RENT A VHS TAPE AT YOUR LOCAL VIDEO STORE.
Do you remember Blockbuster? Your kids won’t. They’re used to On Demand and Netflix.
RIDE A BIKE WITHOUT A HELMET
And any other dangerous things you can do on a bike. (Note: We’re glad kids are now wearing helmets. This is a good step forward.)
WORRY ABOUT MISSING A FAVORITE TV SHOW
If they can’t record it, they can just stream it.
WRITE IN CURSIVE
Penmanship is no longer emphasized in elementary schools. Why bother? Most kids are typing on their computers by third or fourth grade.
MAKE A MIX TAPE FOR YOUR HIGH SCHOOL CRUSH
Maybe they’ll make a playlist instead.
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USE AN ENCYCLOPEDIA AS A REFERENCE FOR YOUR REPORT
Now that there’s Wikipedia, these books are basically worthless.
USE A TYPEWRITER
At least typing on a keyboard is somewhat similar.
DIAL A NUMBER ON A ROTARY PHONE
A phone that isn’t touch screen? What’s that?
USE A PAPER MAP
Between Google maps and GPS, kids today may never even see a paper map.
TAKE A SCANTRON TEST
Yes, the fill-in-the-bubbles tests that can only be taken with a No. 2 pencil still exist but more and more schools are having kids take tests on computers.
The beloved game is basically dead.
TAKE PHOTOS WITH A FILM CAMERA
They may never order photo prints either.
FALL ASLEEP IN THE TRUNK OF A STATION WAGON
We support the strict seat-belt laws but they make it tough for kids to recline and doze off in the car.
USE PARTY LINE TO DIAL IN MULTIPLE FRIENDS
Why talk when you can Snapchat?
ROAM THE NEIGHBORHOOD WITH A PACK OF WILD KIDS
Not without your mother being able to get a hold of you on your cell phone, at least.
USE A CALL BOX WHEN THE CAR BREAKS DOWN
AAA is just a dial away from the convenience of your car
USE A HANDLE, INSTEAD OF A BUTTON, TO ROLL DOWN THE WINDOWS OF A CAR
They probably also won’t drive a car without AC or power steering.
PLAY ON DANGEROUS PLAYGROUND EQUIPMENT
We don’t miss the broken legs and arms but the old-school equipment was so much fun.
LICK A POSTAGE STAMP
Self-adhesive is something we can all get behind.
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