar to be valuable. Money was a means to advance their goals – in particular, the goal to become wealthy. And you don’t become wealthy by being careless with any amount of money.

I’ll give you an example.

About 15 years ago, I was working with a successful hotel magnate who was opening a convention center. One of the things that had to be installed was an industrial dishwasher – and, at the time, industrial dishwashers retailed for around $40,000.

Millions of dollars were being spent, so you’d think he would have just given his team a quick okay to go ahead and make the purchase.

But no. Experience had taught him that rebuilt equipment was just as good as new. So he had his team do some research to see what it would cost for a rebuilt dishwasher (same make and model).

They found one that was selling for $7,500, and they snapped it right up – for a savings of $32,500 that could be allocated elsewhere.

You should do the same, whether you’re dealing with your business, family, or personal budget. You should always be looking for ways to spend less (or not buy at all). Because every dollar adds up, especially when your goal is to be wealthy.

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The “Be Here NOW” Success Technique

Thursday, May 14th, 2009

Recently I observed a training session for one of my business clients. When a couple of the attendees started goofing around, Lisa, the woman running the session, raised her voice and said: “People – this was paid for by your employer. You are on company time, and I intend to maximize the use of that short time we have together. So please work with me and be here now!”

“Be here now.” That phrase – referring to the awareness of not only being in the moment but staying in the moment over an extended period of time, free of distractions – struck me as being very much in tune with the overall goal achieving process.

Here’s how to apply it to your goals:

Rule #1. Concentrate on defining your objective.

What do you want to accomplish? What matters to you? Why do you want to achieve that particular goal?

Rule #2. Concentrate on one part of your goal at a time.

Break down your ultimate goal into smaller chunks. Keeping on eye on the big picture is great. However, you have to focus on the individual steps that will get you there.

Rule #3. Concentrate on controlling your situation.

When focusing on those individual steps, control your natural tendencies (we all have them) to drift away from the task at hand and/or stop trying if it becomes too challenging or takes too long.

Rule #4. Concentrate on completion.

To achieve any goal, you have to make a commitment to reach the finish line. Strengthen your resolve and keep yourself motivated by visualizing the end result – how excited you’ll be and how great you’ll feel when you reap the rewards of your hard work.

[Ed. Note: Bob Cox is a success coach who can help you achieve goals in every area of your life: professional, social, personal, and beyond. Check out his program here.]

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Does Investing Your Time Guarantee Success?

Saturday, March 28th, 2009

Last week, my wife Karin and I received an e-mail inquiry about one of the goal-setting programs we offer through Early to Rise. The gentlemen indicated that he was at a point where he was looking for a real change, not a temporary fix. He was interested in the program, yet skeptical. He wanted more than a money-back guarantee. He said that he would follow the material to the letter, but was hesitant to invest his time unless we could guarantee that his time wouldn’t be wasted – that the program would work specifically for him.

Karin and I talked about how best to reply. Of course, we stand behind our programs. But, as with any product, a blanket guarantee of results is impossible. Yes, we can return his money if he’s not satisfied. (ETR has an exceptional money-back guarantee.) But no, we can’t return his time.

Our decision was to politely thank the gentleman for his interest.

Taking Action: the Most Important Key to Success

A good program will provide you with the raw materials for achieving your goal – but no one can guarantee that you will actually achieve it.

For instance, an Internet business-building program will give you instructions for setting up a website, starting an e-mail newsletter, and writing sales copy. But the best Internet business-building program in the world won’t help you build a million-dollar business unless you put what you learn to work in the real world. You’ve got to follow those steps for setting up a website and set up a website. You’ve got to use that copywriting information to write sales copy.

When I started off in insurance sales, I had to invest a lot of time in studying to pass the licensing test. Did having an insurance license automatically guarantee that I would make sales? Of course not. I became a successful insurance salesman because I took action. I marketed myself. I mastered dozens of sales techniques. I learned my product inside and out.

Taking action may be the most important component of success – but it’s not the only one. There are three more:

Know What You Want

It is interesting to me that many people spend precious time thinking and talking about what they don’t want. Like that fellow who said he didn’t want to waste his time on our goal-setting program if we couldn’t guarantee it would work for him. Or the people who say they don’t want to be broke… or don’t want to be overweight… or don’t want to lose their jobs… or don’t want more stress.

What they should be doing is turning those negative thoughts around and taking a positive approach: By telling yourself what you want to do (I want to be fit and trim… I want to create additional income… I want to feel relaxed), not what you don’t want to do, you will inspire yourself to take action to achieve the goal.

It starts with forming a specific and detailed plan. This is where visualization is helpful.

If you want to be fit and trim, visualize a new post-weight-loss achievement outfit you are going to buy… or that favorite pair of jeans you want to get back into. In addition, visualize the favorable responses you will get from people when you reach your ideal weight and fitness goal.

If you want to increase your income, visualize how you will feel when you see your bank account balance increase… and what you will do for your family with that money. Would you buy a bigger house? If so, picture exactly where you’ll live – the neighborhood, the size and color of the house, etc. A new car? Picture the exact car you’ll buy.

Measure Your Results Along the Way Keeping track of how you are doing with your goal-setting plan helps you determine the effectiveness of your actions.

You may find that you no longer want to pursue a goal you assigned yourself. Or perhaps you want to modify that goal. Maybe you want to keep the goal but you’ve discovered a more convenient and efficient way to get to the “finish line.” Let’s say you set a physical fitness and weight-loss goal. And the plan you came up with to achieve that goal was to go to the gym three nights a week. You’ve been doing that for two months, and you’re happy with the results. But now you think there’s a good chance you can stay on track by working out at home.

Okay.

Only YOU can determine the most effective way to use your time. But you won’t be able to do that if YOU don’t measure and monitor your progress along the way. Make Constant Improvements The Japanese principle known as “kaizen” (which means continuous improvement) can be applied to all aspects of life. But it is perhaps best known for the way it’s been applied to business.

Some scholars think kaizen is what enabled Japan to go from defeat in World War II to being one of the world’s strongest economies. What the Japanese did was commit to continuously improving their manufacturing industries to be more efficient, cost-effective, and productive. The idea was that everything could always be done better.

This is exactly what we here at ETR want for you! We want you to believe that you can always find new and better ways to achieve your goals. If an action is working and bringing the desired results – do it more often. If an action is not working or throwing you off track – do it less often. (Or eliminate it altogether.)

The beauty of goal setting is that it is all about YOU and what you want to achieve. You choose… you act… you monitor your actions… you celebrate and continue refining your actions.

Each one of us is very different, yet we are all alike in that we are success-seekers on a life journey that is just that – a journey to success. You want guarantees? I can guarantee that you won’t have success unless you are proactive in using the four simple success components I outlined for you today.

[Ed. Note: You can turn your dreams into reality just by implementing a few simple techniques. Success mentor Bob Cox has dozens of powerful strategies that can help you reach new heights in your business and personal life. In fact, these very same techniques helped four "ordinary Joes" become BILLIONAIRES. Discover how to get Bob's proven advice right here. ]

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Knocking Down Your Mental Blocks

Saturday, February 28th, 2009

Why is it that some people succeed and others don’t? This is a conundrum that I puzzled over for years.

I’ve come to the conclusion that there are multiple reasons – and one of the big ones is purely mental.

Ryan Crawford of Sunapee, New Hampshire wrote to me about this very problem:

“When you know what to do to achieve success, and you know it works, how do you make yourself do it? This is a problem most everyone has. All the business smarts in the world won’t do you one lick of good if psychology is standing in your way. How do you rid yourself of mental blocks?”

Good question. I’m sure that many ETR readers are struggling to find the answer.

So today, I’m going to give you some simple guidelines for clearing out the mental clutter that is blocking your success.

3 Simple Steps to Changing Your Attitude

Just as you “spring clean” your house, you can rid yourself of the negative thoughts and feelings that are holding you back and the people who are sabotaging your goals. Here’s what to do:

Step #1. Change the way you think.

Our thoughts govern our attitudes and, therefore, the actions we take. If you work on improving the quality of your thoughts you improve your ability to take action.

Shift from negative thoughts such as “I can’t reach my goal because it will take too long” to “My goal is taking longer than expected, so I need to adjust my schedule accordingly.”

Successful people guard against their own negative thoughts – as well as those of others. This brings us to…

Step #2. Limit your association with negative people.

Sadly, there are many people who choose to view the world in negative terms. They always see the glass as half empty. This doesn’t mean that they are bad people. But it does mean that if you are around them on a regular basis their sour outlook will begin to affect you.

You may not be able to let go of the negative people in your life completely (maybe they are friends, family, or co-workers), but you can limit the time you spend listening to their moans and groans.

Step #3. Let go of the past.

This is huge. And because it is difficult, it takes practice. And then more practice!

Whatever has gone wrong in the past… whoever slighted you… whatever didn’t work out quite the way you intended… let it go! Just let it go.

Banish it from your mind and focus on the here and now. Past failures, rejections, or injustices will hold you back if you keep dragging them forward. They will inhibit the productive thinking and feelings that are needed to establish effective solutions and results.

Cut those chains! Your future is built from today forward.

3 Exercises to Get Yourself Going

• Read something inspirational.

We are thrilled that you read Early to Rise. But what do you do with all that great information?

Embrace just one of the insights or strategies you find in any issue of ETR, and let that inspire you to take action. Michael Masterson has often referenced The Power of One – focusing on just one idea that you can put to work in your life immediately. Why? Because it works!

Here is something else that works…

• Visualization.

Here at Early to Rise, we are big on using the Power of Visualization to keep your motivation strong to accomplish your goals. It also works to remove the mental blocks that get in your way.

Tiger Woods visualizes each and every swing – in detail – before he drives, chips, or putts.

Say you are gearing up for your annual job review or interviewing for a promotion. Visualize exactly what you will wear. Visualize how confident and positive you will be. See yourself answering every question quickly and correctly. See the interviewer smiling and nodding at your answers. Now… go in the room and take your shot.

• Have an upbeat conversation.

This simple exercise is a favorite of mine.

Have an upbeat conversation with your spouse or significant other, a friend or a family member, a co-worker or your boss. Maybe you could reconnect with an old mentor. You could even take this opportunity to speak with someone new. Perhaps the new hire in your office or your new neighbor.

The only rule is that the conversation has to be positive. Put no limits on the topics… just limits on your attitude.

It All Begins With Choice

Toss out those blocks! Toss out the bad and let in the good.

Choose to take action on your thoughts to feel good about yourself, and see how natural it becomes to take action on making any goal a reality!

[Ed. Note: You can turn your dreams into reality just by implementing a few simple techniques. Success mentor Bob Cox has dozens of powerful strategies that can help you achieve new heights in your business and personal life. In fact, these very same techniques helped four "ordinary Joes" become BILLIONAIRES. Discover how to get Bob's proven advice right here.]

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Do Your Personal Goals Take a Back Seat to Work?

Monday, February 16th, 2009

Early in my career I became quite adept at setting a schedule for my workday and sticking to it. This “time tasking” made me very efficient and productive. But I had a heck of a time doing the same when it came to my personal and social goals. I was so involved in moving my business and financial goals forward, I simply ignored the rest. And because of that, I wasn’t making my time outside of work count for much of anything!

Not a good idea. As you know, here at ETR we strongly recommend that you strive for balance in all areas of your life.

Fortunately for me, I realized the error of my ways. About seven years ago, I began applying myself to my personal and social goals with the same vigor as I had been applying to my work goals. I added bowling (a favorite sport) to my weekly schedule, and shot a 300 game last year. I took up golf. I began scheduling time with friends. And after 25 years of being too busy with work, I began taking real vacations with my wife.

Do I sometimes feel like I am “sacrificing” my work for my personal goals? Yes, once in a while. But when I look back at the choices I’ve been making, I realize that the memories I am creating and the sense of well-being I’ve gained from using all my time better are priceless.

Take a second and remind yourself of this important fact: Time cannot be replenished once it is gone. If you’re not including time with friends and family (and time with yourself!) in your schedule, you’re losing that time for good.

[Ed. Note: Success mentor Bob Cox - who has worked with four billionaires

during his career - strongly believes that setting goals in every area of your life can help you make your longest-held dreams come true. Discover proven success strategies and motivational advice right here.]

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Blast Through 5 Roadblocks to Success

Thursday, February 5th, 2009

Following a proven goal-setting system can help you specify your objectives, measure your progress, and stay focused. But what do you do when you encounter roadblocks along the way? Today, I’m going to tell you exactly what I do to push through, jump over, toss aside, or take a detour away from five of my personal roadblocks in order to stay on track.

Roadblock #1: Perfectionism

Striving to be perfect was always my biggest challenge. My business associates and partners loved giving me projects because I would pull out all the stops and become completely devoted to getting it done… and done right.

It didn’t matter to me how much time or energy I had to spend – my pride demanded perfection.

What I finally learned was:

• My perception of perfection was usually more than what was expected.

• The last 10 percent of a project – the time it takes to get things “perfect” – takes just as long to complete as the first 90 percent.

• Project goals change all the time. So it’s better to come within 90 percent of my idea of perfection and save a little time for the inevitable changes.

For example, I used to design Group Health Plan documents for self-insured accounts. I would toil for hours on end, double-check with the client on her vision, and present the “perfect” document… only to hear something like this: “Great job, Bob! But there’s a different direction we want to go in regarding certain areas of the benefit design.”

It didn’t matter that I had listened and incorporated exactly what the client said she wanted. It didn’t matter that I had researched a mountain of data to figure out how I could achieve her initial vision. The project wasn’t complete, and more work needed to be done.

Bottom line: Stay in motion. Aim for good, push through the modifications that arise, and then… aim for better and repeat the process until the desired results are achieved.

Roadblock #2: Failure to Compromise

This is a roadblock to my success that still creeps up on me, though it doesn’t happen as often as it used to.

I was a real know-it-all. A jerk. I had little patience for anyone who didn’t want to do everything my way. But this attitude only served to alienate others. And often those were people who could have helped me on important projects.

Now when I’m working with someone who wants to do a project in a way that’s different from the way I would do it, I ask myself:

• Is this legal?

• Will this is in some fashion move my goal forward?

• Can I honor this request?

If I can answer YES… then I’ve taken an appropriate detour around this roadblock. That detour – known as compromise – really comes in handy. And it doesn’t work only at the office. It works really well at home. (Just ask my wife, Karin.)

Roadblock #3: Lack of Listening Skills

I can become easily distracted if the person I’m listening to is taking a long time to make a point. But when I remind myself to use active listening skills, I am able to toss aside this roadblock.

Through the years, I have developed the following tips to help me do that:

• Your ears are for hearing… your mind is for listening.

• Listen for ideas and central themes (even take notes).

• Don’t interrupt. Wait your turn to speak.

• Circle any points in your notes that you want to emphasize when it’s your turn.

• Judge content… not delivery.

Roadblock #4: Reluctance to Ask Others for Help and Ideas

I used to think it was a sign of weakness to ask for help on a project. I was wrong. It only slowed me down in achieving my goals… and created an unnecessary roadblock.

It’s better to have a “suggestion box” mindset. In other words, to be willing to ask for and receive help, including alternate ideas and solutions, from all those involved. I often ask for input even from people who are not involved.

You will be surprised at how many good ideas other people have.

And don’t forget to thank them. By developing this success habit, you will have lots of extra resources to draw on whenever you’re stuck on a problem.

Roadblock #5: Not Understanding the Team Concept

Here is where my know-it-all attitude would set up another roadblock for me. You see, whenever I was involved in a project… I always wanted to be the team leader.

I finally recognized that there are people who are better than I am (go figure!) to lead particular types of projects. It was a tough truth to swallow. But once I accepted it, it made a big difference.

Case in point: The safety meetings I attend for one of my insurance clients. In the old days, I would insist on being the presenter. After all, safety was my business, and I was an expert in claim-related safety issues. But the new Bob lets another guy, Kenny, chair these meetings.

Kenny is clearly more qualified than I to do this – and he does an amazing job. He has over 20 years in that particular industry, which gives him an edge (over me) in knowing how to talk to the managers and relate to the manager mindset.

I urge you to jump over this roadblock by letting someone else lead when the opportunity presents itself. Let another team member head the project, let your spouse call the shots for your next dinner party, or let your joint venture partner negotiate an important contract. When you do, you’ll realize how much you can learn by taking on the role of his or her assistant.

In addition to the above, you may have roadblocks of your own that you encounter on a regular basis. Here’s a simple three-step process to help you navigate through them and keep yourself on the path to success.

1. List three of your personal roadblocks to success. BE HONEST. It’s difficult to admit your “shortcomings” or “issues,” but that’s the only way this technique will help you.

2. Write two or three paragraphs about why these roadblocks are a problem for you and how they are inhibiting your success.

3. List at least three ways to push through, jump over, toss aside, or take a detour away from these roadblocks that keep holding you back from achieving your goals.

[Ed. Note: You can turn your dreams into reality just by implementing a few simple techniques. Success mentor Bob Cox has dozens of powerful strategies that can help you accomplish your longest-held goals. Discover how to get his proven advice and time-tested goal-setting program right here.]

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Make 2009 Your Best Year Ever – Resolution #3: Just Say Yes

Wednesday, December 24th, 2008

On very rare occasions, I like to unwind in front of the TV with an episode of Law and Order. In one of my favorite episodes, Assistant District Attorney Jack McCoy was enticed to take on a high-profile case, but he refused. You see, the case involved working against his boss, District Attorney Adam Schiff. When asked why he refused, Jack said, with a wry smile, “There were many reasons to say yes and one better reason to say no.”

That phrase has stuck in my mind. And I believe it can be a potent reminder to stay the course when working toward your goals.

Yes, achieving your goals can be difficult. It can be time-consuming and frustrating. At times, you may feel like throwing in the towel – and that’s when you need to remember Jack McCoy. There are many reasons to quit, but there is one better reason to keep going.

I’ve had my share of failures. But I’ve had even more successes in my life. And those happy accomplishments were often dependent on how fervently or how often I said “YES!” to moving forward.

Why make goals for yourself if you know you’re going to feel like quitting? That’s a good question. You need to take a good hard look at what you want to get out of life. Then realize that setting goals can actually help you get past those negative feelings and achieve success.

• Goals give you a clear starting point.

Let’s say you are sick of feeling winded every time you climb the stairs. You’re tired of wearing extra-large clothes. And you want to feel attractive again. So set a goal for yourself. Resolve to lose 20 pounds in 2009. Just setting that goal gives you a jumping-off point for feeling healthier, more attractive, and better about yourself.

Not only that, but setting the goal gives you a blueprint for how to achieve it. Once you know you want to lose 20 pounds this year, you can break that bigger objective into smaller, easier-to-achieve chunks: Lose 10 pounds by June, lose 5 pounds by March, and so on.

And once you accomplish the goal, you’ll find that it “transforms” into a new goal – a starting point for maintaining the weight loss and/or becoming even more fit and healthy.

• Goals help you define what is important.

It’s always easier to accomplish things that are important to you. Simply setting goals for yourself is a great way to announce – to yourself and the world – what’s meaningful and significant in your life.

Starting your own business this year says “Financial independence is important to me.” Losing 20 pounds says that you take your health seriously. Joining a family bowling league says that your family means a lot to you.

• Goals help you set priorities.

One you’ve chosen a goal that’s important to you, that goal will dictate your priorities.

Let’s say your primary goal is to start your own Internet business this year. That makes it a top priority in your life. So instead of going out for drinks after work, you might work on your website. Instead of sleeping in on Saturday morning, you might write your weekly e-newsletter. Instead of saying yes to dinner with that couple you hate, you can spend time on creating a new information product.

Your goal moves to the top of your list of responsibilities, and takes precedence over everything else.

As I said earlier, it’s not easy to do what you have to do to reach an important goal – and there will be times when you’ll be tempted to quit. But you have a better reason to keep going: the amazing feeling of – finally! – accomplishing it.

Here’s a story from my personal experience…

I would sometimes dream of going to an airport, hopping on a plane, going down the runway, and soaring into a clear blue sky.

I had this dream several times a year for more than 20 years, and I often thought about it. Then one July morning I woke up, realized my 56th birthday was a few days away… and I had a compelling urge to turn my dream into reality.

So off I went to a nearby FBO (Flight Base Operations) airport to sign up for flying lessons. My wife, Karin, had tried to stop me. “Bob,” she said, “it’s raining. Why don’t you go tomorrow?”

Not a chance! My decision had been made and a new goal (to obtain a private pilot license) was set. I wasn’t going to put it off any longer. The rain was irrelevant!

It took me almost eight months, and involved more time, money, sweat, and tears than I ever imagined. Yet I stayed the course and didn’t quit – even when quitting made good sense. After all, I was surrounded by young pups (students and flight instructors in their early 20s). I had absolutely no background in aviation or engineering. How was I going to be able to understand the instrument panel? Flying an airplane is not like driving a car. You don’t just turn the key and go.

On March 17, 2006 I took my FAA check ride and passed. Karin was at a Spring Training baseball game when I called with the joyous news. I could hear the crowd cheering for a home run, and I felt like they were cheering for me.

My initial goal to get a private pilot license then transformed into new aviation-related goals that I continued to pursue. I had no idea when I started that I would eventually own my own airplane and set two world airspeed records.

It began with a recurring dream. The dream turned into a goal – something that was important to me, no matter how much time and energy I had to devote to it. And it ended with the realization of a 20-odd-year fantasy.

What about you? Do you want to learn to play a musical instrument and give a recital? Do you want to enjoy working in your garden and create a hybrid rose named after you? Do you want to write a collection of poems? Do you want to build or buy your dream home?

Start on that goal now… and don’t give in to all the reasons that will come up for quitting. Turning your dream into reality is the one better reason to say YES.

[Ed. Note: Success mentor Bob Cox - who has worked with four billionaires during his career - strongly believes that setting goals can help you make your longest-held dreams come true. Learn 3 more powerful but surprisingly simple success strategies from Bob Cox right here.

Bob can also give you the "insider secrets" that helped four Average Joes become billionaires. Best of all, you can master these billionaire success techniques in just 30 days. Learn more here.]

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How to Find the Jingle Bell Spirit

Saturday, December 13th, 2008

I used to gripe about the “inconvenience” of the holiday season. Too often, I felt that my work goals suffered because people I needed to get in touch with were simply not available. It sometimes seemed like everyone I wanted to talk to was taking a long lunch break to do Christmas shopping or had left work early to get ready for an office Christmas party.

It took me way too long to realize how important it is for our sense of well-being to allow ourselves to partake in all the joys of the holidays.

Let In the “Jingle Bell” Spirit

I believe that any system you don’t embrace will ostracize you. And the relaxed attitudes in the workplace and loss of production that go along with the holiday season are part of a system I wasn’t embracing. So I was getting left out. And it was all of my own doing.

For too many years, while my partners, coworkers, and friends were planning joyous occasions and enjoying time with family… I was in a foul mood. Meetings were cancelled, projects were delayed, and my timeframes were adversely affected.

I was on a mission (achieving my business goals), and to heck with the holidays.

Eventually, I realized that my approach was limiting my success. I had been oblivious to the reality that the holidays DO change people’s normal schedules and – to some degree – their thinking. Everyone wants to spend additional time with family and friends.

Yes, maybe a coworker was taking a few days off because his kids had come home from college for the holidays. But did I really need to let that throw me off? Would it matter if I had to wait another day or two to receive the information or schedule the meeting? Of course not.

The eureka moment for me came when my wife Karin let me in on a little secret. (Actually, almost everybody knew it but me.) “Bob, you are bucking a system, and you can’t win!” she said. “Besides, you are missing unique opportunities to refuel your emotional well-being.”

Suddenly, it all made sense (especially since she first put in a Bing Crosby recording of holiday music to set the mood).

From that day forward, I vowed to let “der Bingle” fill me with some jingle bell spirit. And, quite truthfully, I have become a better person, husband, father, friend, neighbor, and coworker because of it!

How can YOU not miss out (like I used to) on the joys and wonders of the upcoming holiday season?

Create Your Own Holiday Vision Statement

Every business has a mission – a mission that it often shares with its employees and clients through a “vision statement.”

When done right, it puts everyone on the same page: Clients know what to expect when they hire the company, and employees know what they need to do to get the job done… and why it’s important.

The same principles can be applied to creating your personal Holiday Vision Statement.

1. Begin at the beginning.

The best way to begin to put together any mission or personal vision statement is to ask yourself questions. What is expected of me during the holidays from my family, friends, and coworkers? What priorities are important to me? What community activities do I want to participate in? How can I reflect the best of myself during the holidays to those around me? How can I apply myself to yield the best results?

2. Bring in those that matter.

There is no reason for you to do this alone. Bring in your spouse or significant other, children, friends, and other family members to help you plan your holiday mission. You could do this by phone, via e-mail, or by holding a group meeting. You might even encourage them to create their own holiday vision statements or work together to create a Family Holiday Vision Statement.

It may take some time to make those calls or send off those e-mails or set up a family meeting. However, the benefits will be well worth it. You will get a lot of great input. And you will end up with a statement suited for your personal objectives that also takes into account the thoughts and feelings of people who matter to you.

3. Make a rough draft.

Once you have everyone’s input, as well as your own answers to the questions you asked yourself, you’ll be ready to draft your personal Holiday Vision Statement. And it only needs to be a few paragraphs. Here, I’ll even get you started…

My goal this year is to enjoy the holidays! To that end, I choose to embrace a holiday mindset of being ready for the joys and wonder of the season…

4. Polish it to shine like a star.

When you complete your draft, I want you to polish it over and over until it shines like the star atop a beautifully decorated Christmas tree. You could even circulate it by e-mail to everyone who helped you with it, or hold another family meeting to discuss it.

5. Post it.

Whether you write out your Holiday Vision Statement by hand, hammer it out on your old typewriter, or use your computer, I encourage you to post a copy in a place where you will see it often throughout the day: on your refrigerator, on your wall calendar at work, and/or on your computer’s desktop.

Your Holiday Agenda

I want you to have some fun this holiday season… especially with your family. And make sure every family member gets involved in making it a great time for all. Pop up some popcorn or make hot chocolate and sit at the dining room table with paper and pens. Say “We are going to enjoy the holidays this year. What are your ideas?”

Here are some ideas to consider:

• What can we do in the community this year? Visit a nursing home, participate in the church choir, sponsor a toy drive?

• What can we do to stick with a realistic holiday budget? Could we go online to find deals or stop by a local crafts store for ideas on making gifts instead of buying them?

• Do we want to make plans for family visits, travel, or hosting a party? If so, who is going to do what?

• What school, work, or neighborhood events are we attending this year?

You’re getting the idea, right? The holidays are going to happen anyway, so why not begin them with a joyful mindset and take advantage of the opportunities that are unique to this time of year? If you are open and receptive… good times will happen. Even more important, you’ll remember those good times forever.

A final thought: Don’t forget to enjoy holiday working, too! The holiday spirit at work can be infectious if you are in the right mood.

I am not condoning abandoning your responsibilities. Not in the least. I am advocating expanding your goal to enjoy the holidays this year to include the workplace – to bring your newfound Jingle Bell Spirit to your coworkers, partners, bosses, vendors, and customers. After all, a genuine smile and happy holiday greeting doesn’t cost a penny… but can be priceless to the recipient.

[Ed. Note: Pledge right now that the holidays will be a time of joy rather than stress. Share your own Holiday Vision Statement here.

For more of success expert Bob Cox's advice on how to achieve your goals, check out his "Flip the Success Switch" guide. Learn how to get your copy here.]

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How to Keep Your Promises

Monday, November 24th, 2008

Let’s say you are organizing your company’s big end-of-year conference. You’ve invited 50 of your company’s best clients and 25 prospective clients. If all goes well, the conference could bring in millions of dollars in sales.

You put together a team of people to help you with preparations. And you interview a dozen more before choosing “Jeff” to handle all the event details. He makes a very compelling pitch. He knows the best audio-visual teams in town. He has contacts with the best caterers. And he knows the perfect designer to create your banners and signs and brochures.

You check in with Jeff every week – and each time, he assures you that the planning is right on schedule…

But you start to get worried when you aren’t seeing results. Turns out, Jeff is swamped with other events he has to plan… and he’s pushed yours to the bottom of his pile. With only a few weeks left, you fire Jeff and find someone new. Of course, there’s no way you’ll hire him again – or recommend him to anyone else.

Building a solid reputation (in business or personally) requires diligent and consistent action. It can blow up in an instant. No matter your past accomplishments, one unfortunate incident can ruin it all.

And it doesn’t take a major violation – stealing, embezzlement, or fraud – to call your integrity into question. Distrust raises its ugly head in small ways, too. And breaking a promise – whether it’s failing to follow through on a project or canceling a lunch meeting at the last minute – is dishonorable in its own way.

MaryEllen Tribby, Publisher and CEO of Early to Rise, recently wrote about a lunch meeting she’d set up with a former protege who had moved on to start her own consulting business. MaryEllen made time in her busy schedule for the appointment. Yet, while making a routine follow-up call to confirm the date, she found that the young woman had forgotten about it completely. She’d never even put it on her schedule. Needless to say, MaryEllen’s opinion of her took a nosedive.

A scheduled appointment is an obligation to be taken seriously. You cannot build a solid reputation if you honor only the commitments that are convenient for you… yet expect others to honor all of theirs.

Promises mean a lot. They suggest appreciation, value, empathy – and, when fulfilled, give pleasure. In a very real sense, promises are a time-debt to be paid. If you create the obligation (promise), it is a debt you must honor.

Here are some techniques for keeping yours…

Promise-Keeping Technique #1: Make your promises sparingly.

Think twice before making too many promises.

Promise-Keeping Technique #2: Make realistic promises – promises that you are capable of completing.

It is easier to keep a promise when it involves doing a small task. But even if the task is larger and harder to finish… it’s still a promise.

Promise-Keeping Technique #3: Make promises that are important – to you.

Ask yourself, “Will this promise keep me on track for completing my goals? Will honoring this promise advance my career?” If there is no value in the promise for you, it will be easier to break.

Promise-Keeping Technique #4: Make your promises honestly.

If you are making promises simply to please people… you will end up over-scheduling yourself and slowing your progress in achieving your goals.

Be honest. Know that breaking promises will erode your trust in yourself. Get in the habit of keeping promises, especially the ones you make to yourself.

Broken promises result in missed opportunities, resentment, and anxiety. Furthermore, broken promises can lead to damaged friendships and loss of business. Everyone loses when you break a promise that the other person was relying on before they can take action.

Most people don’t mind the occasional broken promise, with a reasonable explanation or heartfelt apology. However, the most successful people I know value the promises they make and keep their promises faithfully. It is a matter of integrity and personal honor.

We are all busy. And with time being so limited, nothing is more important than quickly building solid relationships with your coworkers, partners, friends, family, customers, and vendors. Broken promises will destroy your credibility with them.

Promise-Keeping Technique #5: Make and keep ONE promise a day.

I want you to try to honor just one promise a day. If you can do that, in just a year you will have positively impacted 365 people. That is far better than trying to please 10 people a day by making promises you can’t keep and end up pleasing none.

And I want you to make and honor one promise a day to yourself, too. Then watch how a week of seven promises kept… turns into a month of 30 promises kept… and then a year of 365 promises kept. Write them down in your daily planner and put a “star” next to each one kept. By the end of the year you will see a constellation of success… and will have developed a habit that will keep rewarding you throughout your life.

I pride myself on making promises sparingly and keeping them faithfully… including the promises I make to myself. For instance, about three and a half years ago, I set a goal to obtain my private pilot’s license. At the time, I had no idea it would be as hard as it was to accomplish, cost as much as it did, or take so much time to complete.

I had to keep reminding myself that this was a promise to me. I needed to honor that promise to maintain my own self-esteem, so I persevered. (And let me tell you, it was a very lonely and frustrating process.)

However, I did earn my private pilot’s license. Not only that, I purchased an airplane, and I have set two world airspeed records.

When I fly, the feeling of wonder and freedom is at times overwhelming. The joy is indescribable. In fact, my co-pilots and I often say to each other: “Don’t you wish everyone you know and love could have this incredible experience?”

You can achieve almost any goal, personal or professional, you set for yourself. It may take more time than you expect, cost more money, or even challenge your belief in yourself. But you can make it happen. I’ve done it. So can you!

Begin today by making and keeping one promise to another person… and one to yourself.

[Ed. Note: Success mentor Bob Cox - who has worked with four billionaires during his career - strongly believes that keeping promises, to yourself and others, is critical to the achievement of your goals. Learn 3 more powerful but surprisingly simple success strategies from Bob Cox right here.

Bob can also give you the "insider secrets" that helped four Average Joes become billionaires. Best of all, you can master these billionaire success techniques in just 30 days. Learn more here.]

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5 Simple Steps to Staying Focused on Your Goals

Saturday, November 8th, 2008

About eight years ago, I started noticing that other people seemed to be having more fun than I was. And I realized that if I wanted more fun in my life, it was up to me to do something about it.

One thing I did to introduce more fun into my life was to take up golf. I felt it was a natural fit for me. I love the outdoors, I enjoy watching golf on TV, and I consider myself a natural athlete.

If you know me at all, you know I don’t believe in half measures. I applied the same vigor to this new hobby as I apply to my business goals. My action plan included scheduling and taking golf lessons, keeping a journal of swing tips, and buying almost every training aid as soon as I saw it promoted on The Golf Channel.

In the end… after more than 100 golf lessons and with 400+ pages of golf notes and a closet full of training aids… my scores have definitely improved. I don’t think they’ll ever be as good as I would like – still, embarking on my “learn to play golf” goal has yielded many benefits: a mountain of fun memories, new friends, and great experiences. Golf remains an enjoyable challenge.

I’m not telling you this to try to convince you to take up golf. But I do want to encourage you to take action on whatever goals you have set for yourself. Acquiring any kind of knowledge is worthwhile. Yet, that knowledge is absolutely worthless unless you use it to develop a plan, take action, and channel that action into success.

A good approach is to use the following formula:

Dedicate 25 percent of your allotted time to studying.
Dedicate 25 percent of your allotted time to observing.
Dedicate 50 percent of your allotted time to DOING!

And I think you’ll find that the DOING part of the formula is integral to the studying and observing.

In my case, it was easy to assign 50 percent of my time to DOING by taking golf lessons, practicing my swing on the driving range, and practicing chips and putts around the greens. But if I hadn’t dedicated the other half of my time to making notes, thinking and visualizing my game, and observing proper course management, I wouldn’t have gotten much better.

All three elements linked together. I needed all three to be successful. It will be the same for you and the goals you set for yourself.

When you are dedicating yourself to achieving a specific goal, you must promise yourself to use the time you’ve blocked off for it ONLY for working toward that goal. Avoid mental and physical distractions. If, for example, you start thinking about your job, family, friends, or the party you’re hosting next weekend during the block of time you’ve scheduled for learning golf, you’re stealing time from your goal.

It’s easy to let your mind wander away from what you should be focused on doing. In fact, studies have shown that the mind wanders every chance it gets. This has probably happened to you many times. For instance, you could be reading an important financial report and suddenly find yourself thinking about an unpleasant encounter you had earlier in the day.

What to do? Take charge of your brain. After all, it is YOUR brain!

Here are five techniques I have used to get my mind back on track whenever I find it wandering away from the task at hand:

• Check your emotions.

If I’m stewing about something unrelated to what I’m supposed to be working on, I remind myself that “emotions have no cash value.” And I refocus.

• Let it go.

If I’ve done my part and the ball is now in someone else’s court, I remind myself that there’s nothing I can do about it at the moment. And I refocus.

• Take a breather.

To refresh my mind, I take a quick break. Even stopping to get a glass of juice helps me refocus my attention where it should be.

• Keep a notepad handy.

If the distracting thought that pops into my head could be useful – maybe an idea for a solution to a client’s problem – I write myself a note and refocus. That way, I know I won’t forget that idea. I’ll get back to it later, AFTER I’ve finished what I’m doing.

• Reschedule.

When I’m tired my mind tends to wander even more. In that case, unless I am on a tight deadline, I reschedule what I’m working on.

It is far more productive to stay focused on the work you are doing WHILE you are doing it. Although studies suggest that 30 to 40 percent of the time most people don’t really think about what they’re doing, YOU can be different. It takes practice and willingness to discipline yourself to be “in the here and now.” But it is worth it.

[Ed. Note: The only way to achieve success - no matter what you're trying to accomplish - is to take action. Learn 3 powerful but surprisingly simple success strategies from success expert and mentor to billionaires Bob Cox right here.

Bob can also give you the "insider secrets" that helped four Average Joes become billionaires. Best of all, you can master these billionaire success techniques in just 30 days. Learn more here.]

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The OSREAR Success Technique

Tuesday, October 7th, 2008

One of the best ways to accomplish a big project is to get advice from people you respect. But it’s not always easy to go up to a boss or mentor and ask for their ideas. So I’ve developed a technique that can help. I call it the OSREAR Success Technique.

Make it easy for your boss or mentor to help you by breaking down your problem into four parts:

O - the Overview. Start off by writing out “the big picture,” the general problem you are trying to solve. Keep it to one or two sentences.

S - the Snapshot. Outline what’s been done to date to solve the problem. Again, keep it to a few sentences.

RE - the Result Expected. What are you trying to achieve?

AR - the Actual Result. What happened? Where are you now?

When you have finished, you will have defined the problem and your attempts at solving it in a clear, easy-to-understand manner. You can then present this list to others when asking for their assistance.

You’ve made your problem so clear that it should be very easy for them to offer you advice. Once you’ve collected a few suggestions from people you trust, you can develop a plan of action and tackle your problem head-on.

[Ed. Note: Using the techniques that have helped others achieve wealth and success is the easiest way to accomplish your own goals. Discover 189 proven methods for turning your dreams into reality right here.]

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Talents and Abilities Dont Mean Much

Friday, September 19th, 2008

When I was young, my teachers, friends, and family always commented on my natural gifts. I had charm, intellect, athletic skills, and (what a surprise!) little or no modesty. Their words were reinforced by my good grades, awards, and trophies. So I decided that I was one of the “chosen few.” The sun was always going to shine on me.

As I finished high school and started college, I partied with my friends and studied less…. things I thought I could do since I was a gifted “chosen one.” Meanwhile, my contemporaries began to have more success than I was able to sustain. If I was really as smart and clever as I thought I was, I would have figured out immediately that talent and natural abilities are only two ingredients for success. Sadly, it took me several years.

The thing is, there’s no real difference between you and me and the guy on the bus. All of us have the chance to screw up big time – or make it big. Sure, someone else might have more natural talents than you. And someone with fewer talents might have more money or power. That’s because success isn’t a matter of who’s the most talented. It depends on how hard you work and how well you master the simple skills it takes to climb the ladder.

We all have to stretch ourselves and grow regardless of whatever natural talents and skills we possess. Hard work, the willingness to learn, and the ability to form relationships – those are the ingredients that really count.

[Ed. Note: Yes, some people become billionaires while others end up working at low-paying jobs. But that's not because of some fundamental difference in their genes. You can achieve any level of success you want - just by mastering a few simple skills. Learn 30 goal-setting strategies from Bob Cox in as little as 5 minutes a day.] Comment on this article

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Dear ETR How do you get yourself to take action

Wednesday, September 10th, 2008

“How do you get yourself to take action when you just don’t feel like it – even though you know that taking action will probably lead to a positive result?”

Kirk D.

Great question, Kirk! My approach is to talk to myself in the mirror.

No, I am not kidding. Looking into the mirror and having a serious discussion with yourself is beneficial for two reasons:

1. You acknowledge the one person who can solve this problem: YOU – the person in the mirror.

2. Once you start talking to your reflection about what you want to achieve, you will be more likely to remember who is going to benefit from a successful outcome: YOU – the person in the mirror.

It always motivates me.

When the time has come to take action – even if I don’t feel like doing it – I psych myself up by looking in the mirror and saying, “Bob – it’s show time. Just go out there and give it your best.”

I have set a simple standard for myself. I judge my efforts by the enthusiasm I can bring to projects, meetings, and phone calls that I’m not looking forward to. And once I have completed one of those difficult tasks, I reward myself with lunch at my favorite restaurant, a new golf shirt, or an evening out at the movies.

And the next time I look into my friend, the mirror, I say “Mirror, mirror on the wall… you and I are going to accomplish our goals after all!

- Bob Cox

[Ed. Note: Psyching yourself up by talking to yourself in the mirror is a simple way to get motivated. Goal-setting expert Bob Cox can help you achieve practically any goal with dozens of equally easy-to-implement techniques. And none of them takes more than 5 minutes a day to master. Learn more here.

Have a question for an ETR expert? Write to us at AskETR@ETRFeedback.com and we may answer your question in an upcoming issue of ETR.]

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Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Peace

Saturday, September 6th, 2008

You’re at a wedding… at that crucial point in the ceremony when anyone who can show just cause why the couple should not be “united in holy matrimony” is asked to “speak now or forever hold your peace.” I doubt that you’ve ever actually seen someone stand up and give “just cause.” But back in the day when arranged marriages were the norm, it did happen. Often, a dowry was involved. And if that obligation had not been met, the groom’s family could speak up to put a stop to the proceedings.

I didn’t bring up the phrase “speak now or forever hold your peace” because I want to talk about weddings. I did it because I want to convince you to carry it in your head – always – to remind yourself never to speak until the time is right. And the time is right when the other person is ready to listen.

A Common Success Faux Pas You Must Avoid

Why is it so important to wait to speak until the other person is ready to listen? It’s simple. Speaking out of turn, interrupting, or speaking defensively can negatively impact your goals.

Here’s an example of what I mean…

John, the human resources director for one of my consulting clients, was upset. The owner of the company, Mr. B, had cornered him and asked him why they were paying more for a particular service than other people in the same business.

Mr. B owns an insurance franchise that has access to a national insurance program. The renewal rates for insurance companies involved in national programs are based on a variety of factors, including the state they’re in, number of transactions, loss history, and other actuarial considerations. Mr. B believed that he was paying the same (or even less) than the other franchise holders. When he found out that wasn’t the case, he demanded that John make “something” happen to change his perceived slight.

From what John told me, it sounded like he had made the common success faux pas of not speaking up early on – when he first thought this might be a concern for Mr. B. And because he had invested so much time and energy into making the best possible rate deal for Mr. B, he was very defensive when he did speak up.

When Is the Right Time to Speak Up?

Had John asked for my advice, I would have told him to take this approach:

Step 1. Let Mr. B say everything he needs to say. Let him get it all out. And even when you think he’s done, ask him, “Mr. B, is there anything else you want to add? Have you shared all your thoughts with me?”

It’s important not to interrupt Mr. B. At this point, he is not ready to listen to the facts or to your perspective. But, eventually, he will calm down. He will notice that you haven’t said anything, and will ask you to comment.

By not interrupting, you give yourself time to compose yourself instead of immediately – and defensively – reacting. You also give yourself the opportunity to really listen to what Mr. B is saying. (Too often, we assume that we know what the other person is going to say.)

Step 2. Restate the problem so Mr. B knows you understand it. Then ask him if he has any thoughts for a solution.

Be patient. Keep in mind that Mr. B obviously feels very strongly that he is right. Let the man speak.

Step 3. Offer your own suggestions – or politely explain to Mr. B why he may be wrong in thinking he is paying too much.

Mr. B may not initially grasp what you are trying to tell him. But he will settle down. He will become receptive to listening to the facts. Most businessmen want to know what is really going on and what options are available to make a bad situation better.

I had a meeting with John and Mr. B this past week. The primary goal was to bring Mr. B up to speed on where he’s at in terms of the rates he’s being charged by the national insurance company, and to make sure he’s comfortable with the way his claims are being handled by them. But I also wanted to give John some tools to help him communicate effectively with Mr. B in the future.

After all was said and done, Mr. B realized that the rates he’s being charged are, indeed, competitive. Perhaps more important, he came away from the meeting with ideas for things he can do now that will lower his rates when the next renewal comes around.

Meanwhile, John learned more about how to deal with his boss. He understood that when Mr. B started asking questions implying that John wasn’t doing his job, that was not the time for him to say “I object” and begin listing everything he had done to date.

Don’t Take the Bait!

When your boss – a supervisor, manager, team leader, or even the company’s owner – says to you, “Is this all you can do?” my advice is not to take that bait. Your natural tendency will be to become:

emotional
argumentative
aggressive

It’s better to “hold your peace” and calmly respond with something like, “From what I know right now, yes, that’s all I can do. But I will do more research and get back to you as soon as I can.”

Here’s another way to take advantage of the “speak now or forever hold your peace” approach. When you are writing to ask someone to review or respond to a time-sensitive document, take two steps back and add something like the following to your e-mail or letter:

“I look forward to receiving your response by _______ [enter date]. If I don’t receive any additions/corrections to the attached draft by ______ [enter date], I will assume it has your approval and will proceed.”

Caution: Use this approach sparingly… more to cover your bases than to actually nail down the other person. And I wouldn’t recommend using it multiple times to the same recipient. They could see you as:

not fully communicating your thought/ideas/solutions in the first place.
trying to force them into a decision before they are ready.

Still, establishing a time/date boundary draws attention, and that should prompt a faster response. Give it a try. Just remember, it is like salt on a salad… a little goes a long way.

In closing, let me say that if you make “speak now or forever hold your peace” part of your mindset during any negotiation or discussion, you can more easily contribute to a solution instead of adding fuel to the fire.

Remember, nobody likes to receive what they perceive to be bad news – especially people in a position of authority. You don’t want them to feel like they have to “kill the messenger.” Rather, you want to be mindful of success techniques that can help you resolve problems and move your goals (whether they are professional, personal, social, or health-oriented) forward.

[Ed. Note: Knowing when to speak and when to keep your mouth shut is a skill that will serve you well for the rest of your life. Find 30 more success techniques that are just as simple as Bob's "Wedding Ceremony" strategy here.

One of the best ways to discover new ideas that could propel you to success is to meet up with bona fide experts... and follow their lead. This November, you can rub shoulders with some of the world's greatest entrepreneurs. And all of them are very accessible, despite their legendary accomplishments. Who knows? They may accidentally spill some of their top insider secrets to add another zero or two to your bottom line. For access to this exclusive opportunity... continue here]

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The Urgency Conundrum

Wednesday, August 27th, 2008

A business associate of mine used to fax me on a regular basis. (This was before e-mail.) And every darn fax said URGENT at the top in big bold letters. At first, I found it curious. And then, it became annoying.

Come on. Was every fax of his urgent? Of course not. And what was the result? I stopped giving any of them my immediate attention.

Being overly urgent is not the most effective approach to accomplish your goals. You see, people – especially people who may be in a position to help you – get tired of everyone wanting everything done today (or yesterday) just because they want it. So if, for example, you are always demanding that your projects be completed now, now, now – even when they don’t deserve that priority treatment – people will quickly learn to resent and/or ignore your demands.

Sure, you can sometimes achieve faster results by labeling them “urgent.” But do it too often, and you will simply alienate those involved. You can’t expect to keep getting bumped to the head of the line.

Have consideration for other people. Your spouse, colleagues, co-workers, joint-venture partners – anyone you deal with regularly – have a “rhythm” to their day. And when they incorporate you into their schedule, doesn’t it make good sense for you to make that a pleasant (as opposed to stressful) experience?

By recognizing that many people won’t feel a need to respond to your urgent requests, it becomes your responsibility to motivate them to get whatever it is that you want done in a timely manner. You don’t want to be a tyrant, but you don’t want to be a pushover either.

You can also apply this kind of thinking to your personal goals, whether you’re learning how to play the piano, taking French lessons, or creating an Internet business. If you treat every step of your new venture as urgent, you’ll burn yourself out. To achieve the best results, work each step into a specific important-but-not-urgent time slot in your schedule.

[Ed. Note: Accomplishing your dreams - even the big ones - doesn't have to be overly complicated. Simple steps - like limiting the number of "urgent" requests you make - can help you achieve almost any goal. Learn how to get 30 more easy-to-implement goal-setting strategies right here.]

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How to Find the Lighter Side of Life

Saturday, August 16th, 2008

“I am serious, so I laugh a lot. You need to laugh. You don’t laugh enough. I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t laugh.”

Maya Angelou

Whether you are trying to build a business… lose 20 pounds… learn French… or get that promotion you’ve been eyeing, you’re working hard to achieve something meaningful to you. You take that goal very seriously. And you should. You should work hard and be diligent.

But there’s one other thing you need to do: You need to lighten up. So today, I’m going to help you do that.

I’m not suggesting that you should laugh and shrug off any problems that come up. I’m just saying that you should be a little more flexible in the way you deal with them. You see, it is far too easy to become rigid in our thinking and the way we approach any challenge. Maintaining a sense of humor helps us get beyond that rigidity.

The value of humor is almost a “no brainer” when you think about it. It can help you get out of a tough spot… reduce tension… and put you in a more relaxed frame of mind. Simply put, when you learn to lighten up, the achievement of almost any goal will go more smoothly.

For way too long I was too rigid in pursuing my goals. I didn’t see it at the time, but this actually affected my ability to achieve them – the exact opposite of what I intended by being so serious.

A few years ago, for instance, I got caught up in my desire to complete a particular project on time and on budget. The accomplishment of that mission dominated my mind to such an extent that my team members did not enjoy working with me – and the project wasn’t getting done.

After enough negative feedback on my obsessiveness, I realized that I was the problem. I recognized that I wasn’t saving the planet or doing brain surgery… so I needed to step back and lighten up.

Once I did, we all started to enjoy the work. The lighter side of me brought tons of creative input and ideas to the table. And when the project was completed, there was an abundance of smiles and high-fives.

My sense of accomplishment was sweeter because of the camaraderie. And things kept getting better after that initial success. The entire team was on board and looking forward to our next goal to tackle, because the experience of working together had been so rewarding.

It’s a surprising and powerful revelation: You can make any process more productive and enjoyable when you lighten up on yourself and others.

If you find that you have a hard time giving up your serious side, even after you give it a good try, I’ve come up with five tips to help you.

Lighten Up Strategy #1: Don’t take everything so seriously.

Yes, life is serious. But in most cases, it’s only as serious as you want to make it.

When, for example, you are in a meeting where everyone around the table is offering ideas… don’t automatically shoot down any that seem silly or trivial. Be generous in your response, and really listen to everyone’s input. The team member who didn’t have a good idea in the morning may come back with a great one in the afternoon. And you don’t want to discourage them from voicing that great idea later by cutting them off earlier in the day.

Lighten Up Strategy #2: Let go of your need for control.

Nobody can – or should – be in control of everything all the time. Allow yourself to be open to new ideas. If you open up to all the ideas and input that comes to you from others (like the example I gave in Strategy #1), you stand a greater chance of finding the best way to achieve your goal.

It could feel risky at first, but stay with it and watch your progress and productivity grow.

Lighten Up Strategy #3: Be more spontaneous.

Becoming more spontaneous can be challenging if, like me, you enjoy the comfort of routines. Yet I have learned that spontaneity allows for moments of real joy and creativity.

I am much more spontaneous in person than in the written word. It is far easier for me to have a one-on-one conversation or give a speech than to write. However, writing for Early to Rise has helped me open up my “spontaneity gene” – and this has helped me grow.

I start with a blank page and a basic theme for my message. Then I just write. If I get too caught up in “This article must be fabulous” mode, I start to freeze. So I force myself to keep going, knowing that I can go back later and revamp or make changes.

Lighten Up Strategy #4: Smile every chance you get.

This concept is huge!

You always want to make a positive impression on people… and the easiest way to do that is to smile at them. Smile at the grocery clerk when you are checking out. Smile at the waiter or waitress taking your order. Smile at the toll booth operator taking your quarters. And smile at friends, family, co-workers, supervisors, and everybody else you encounter.

Smile even when you’re on the phone. If you are calling someone… start your smile the moment you begin dialing. If you are taking a call… start your smile even before you flip open your cellphone or pick up the receiver. Believe me, that smile will come across in your voice to the other person on the line.

Lighten Up Strategy #5: Don’t forget to play.

You never outgrow your need to play – in order to maintain your sense of humor and, by extension, a full and balanced life. Yet, too often, it is forgotten.

To play is to have fun, be delighted, and experience joy. Play time can be a solo effort or involve others. You might tell jokes, play a board game, have a paper airplane contest… anything that releases tension and gets your positive energy flowing. If you incorporate at least a couple of hours of play time into your weekly schedule, you will find yourself enjoying every part of your life even more.

All five of the above strategies will “power up” your sense of humor and help you embrace your sunnier side while you’re working toward your goals. And once you start enjoying the process, you’ll reach success that much faster. There really is time for humor and fun along the way.

[Ed. Note: Take a tip from Bob Cox: Relax and let go a little bit, even when it comes to your most important goals. Bob's a career goal setter - and he's even helped four men become billionaires. You can get his expert advice and strategies for making your longest-held dreams come true. Learn how right here.]

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“ID Syndrome” – How to Quiet Your Needy Inner Voice

Saturday, July 5th, 2008

I need to e-mail my sister this video of dogs and cats playing. It is so cute, she will love it.

I need to check my favorite sports team website to see who has been traded and all the recent rumors surrounding our star pitcher.

I need to call Bill to set up our golf game for next week.

I need to add to my blog so my readers will be updated on my latest insights into Obama’s campaign.

I need to go online and pick out a gift for Aunt Sarah’s birthday.

I really need to think about where I’m going for lunch and what I’m going to eat.

Do any of the above sound familiar? Of course they do!

I call this "ID Syndrome" – the disease of Internal Distraction. And unless you learn how to defeat this affliction, you won’t get anywhere at work or in life.

We all have personal thoughts like these while we are working. But there’s a big difference between how high achievers deal with them and how people who never do better than the status quo deal with them. You see, high achievers recognize that these thoughts are WANTS – not NEEDS – that should be dealt with outside of the working day.

Here’s a little example of just how problematic internal distractions can become…

Let’s say you are working on a research project for your boss. While searching for the latest sales statistics, you come across an interesting quote that you "need" to send to your brother. And when e-mailing him the quote, you feel the "need" to tell him all about your barbecue last weekend. Once you send the e-mail, you get back to the research project. But, suddenly, the task that you’ve scheduled an hour for has turned into an hour and 15 minutes.

When this happens, it leaves you with one of two options for the rest of the tasks you’ve scheduled for the day.

Option A: You could reduce the time you’ve allocated for the next thing on your to-do list. (Which is all too easy to do if that task is not one of your favorites.)

Option B: You could stay an extra 15 minutes at the end of the day to complete your scheduled tasks.

These options might not sound too bad, but neither is desirable. Option A steals time from a task you have committed to and set aside time for. Option B reduces time with your family and friends – time that is important to maintain balance in your life. Plus, allowing 15 minutes to disrupt your day is one thing, but imagine what would happen if you went 15 minutes over on every task.

Internal distractions may seem innocuous. But they can completely derail your schedule and put you off track.

Fortunately, it’s pretty simple to eliminate them and be more productive during every working hour.

What you have to do is regulate your internal distractions by training your subconscious mind to honor your commitments and stay on schedule.

Here’s how:

1. Set aside time in your schedule that DOES NOT intrude upon the time you’ve allocated for specific work and goal-oriented tasks.

Use that time to do such things as searching for a new book to read, catching up on sports scores, or setting up a coffee date with your best friend. Consider using part of your lunch hour or a few minutes in the evening to take care of these personal tasks.

2. Train your subconscious mind that you have set aside specific times for your personal tasks – time that’s separate from work.

This is key! Don’t allow your personal activities to distract you from your other responsibilities.

3. When working on your personal tasks, do not let other work or goal-oriented tasks intrude.

Make sure you spend the time you’ve set aside for personal tasks ONLY on those tasks. In other words, compartmentalize your time. Set aside a specific time for each task and honor the time assigned.

When you’re tackling a personal task that you’ve scheduled, don’t let your mind wander. And when you’re doing a work task or working toward one of your long-term goals, direct your subconscious mind to stay in the moment. Say to yourself, "Stop. I am not dealing with that now. I have scheduled X time to take care of it. Right now, I need to concentrate on the task at hand."

External distractions – a broken water pipe, a sick child, a construction site setting up outside your office – are often outside of your control. Internal distractions are of your own making and, therefore, within your control. Begin to use the techniques outlined above and you will see the difference.

Staying on schedule can feel restrictive, especially if you’re not used to doing it. But it is the best way to stay productive and complete all the tasks on your to-do list.

You will find that when you use your time more productively, you’ll have more focus, and you’ll limit your level of anxiety.

[Ed. Note: It's entirely possible to accomplish every goal you set for yourself. But you don't have to do it alone. With your own "Personal Life Coach," you can get expert guidance every step of the way. And you can "hire" your own for a full year - for less than most life coaches charge per hour. Learn more here.]

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The Insidious Character Flaw That Could Double the Time It Takes You to Succeed

Saturday, May 31st, 2008

When I retired in the year 2000, I did not accept any consulting work until I had taken time to reflect on my career and how I could have made success come easier. My one complaint was that I felt I had worked too many hours to achieve it.

After considerable thought, I had a revelation: I was a diehard perfectionist and my perfectionism had doubled the time it took me to be successful!

My partners and associates often commented, "Bob, you are a great detail guy. We love your reports. We can always count on you to strive for perfection." I wore those comments like a proud war veteran who had been awarded medals.

The truth is, those "medals" were a millstone around my neck and were slowing me down. It took me years, but I finally realized that perfectionism is a time-wasting, money-losing goal killer.

It is amazing that it took me so long to realize that it’s more productive to "aim for good" and then "aim for better" than trying to be perfect every time.

Is perfectionism keeping you from accomplishing your goals?

Have you ever said anything like:

"I must find the perfect gift for my sister’s wedding."

"This report has to be perfect before I turn it in."

"I have to make sure my presentation is perfect before I meet with this client."

The sad truth is, nothing is perfect. Striving for perfection is foolish – and it’s impossible to reach. So trying to make things perfect can prevent you from ever achieving the things you want to accomplish.

The other nasty thing about perfectionism is that it can stall you – keep you treading water instead of progressing. In other words, if you’re always trying to make your novel perfect, you’ll never get it published.

Keep in mind that you are a work in progress. So, too, are your goals… works in progress. If you never start on them… you can never benefit from the results.

Beating perfectionism is tough work. And sometimes the very thought that you aren’t doing something "perfectly" can stop you in your tracks and stomp on your motivation.

The Slump Buster

If you feel your energy level sliding, or if you are losing your motivation, here’s a simple strategy that will help you get back in the game.

Maintain a list of small, meaningful tasks that need doing – things like replacing a light bulb, writing a letter, or returning a phone call. Take out your list when you feel a slump coming on and take care of one of those tasks. You will be out of your slump by the time you have completed it.

Why? Because you will have "stepped back" to catch your breath. Plus, accomplishing even small tasks is energizing. Results are always good!

Don’t let perfectionism be a trap or hold you back from working toward your goals. If, for example, you have to get a winning sales letter in the mail to achieve one of your business goals, the only thing you can do is take a shot at writing it. Write your letter and test it. Aim for good. Once you receive the test results, you will be ready to aim for better, because you will have more information to work with.

Here’s another "trick" for keeping perfectionism at bay: Apply the 90 percent rule to every task you take on.

Let’s say you have been slaving away at a project. You’ve been putting in long hours, and wearing yourself out. As a result, you are beginning to neglect your other job responsibilities – and even your health. This is a definite sign that you are being a perfectionist. It’s time to put the 90 percent rule to work.

Say to yourself, "Have I achieved 90 percent of what I was aiming for with this project? If not, I will continue to work on it. If so, I move forward."

Now this doesn’t mean that you don’t pour 100 percent of your energy and attention into important tasks. It just means that you stop trying to perfect every tiny detail.

It took me 25 years to learn the 90 percent rule. Do not wait that long to take advantage of this time-saving, money-making, and goal-achieving insider secret.

I stopped striving for perfection because it was too time-consuming and limiting. Had I implemented the 90 percent rule much earlier, I would have completed far more projects a lot quicker.

To this day, keeping my perfectionism under control is hard. However, when I consider "the bigger picture," I know that I have to push to move my goals forward. That’s why, for the past seven years, this has been my rule: 90 percent means good to go!

Don’t waste time and energy striving for perfect. Do the best you can. Then take time later to fine-tune your work. As Michael Masterson always says, "Ready, Fire, Aim."

[Ed. Note: You can change your life and accomplish all your goals with simple strategies like Bob's 90 percent rule. For dozens more ways to achieve your dreams - plus tons of goal-setting tools and motivation to get going - sign up for ETR's Total Success Achievement Program. Learn more here.]

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6 Steps to Making a Good Impression… Every Time

Saturday, March 29th, 2008

Remember when you were a freshman in high school? When you were headed out on a first date, what was your main concern? I’m guessing wanting to make a good impression ranked high on your list.

So to prepare for making that good impression, you may have gotten a haircut… put on a new outfit… practiced a few witty remarks… and reminded yourself to smile at your date as much as possible.

If you think about it, preparing to make a favorable first impression is something you do all the time. You do it when you interview for a job, meet potential clients, have that first dinner with your fiance’s parents, and in many other situations.

Making a good first impression begins with a conscious decision to put your best foot forward. And then, whenever and wherever possible, you must make the effort to live up to that first time.

When you stop deciding to put your best foot forward and quit making the effort, your image will suffer and your financial or social goals will go off track. And here’s a harsh truth: It is much harder to reclaim a favorable impression than to sustain one.

Let’s say you applied for a job and are confident you made an excellent first impression on the Human Resources director. You wore your best suit, you researched the company to prepare for your interview, and you were courteous and friendly when you met. You promptly followed up the interview with a thank-you note. You are happy, thinking you have done all you can to secure the job. So you begin arranging your life around the job offer you know is forthcoming. However, it never arrives. Instead, you receive: "We selected another candidate. Thanks for your interest."

What happened? Maybe you were rude to the director’s secretary. Maybe the handwriting on your thank-you note was illegible or your resume was full of typos. You may have been well-prepared and well-dressed. You may have had all the right answers during the interview. But if you made other impressions that didn’t measure up, that great first impression you worked so hard on is gone.

Successfully achieving your goals includes having people think well of you over and over again. To maintain and reinforce a positive first impression, follow these simple guidelines:

Know what you want from each new encounter.
Greet everyone with a smile. Smiling relaxes people and draws them to you.
Feel positive about yourself – and look like you do. Whenever I have to make a good impression, I say to myself "It’s show time!" and put on my happy face.
Use your friendly voice. Saying "Hi, nice to meet you" with enthusiasm goes a long way.
Extend your hand first, and give a firm handshake. I have met people who shake hands so weakly that all I can think is "What are they afraid of?"
When having a conversation, lean slightly forward. This shows that you are interested in what the other person is saying.

But it’s not only important to make a good first impression. You have to make a good second impression too.

Here’s a personal story that illustrates what I mean…

I became a private pilot in March 2006. That was one of my proudest personal achievements.

There are a small number of flight schools in my area. I went down to the closest one to check it out. They seemed legitimate: They had quite a few students. They had training airplanes for their students. And they had an adequate staff to meet my needs. Based on the limited research I had done, I determined that their price was fair. Overall, I got a good first impression.

It was the second impression that didn’t make it.

You see, during the course of my training, I started noticing things that made me uncomfortable about the way they did business. For example, though they really wanted as many training planes in the air as possible (because that’s how they made their money), they appeared to neglect such vital things as maintenance and customer satisfaction.

I continued despite my discomfort. Eventually, I completed my training. After the FAA check ride, I earned my private pilot’s license. However, since that day, I have not gone back to lease one of their airplanes or take lessons for advanced certification. Although I achieved my personal goal (attaining my private pilot’s license), the negative "second impression" the school left on me prevented them from achieving what should have been their primary goal: to turn me into a long-term customer.

When a private pilot receives his license, the learning process is only beginning. I still had a lot of money to spend on completing my education.

I found another training school, have since purchased my own airplane, and use this new flight facility for all my aviation needs. To my delight, this has been an extremely rewarding experience. I enjoy spending my time (and money) at an establishment that exhibits a warm, welcoming, and supportive environment.

The contrast is shocking. Both businesses make the effort to give off a good first impression… but only one works to maintain that good impression every time. And – not surprisingly – I prefer to patronize the company that cares about making a positive impression over and over again.

Keeping yourself in the best possible light isn’t always easy. But, as I said, it’s harder – maybe even impossible – to restore a tarnished image.

Remember: Your power to impress or alienate others is a matter of personal choice.

Success is about your willingness to keep the big picture in mind every step of the way. Choose to make that extra effort and go that extra mile. In both the short and long run, you will be happier and accelerate the achievement of your goals.

[Ed. Note: Robert L. Cox is the creator of The Billionaire Way and is the "voice" of ETR's Total Success Achievement program. Get weekly motivational messages and twice-monthly teleseminars full of proven advice to help you stay on track with your goals and push past any obstacles in your path. Learn more here.]

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Bob Cox's Newsletters

Stepping Up

Embracing Your Inner Otter

If You Don’t Know, Don’t Say

What Is Your “Elephant Tether”?

Are You Afraid of Change?

4 Simple Strategies for Maintaining Your Success

How to Make Room for What’s Important With a Simple 5-Second Exercise

What Inspires YOU to Be a Better You?

It’s Not All About You

Money Matters

The “Be Here NOW” Success Technique

Does Investing Your Time Guarantee Success?

Knocking Down Your Mental Blocks

Do Your Personal Goals Take a Back Seat to Work?

Blast Through 5 Roadblocks to Success

Make 2009 Your Best Year Ever – Resolution #3: Just Say Yes

How to Find the Jingle Bell Spirit

How to Keep Your Promises

5 Simple Steps to Staying Focused on Your Goals

The OSREAR Success Technique

Talents and Abilities Dont Mean Much

Dear ETR How do you get yourself to take action

Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Peace

The Urgency Conundrum

How to Find the Lighter Side of Life

“ID Syndrome” – How to Quiet Your Needy Inner Voice

The Insidious Character Flaw That Could Double the Time It Takes You to Succeed

6 Steps to Making a Good Impression… Every Time

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