“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou
Today I’d like to tell you about a simple step you can take to make a huge positive change in both your business and personal relationships … and how much faster success will then start to come to you.
I’m talking about developing a simple but highly important trait: charm and charisma. Make the effort, and you’ll have no trouble following what I call the “Billionaire Way.”
In past ETR messages, we’ve talked about some of the top strategies billionaires use to succeed. For one thing, they know how to create time. For another, they have developed the ability to take in their surroundings more clearly and completely than regular Joes. But there are other things that set billionaires apart from the general population.
For instance, most of them are charismatic individuals – and their charisma is one more reason that they are, well, billionaires.
What is charisma? It is the ability to make other people feel good about themselves. It makes them like you and want to work with you and do things for you. Having that kind of support from the people around you is a huge help.
The good news? Even the shyest people can transform themselves into charismatic charmers – and skyrocket their success – because charisma is a learned skill.
So … how do you do it?
People thirst for acknowledgment and friendship. Show an interest in them and they will think more of you AND want to do more for you.
You have no idea just how powerful this can be. Take an interest in other people’s pursuits, their work, their homes, and their families. Make merry with those who rejoice. Mourn with those who weep. Let everyone you meet feel that you regard him or her as a person of importance.
Try this simple exercise:
Choose three people you don’t normally speak with (perhaps a co-worker, a neighbor, and a vendor). Go up to each one and simply ask how they are today or how their weekend was. Listen to them. Be engaged in what they are sharing with you. If they respond that something hasn’t gone well, be sympathetic. If they tell you about something that went well, be enthusiastic and say “That’s great!”
Develop the habit of doing this regularly and you’ll notice that it becomes easier each time. You start with an attitude of being friendly, interested, and focused on every person with whom you are having a conversation … and, before long, you will be thought of as a charming and charismatic person.
Choose three people that you see often. Think of something each one has done for you recently and make it a point to thank them for their efforts. Tell them how you appreciated their assistance or help in resolving an issue or bringing a project to completion. Tell them what a good job they did, and pay attention to the way they react.
I think you’ll find that, as the saying goes, “Flattery will get you everywhere.”
Billionaires know they can’t build their wealth alone. They learn early on in their careers that taking an interest in those around them helps them get where they want to be.
One billionaire I worked with, for example, owns the largest hotel chain in the southeast. He would have meetings with some of his hourly workers every month, a different group each time.
Imagine how these people felt when they were invited to join “the big guy” for a meeting where they could speak freely about their work, how they were being treated, etc. Having this billionaire show a sincere interest in them had to make them feel special, right?
And this small, thoughtful gesture had a big payoff. The workers returned to their duties with renewed vigor, knowing someone cared about them. Meanwhile, the hotel owner came away from these meetings with some great ideas for how to make some aspect of his business better, easier, or faster.
Michael Masterson has said, “Good business is based on equitable exchanges.” We all want value for our money. Well, we want value for our feelings, too. That’s why learning to value those around you and making them feel appreciated will bring you rewards.
You may be saying to yourself, “Wait a minute. I am not charming, and I don’t know how to be charming … much less charismatic.”
Well, you’re wrong.
Think about it. When you were young, you could usually figure out a way to persuade your parents to give you the car for an important date or buy you some gizmo you “had to” have. Right? Granted, your parents are a bit easier to charm than anyone else – but they allowed you to do it because it MADE THEM FEEL GOOD to do something for you.
Same goes for practically anyone in the business world that you know or will ever meet.
Deep, down inside, you are charming – and you can learn how to bring your charm to the surface more often. All it takes is practice – starting with the above exercises.
Want to know something else that ALWAYS helps? Smiling and being the first to extend the hand of friendship.
You do not have to be best friends with your associates or vendors … or anyone else. However, you do need to convince them that you are sincerely interested in them. And the surest way to do that is to actually be interested in them.
Make the effort to develop your charm and charisma, and you’ll see what a huge difference it makes in both your business and personal relationships … and how much faster success starts to come to you.[Ed. Note: Bob Cox is co-founder of the first TV shopping network and the author of The Billionaire Way.
Listen to his Power Surge Message next Wednesday and multiply your chances of meeting all your goals this year. Join over 700 ambitious Early to Risers in ETR’s Total Success Achievement Program, and we can practically guarantee that you’ll see immediate, measurable results.]