I have an entrepreneur friend who is an engaging speaker. He always gets high marks on audience evaluations.

On stage, he comes off as quite confident. Watching him, you’d think he was loaded with self-esteem.

In fact, the opposite is true. And at a recent presentation, he let his audience in on this personality “flaw” right from the start.

Now I wouldn’t recommend doing this all the time. If, for example, you are delivering a sales presentation to a room full of businessmen, playing the “low self-esteem card” could backfire. Your listeners might think: “Gee, does this guy need a hug or something?”

But in my friend’s case, it helped him bond with his audience immediately.

Why? Because he was giving a speech at a self-improvement seminar. He knew his audience — and he knew what they would respond to.

His eager listeners almost certainly thought, “WOW! This guy has his own image problem. And yet, he’s accomplished all his goals. If he can do it… so can I!”
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Do you know somebody who seems to have the best luck in the world?

It’s like everything they touch turns to gold. And it doesn’t matter if it’s in their business or their personal life, they just seem to have luck on their side all the time.

I can add myself to that list. Because I consider myself to be EXTREMELY lucky.

I’ve built an eight-figure business, married the woman of my dreams, and have two beautiful daughters who are healthy and happy.

And along the way, I’ve had lots of lucky breaks – things that just sort of “happened” and ultimately made me become more successful. But I just didn’t wait around for luck to find me. I went out looking for it.

Here are three things that have always helped me increase my luck:

1. Get out there. I’ve found that luck stems mostly from opportunities, and the more you put yourself in front of others, the more opportunities you’ll have. So don’t be an introvert. Meet new people. Shake their hands. Look them in the eye and find out more about them. This will increase your luck exponentially.

2. Go with your gut. I can’t count how many times I’ve made an important decision based on a gut feeling and it’s turned out to be the right one. So follow your instincts and go with what you feel is correct. More often than not, you’ll see your luck increase.

3. Grab the silver lining. The most successful people I know don’t wallow in misery when their luck goes sour. They find something positive in the situation and focus on that. And guess what? They always turn their fortunes completely around very quickly. You can do the same.

Those are a few of the strategies I use to bring more luck into my life. Apply them to your life… and watch your own fortunes rise.

[Ed. Note: Rich Schefren - one of the world's best small-business strategists - knows a thing or two about what it takes to be successful. The businesses he coaches have done over $500 million every year - piling up more than $1 billion in sales every two years. Visit his blog to learn how to streamline your business while skyrocketing profits.

For more strategies and techniques for "making" your own luck, check out the Early to Rise Total Success Achievement program. Success mentor Bob Cox will help you achieve all you want in life - in just minutes a day.]

When Norman Vincent Peale wrote The Power of Positive Thinking 60 years ago, he received a stack of rejection slips from publishers.

Dejected, he threw the manuscript into the trash, forbidding his wife to remove it. She didn’t.

The next day, however, she took the manuscript, still inside the wastebasket, to a publisher who accepted it. The book became a foundation of the human potential movement, selling more than 20 million copies in 47 languages.

Much of Peale’s homespun advice sounds quaint or even amusing to us today. Still, the book did a good job of articulating a basic truth:

To a great extent, you create your world with your thoughts. Most personal achievements begin with an abiding faith that we can and will accomplish them.

Even realizing your goals, however, will not lead to lasting satisfaction. That’s because human wants are insatiable.

Most of us are trapped on what psychologists call thehedonic treadmill. We work to achieve what we desire. Those things satisfy us for a while, but we soon adapt to them and dissatisfaction returns. So next time, we set the bar a little higher…

Our lives can easily become a pastiche of unfulfilled desires. We yearn for a better-paying job, more recognition, greater social status, a newer car, a bigger house, a firmer abdomen, perhaps even a sexier spouse.

Dissatisfaction is not all bad, of course. Desire can motivate us to achieve good things in our lives, too.

But a continual sense of lack creates anxiety. It undermines our satisfaction. Peace of mind eludes us.

Fortunately, the ancient Stoic philosophers had a technique you can use to override the adaptation process and recapture the contentment we seek. It’s called negative visualization.

The technique is to spend some time each day imagining that you have lost the things you value most. Vividly imagine, for example, that your job has just been terminated, that your house – with all your possessions – has burned to the ground, that your partner has left you, or that you have lost your sight, your hearing, or the use of your limbs.

This sounds horribly bleak, I know. But the Stoics were onto something here. They understood that everything we enjoy in life is simply “on loan” to us from Fortune. Any of it – all of it – can be recalled without a moment’s notice.

Epictetus reminds us, for example, that our children have been given to us “for the present, not inseparably nor forever.” His advice: In the very act of kissing your child, silently reflect on the possibility that she could die tomorrow.

The Roman philosopher Seneca advises us to live each day as if it were our last, indeed as if this very moment were our last. He’s not suggesting that you drop your responsibilities and squander the day in frivolous or hedonistic activities. He’s encouraging you to change yourstate of mind.

Maybe you are already living the dream you once had for yourself.

Along the way, however, you became jaded, bored, numb to the blessings that surround you. The goal of the Stoics would be to wake you up, to make you appreciate what you have today.

Some will argue that negative visualization is fine for those who are happy, healthy, and prosperous – but how about the troubled, the less fortunate?

Negative visualization works for them, too. If you have lost your job, imagine losing your possessions. If you have lost your possessions, imagine losing the people you love. If you have lost the people you love, imagine losing your health. If you have lost your health, imagine losing your life.

There is hardly a person alive who could not be worse off. That makes it hard to imagine someone who wouldn’t benefit from this technique.

Adaptation diminishes our enjoyment of the world. Negative visualization brings it back.

It also prepares us for life’s inevitable setbacks. Survivors of tornados, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters, for example, may suffer terribly. Yet afterward, they often tell us that they were just sleepwalking through life before. Now, they are joyously, thankfully alive.

No one should need a catastrophe to feel this way. You can attain the same realization through negative visualization. Moreover, it can be practiced regularly, so its beneficial effects, unlike a catastrophe, can last indefinitely.

Try it and you’ll see. I’ve found it’s perfect for when you’re standing in line or stuck in traffic, time that would be wasted otherwise.

By contemplating the impermanence of everything in your world, you can invest all your activities with more intensity, higher significance, greater awareness.

In sum, Norman Vincent Peale got it half-right. Positive visualization helps you get what you want. Negative visualization helps you want what you get.

[Ed. Note: Alex Green is Investment Director and Chairman of The Oxford Club, and is the bestselling author of The Secret of Shelter Island: Money and What Matters. His new book - described by Michael Masterson as "shockingly good" - explores money, meaning, and the pursuit of the good life. To pick up a copy, click here.]

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Traditional success teachers are big advocates of “affirmations” – repeating statements that you’d like to be true. For example, a classic “affirmation” is: “I am rich.”

Okay. Try it. Say “I am rich.”

What just happened? Did you hear a voice in your head that said: “Yeah, right!”?

The problem with “affirmations” is that they don’t work for most people. Why? Because you’re trying to convince yourself of something you don’t really believe.

Have you ever been persuaded to try “affirmations”… and then had… absolutely nothing happen?

Me too. And about a billion other people.

One morning in April 1997, I was taking a shower and thinking about how the human mind is always in the process of asking and seeking the answers to questions. For example, if I were to ask you “Why is the sky blue?”,your mind would start searching for the answer.

So I asked myself a logical question: “If the human mind is always asking and searching for the answers to questions, why are we told to repeat positive statements we don’t believe? Instead, why don’t we ask ourselves empowering questions – questions that will force us to change our thought patterns from negative to positive in order to answer them?”

Take a statement like “I am rich” – to which the brain replies “Yeah, right!” What’s the empowering question you should be asking instead?

That question might look something like this: “Why am I so rich?”

Try it. Ask yourself “Why am I so rich?”

Do you know what your brain is doing right now? Searching for a positive answer to that question!

The staggering realization I made that morning in April 1997 was that you create your reality in two ways: by the statements you say to yourself and others, and by the questions you ask yourself and others. Until then, no one had fully realized, or shown how to harness, the awesome power of what happens when you change your questions.

I named my discovery The Afformations Method.

The 4 Steps to Creating Afformations That Change Your Life

Step 1: Ask yourself what you want.

You can use a goal you’ve previously written down, or start from scratch. You decide.

Please note that traditional success teachers stop right here. They tell you to “set your goals” and then say “affirmations” in an attempt to convince your brain that you will have what you want… sometime, somehow, somewhere.

Let’s use Brandon from Utah as an example. He wanted to make more money doing something he loved. He was an insurance salesman who’d spent $30,000 on every “how to succeed” program out there, with no results. So for his goal, he wrote: “I want to be all I can be in life.”

Now, the breakthrough step…

Step 2: Form a QUESTION which assumes that what you want is already true.

Forming a question which assumes that what you want is already true is the key to creating Afformations that change your life.

Your life is a reflection of the subconscious assumptions you make. That’s why Step 2 of The Afformations Method is to change your communication with the world inside yourself. Afformations are the fastest, most effective way I’ve ever seen to immediately change your communication with the world inside of you AND the world outside of you.

So Brandon began afforming: “Why am I allowed to be, do, and have all that I want in life?”

Step 3: Give yourself to the question.

The point of Afformations is not to find “the answer” but to ask better questions. When you ask better questions, your mind automatically begins to focus on what you have as opposed to what you don’t have.

Once Brandon began to afform what he wanted, his mind automatically began to search for the answer. He started doing things a little differently and talking to people with new confidence.

Which brings us to Step 4 of The Afformations Method – the one you MUST do to get optimum results…

Step 4: Take new ACTIONS based on your new assumptions about life.

Even though Brandon had spent thousands of dollars on every “how to succeed” program out there, he subconsciously assumed they wouldn’t work for him. So they didn’t.

After reading my book, he realized that this was what was keeping him from what he wanted. So he began to take new action on the very programs that had not worked for him.

He began calling more people. He followed up with more confidence. By focusing on what he had instead of what he lacked, positive results naturally followed.

Once Brandon followed the four steps of The Afformations Method, his sales tripled in 30 days. In less than nine months, his income increased 560 percent and he was named Agent of the Year.

The point of Afformations is not to find “the answer,” but to change your questions. When you follow The Afformations Method, you will form empowering questions that immediately change your subconscious assumptions.

For example, Andrea had been trying to get pregnant for more than a year but had a huge mental block. She thought she didn’t deserve it, her body couldn’t do it, and so on. After her psychologist told her about Afformations, Andrea began asking herself “Why do I conceive so easily?” and “Why am I so fertile?” Within a month, she had a positive pregnancy test. Now she’s asking herself, “Why do I carry my babies full term?”, “Why am I free from morning sickness?”, and all kinds of questions that are making her feel great during her pregnancy.

Omar, a car salesman, was selling one or two cars a month and making less than $600 in commissions. Then he started afforming “Why am I so successful at selling cars?” – and in just two days, he sold four new cars, three used ones, and made more than $1,800.

Judy, a 55-year-old grandmother from Texas, wanted to lose weight but told herself she was too old. In November 2008, she joined my Platinum Weight Loss Club. I recommended that she start asking Afformations like “Why do I lose weight so easily?” and “Why do I love eating healthy foods?” During the holidays, while most of America was gaining weight, Judy lost 24 pounds. And by February 2009, she was down over 30 pounds and feeling fantastic.

Can you see how this process must, by definition, change your life? Using Afformations, you can take conscious control of your subconscious thoughts – change the questions, change your results, and change your life!

[Ed. Note: Noah St. John, PhD, is the author of the new book The Secret Code of Success: 7 Hidden Steps to More Wealth and Happiness (Collins). You can get the first three chapters of Noah's Secret Code Book (free) and connect with other Secret Code readers at www.SecretCodeBook.com. For a free 60-Second Afformations Stress Buster, go to www.iAfform.com.

It's time to take control of your future. Ask yourself "How am I rich?" At least part of the answer may be right here...]

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Success – in all areas of life – loves speed.

Time is your ally when you take action. But time is a two-sided coin. If you hesitate or procrastinate, time becomes your worst enemy. As a general rule, I assume that if I take action perceived problems will tend to disappear – and that the more I hesitate, the more time I give new obstacles to come on the scene.

I don’t recall ever succeeding at something because I got there last.

In the Preface to Stephen M.R. Covey’s book The Speed of Trust, his father, Stephen R. Covey (of Seven Habits fame), states: “My interactions with business leaders around the world have made it increasingly evident that ’speed to market’ is now the ultimate competitive weapon.”

Just think about that for a minute. The ultimate competitive weapon. What a remarkable idea.

In The Speed of Trust, Covey takes a giant step beyond his father’s statement. He not only tells the reader what the greatest catalyst for speed is (trust), he explains how and why it produces speed.

Covey says that where there is a lack of trust, everything takes longer and costs more. And he’s absolutely right. Isn’t it a lot faster and less expensive if you trust someone enough to make a deal on a handshake rather than having to bring in a brigade of problem-finding, fee-building attorneys to cross the t’s and dot the i’s?

On a macro level, the greatest threat to America is not Islamic terrorists. Our greatest threat is loss of virtues – and at the top of the list of decaying virtues is trust. Americans don’t trust religious leaders, they don’t trust schools, they don’t trust corporate chieftains, and, above all, they don’t trust politicians. (I should add that all this distrust has been well earned.)

Covey points out that trust is based on a demonstration of both character (most commonly manifested as honesty) and competence (most commonly manifested in results). It’s possible to trust someone’s honesty but not trust him to deliver results – just as it’s possible to trust someone to deliver results but not trust his honesty. Either way, dealing with such people will slow you down.

I never cease to be amazed by people who repeatedly make adamant promises yet consistently fail to follow through on them. I’ve grown weary of listening to those who always speak in the future tense, saying that they’re going to take care of this or that tomorrow. As one tomorrow rolls into another, my trust in these folks declines at an accelerating pace.

At a minimum, I prefer to hear the present tense – a person telling me that he’s in the process of doing something. Even better is the past tense: “Yes, I’ve done it.” The past tense promotes trust. Words like “Not yet, but…” arouse doubt.

As for demonstrating character, Covey emphasizes that it’s not so much how people act in the presence of others, it’s what they do behind the scenes. (Anyone who doesn’t understand why this is so probably isn’t curable.) But if they have a hidden agenda, a shrewd person will see it right through the facade they’re hiding behind. You don’t even have to know them to detect the truth.

Do you have a hidden agenda? If so, either trash it or bring it out in the open. If you want to be trusted, you have to play every card face up. Strive for consistency between what you say and do behind closed doors and how you present yourself in public. You simply can’t afford the cost of not doing that.

Finally, there’s that tired cliche about “a level playing field.” I am convinced that nothing does more to level the twenty-first century playing field than trust. Because in today’s world, it’s speed, not size, that carries the day. Trust pays off in high speed and low costs, which gives David the best chance he’s had against Goliath since he aimed a slingshot at him.

[Ed. Note: One of the best ways to build trust with your potential customers is to communicate with them regularly. Learn how to set up an e-mail newsletter and get your Internet business up and running with help from ETR's Internet marketing mentors. Get the details here.  

For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's bestselling dealmaking audio series.

And be sure to sign up for his Voice of Sanity e-letter.]  

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Some time ago, I received an e-mail from one of my readers, John P., about a close call he had while driving when he was 17 years old. Here’s part of what he had to say:

“There was no time to think, only to react. And there was no fear at all, until afterward. It’s like I knew exactly what to do (pull over to the opposite side of the road to avoid the oncoming headlights).

“Remembering back, it was as if I were playing a video game, avoiding a head-on crash. But for the next day or two I was shaking in fear, thinking ‘What if?’ I still think ‘What if?’ and I still have some residual fear.

“Thirty years later, I have a safe driving record, even while driving motorcycles for 20 of those years. (No longer now.) Maybe the one close call at an early age taught me to be careful.

“I believe in free will. And part of me believes I survived that close call because I had strongly chosen to stay alive and healthy. Just as, at other times in my life, I have hurt myself (physically or emotionally), choosing to do so on a subconscious level in order to gain the insight or knowledge that pain teaches.”

The reason John P.’s words caught my attention is because I had an almost identical experience when I was in my early twenties. It was dusk, and I was driving north on a two-lane highway in Kentucky, not far from the Ohio border.

At a distance – perhaps a quarter-mile or so – it appeared that a car was coming toward me on my side of the road. I thought it might just be an optical illusion. Still, I continued to watch the oncoming vehicle with great intensity, just to be sure.

As the distance between us rapidly closed, it became clear to me that the car definitely was on my side of the road – and headed straight at me. I instinctively glanced to the side to see if there was room to swerve off the road. Like something out of a nightmare, all I saw was a narrow strip of shoulder alongside a Kentucky-style drop-off from a cliff.

All of that took no more than a second. When I looked up, the speeding vehicle was getting so close that I could see that the driver’s right arm was flung across the top of the front seat and his head was lying sideways on top of it. He was either asleep or dead!

I frantically leaned on the horn until he was perhaps within 20 yards of me. In a millisecond, I had to decide whether to swerve to the other side of the road and chance hitting another car head on, or swerve to the right just enough to get out of the oncoming car’s path – and hope I wouldn’t go over the edge.

I guess by instinct, I chose the latter. Miraculously, I managed to keep from going over the cliff as the car whizzed by me. I looked through my rearview mirror and witnessed the most horrific sight of my young life. The car that had almost killed me slammed into the car that had been directly behind me.

It was like watching two toy cars collide. To this day, I not only can see the crash in my mind, I can hear the sounds of metal and glass bending, breaking, and flying through the air.

I got out of my car and ran to the scene of the crash. An elderly man and woman were stone dead in the front seat, covered with blood, heads thrown back over the top of their seats like mannequins.

I was shaking all over as I ran to a nearby farmhouse and yelled to some people on the front porch to call the highway patrol. The rest is kind of a blank, but I do recall that the driver of the other car was alive, and that a patrolman told me he was very drunk. He also said that, ironically, drunk drivers often survive deadly crashes such as this because their bodies are so relaxed.

After giving a statement to the officer, I drove the rest of the evening at a snail’s pace. I had developed instant paranoia about another car crossing over to my side of the road.

A year or two later, I was asked to fill out a form for the prosecutor in the county where the accident occurred, explaining in detail what had happened on that fateful night. I assume I helped put the perpetrator of that horrible crime in jail.

Since that time, I have been an advocate of stricter penalties for drunk drivers. To me, it is ludicrous that being drunk is considered to be a “mitigating circumstance.” If it were up to me, a drunk driver who kills someone would go to prison for life.

In my view, making the decision to drink and drive is as bad as premeditated murder, because it often ends with the death of others. And life-ending decisions should have life-ending consequences.

Drinking was no excuse for that driver in Kentucky to take the lives of two elderly folks. I thought a lot about how I would have felt had the victims been my mom and dad, and wondered who their children might be – and how devastated they must have been when they got the news.

So here I am, decades later, alive and well. Since that evening, I’ve cheated death on a number of other occasions – including a crash in a Learjet that totaled the plane. Part of me believes that in every case I was the beneficiary of divine intervention. But I cannot answer the atheist’s question of why God didn’t save that (presumably) innocent older couple driving just behind me.

In case you’re wondering, yes – I have often pondered why mine was the car in front rather than the car behind. I’ve even wondered if there was some way I could have maneuvered my car to bump that oncoming vehicle off course. I guess no matter how smart or successful we are, in the end, life is a series of unanswered questions.

How about you? Have you had one or more experiences in your life that could have – should have – killed you? And if so, to what do you attribute your survival? Predestination? Luck? Divine intervention? Or, like John P., your will to survive? Let us know right here.

[Ed. Note: It's a difficult truth, but anything could happen at any moment. That's why you need to live life to its fullest, every day. If you have unaccomplished goals or un-reached-for dreams, there's no better time than now to achieve them. Get started - and get plenty of motivation, every step of the way - right here.

For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's bestselling dealmaking audio series. And be sure to sign up for his Voice of Sanity e-letter.]

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One of the best things about the holiday season is the Christmas spirit. But just because Christmas has passed doesn’t mean you need to give up that joy. To get yourself back into the spirit – and to find some always-needed motivation – check out The Man Who Invented Christmas: How Charles Dickens’s A Christmas Carol Rescued His Career and Revived Our Holiday Spirits by Les Standiford.

The book is a good read (Les Standiford is a very good writer) and its subject – how Charles Dickens came to write A Christmas Carol - will inspire you. Here are some key points I took away from it:

• By writing about poor and powerless people triumphing over adversity, Dickens became hugely popular. (One-third of England’s reading public bought The Old Curiosity Shop.)

• Like all people of great accomplishment, success for Dickens did not come easy. He worked like a horse throughout his career. While writing The Pickwick Papers, for example, he was also writing new material for the second edition of Sketches by Boz, editing a literary magazine, and working on Gabriel Vardon, the Locksmith of London. 

• After a run of amazing success, Dickens went to America and then wrote two books bashing Americans. Neither was popular. Lesson: When you have a working formula, stick with it.

• Depressed by his recent failures, he conceived of A Christmas Carol as a way to get himself back on top. And it did. Lesson: Don’t give up.

• Because of his previous run of bad sales, he had to joint-venture with a book publisher, Chapman and Hall, for A Christmas Carol. Dickens took on risk and responsibility in the venture. And although he didn’t make much money for his efforts (because he overspent on the book cover, among other things), he learned about the business side of publishing novels, which he used to his advantage for the rest of his career.

• He had been thinking about the story for many years – but he wrote the book, while editing the color plates and working on the cover, in six weeks!

• A Christmas Carol promotes Dickens’s enduring themes: “the deleterious effects of ignorance and want, the necessity for charity, the benefits of goodwill, family unity, and the need for celebration of the life force, including the pleasures of good food and drink and good company.”

• The book changed the bird we traditionally eat on Christmas from goose to turkey.

[Ed. Note: As a special thank you to our best customers, Michael has started a new VIP service in which he gives insider business-building advice usually reserved for his private clients - a twice-weekly newsletter called Ready Fire Aim: The Michael Masterson Dispatch. If you have bought an ETR product or attended a conference and are not receiving Ready Fire Aim, please let us know by sending an e-mail to Michael@ETRfeedback.com.]

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I’ve been writing New Year’s Resolutions for Early to Rise since 2001. In previous years, I’ve recommended that you make resolutions to improve your health, grow your wealth, become a better person, and shake up your personal life. This year, ETR’s experts have resolutions in all those areas that you can put into action.

My recommendation for you this year is a little different.

I want you to put a little Ho! Ho! Ho! into your life.

What, exactly, is Ho! Ho! Ho!? It’s a technique that will:

• reveal important truths to you about life and living well
• reduce tension and the troubles tension creates
• help you overcome obstacles, even seemingly insurmountable ones
• increase the dopamine in your system and make you feel better
• improve your blood circulation, respiration, and digestion
• greatly reduce the chance that you will die of cancer or heart disease
• make you a more popular person
• increase the speed at which you achieve your goals
• give you more personal power

And the best things about this amazing technique is that:

• It won’t cost you a dime to implement it.
• You don’t need any special education or skills to take advantage of it.
• It takes only a few seconds of your time now and then.
• It gets easier to “practice” the more you do it

Are you ready to learn more?

In 1992, during the height of the rioting in Los Angeles, Terry Braverman was driving along the Hollywood freeway during rush hour. Looking through the passenger window, he saw fires blazing in the city. The odor of smoke was mixing with the familiar scent of smog, and it was making the bumper-to-bumper drive seem somewhat dangerous. He glanced at his fellow commuters, and could see in their faces that they, too, were feeling anxious.

Their anxiety made him feel even more anxious. He felt himself starting to panic. Then he remembered a simple maxim: You can’t control what you can’t control, but you are in charge of the way you react to it.

He decided at that moment, in the middle of the most nerve-shaking traffic jam he had ever been in, to lighten up. Luckily, Braverman had a way to do that. Being a professional comedian, he had a prop bag on the seat behind him. Reaching back, he pulled out a rubber clown nose. “This is just what I need,” he thought.

Donning the clown nose, Braverman again looked out the window. At first, he said, the drivers around him were doing double-takes, as if to say, “He’s a tourist. He doesn’t know what is happening.” But when he smiled, they got the message. “I wanted them to know that in spite of the circumstances we can take a moment to lighten up and suspend the downward spiral of distress.”

Reading this story in Terry Braverman’s book, When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Lighten Up, reminded me of that wonderful movie, Life Is Beautiful,
about a father who heroically keeps up his son’s spirits in a concentration camp by playing the clown. It reminded me also of Viktor Frankl’s great book, Man’s Search for Meaning, in which he tells about his own true-life experience of being in a concentration camp, and the amazing conclusion he came to after enduring the worst kind of human loss.

Frankl says, “As we see, a human being is not one in pursuit of happiness but rather in search of a reason to become happy. … Once an individual’s search for meaning is successful, it not only renders him happy but also gives him the capability to cope with suffering.”

In his book, Braverman also tells the story of Jean Houston, a philosopher and the author of A Mythic Life, who was traveling with a colleague to Washington, DC to speak at a conference that was meant to inspire attendees to be more creative. The colleague was complaining about how impossible it is to inspire creativity in government bureaucrats. “They spend their lives rearranging chairs on the Titanic. They are not going to listen to us,” she said.

“We’ll have to alter their consciousness,” Houston replied.

“How?”

Houston explained that the best method she knew was through humor. So she was going to spend the first 10 minutes of her presentation making jokes. “At the peak of roaring laughter, one exists, as in mid-sneeze, everywhere and nowhere,” she said, “and is thus available to be blessed, evoked, and deepened.”

Houston’s “method” is one that many professional speakers use. Audiences are often ill at ease in seminar situations. When you are feeling that way, you are more judgmental and resistant. But if a speaker is good enough to get you laughing, you will open up to him a little. You will feel, “Okay. I’m ready now. Tell me what you want and I’ll listen.”

Braverman tells how Rich Little saved himself from being beaten up by a bunch of thugs. “I was pretty scared, but within 15 minutes I had them laughing. I was doing my whole act. … So I turned that around I don’t remember exactly how. I think I went into Louie Armstrong. … They didn’t know who I was, but when I started doing the impressions they lost their incentive to beat me up.” In this case, Little’s humor did more than improve his own mental state – it improved his fate. At the end, he says, the thugs were applauding.

We’ve all been in situations where we allowed ourselves to be swept away by anger. Someone – minsinformed or not – calls you an a-hole or a jackass, and you respond with curse words and fury.

When I have used humor in difficult situations, it has never failed to help. At the very least, it made me feel better by putting things in context: Life is short. We live. We die. It’s the same for all of us. Lighten up.

A great movie that touches on this subject was made in 1927. It is called Sunrise. It may take you 15 minutes or so to get into it, because it is in black and white and is silent, but invest the time. It is a powerful, moving story. And pay attention to the role that humor plays in it. It will make you want to be kinder and more loving. And it will show you how lightening up is so essential to that.

One of the most effective executives I know, the CEO of a major company, is a master of this powerful method of managing crisis. Because of his position, he often finds himself listening to senior managers who are upset about some real or imagined injustice done to them by some colleague in the business.

When I have been in similar situations – and I have been many times – my response was always to take the complaints of my managers seriously and try to work them out in a serious way. But “Chris” usually employs humor as his first response. He has a gift for making you understand how trivial your complaint is in the big scheme of things. I don’t know how he does it, but he’s done it with me a dozen times, and I can tell you it works.

Chris does a great job of resolving disputes because his first reaction to problems is to look for the Ho! Ho! Ho! in them. Most problems in life, it turns out, aren’t as serious as they first seem. Those that are can still be dealt with better when you approach them with a lighter attitude.

So that’s my wish for you this year – that, in the face of all this economic turmoil and the negative impact it may be having on your life, you find time, when you are stressed, to find some lightness in your soul. It may not change the direction of the Dow (unless everybody lightens up), but it will give you the energy and flexibility to move forward with hope and happiness.

[Ed. Note: As a special thank you to our best customers, Michael has started a new VIP service in which he gives insider business-building advice usually reserved for his private clients - a twice-weekly newsletter called Ready Fire Aim: The Michael Masterson Dispatch. If you have bought an ETR product or attended a conference and are not receiving Ready Fire Aim, please let us know by sending an e-mail to Michael@ETRfeedback.com.]

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“I can’t believe he called you at 9:00 at night. You don’t think that is totally inappropriate?” asked my sister-in-law Connie.

When I told her I did not, and was happy he’d called, her jaw dropped even further. 

We were talking about a business colleague of mine. “Larry” had called to ask me if I could speak with his mastermind group on a teleconference later that week. 

He wanted me to speak to the group about accelerating their businesses growth via multi-channel marketing. Given the fact that his attendee list included people like Alex Mandossian, Tony Robbins, and John Carlton – people I personally considered my mentors – I was honored to accept. 

When I tried explaining this to my sister-in-law, she just waved her hand and said, “In my day, when you left the office at 5:00, you were done until 9:00 the next morning.” 

I thought about dropping the subject, but I couldn’t resist the challenge. 

She opted for early retirement about six years ago – but I asked her if, during her working years, she’d ever left the office to pick up a sick kid from school, go to a dentist appointment, or meet the cable man at her house. 

When she begrudgingly nodded her head yes, I knew I had her attention. And I hope I have yours as well. If you think that your work life exists only between 9:00 and 5:00 … and that your home and social life exist only between 5:00 and 9:00, you need to make a change.

I recommend that you resolve, right here and now, to make your life better, more rewarding, and more balanced. And I’m going to help you do it.

Who am I to talk about balance? Well, I’m a happily married mother of three who runs a 25-person business. Over the past few years, I’ve gotten pretty good at managing all the different aspects of my life in a way that makes me feel happy and proud.

The very first step to creating a happier, healthier lifestyle is to realize that “9:00 to 5:00″ no longer applies. By giving yourself the flexibility to do business at all hours of the day or night, you are actually better able to enjoy both your work and your family even more.

This may sound counter-intuitive but by taking the following five simple steps, you will be able to break free of the 9:00 to 5:00 shackles.

Creating Balance Step One: Define what a balanced life means to you.

Many people think that having a balanced life means spending the same number of hours on work as you do on personal activities. This is a big mistake, because most of the time it just is not realistic.

To define what will work for you, you need to take into consideration that life is constantly changing. And the right balance for you today may not be the right balance for you tomorrow or next week or next month, because over time your priorities change. The one constant in knowing you have a balanced life is the feeling of accomplishment and happiness you enjoy every day.

Creating Balance Step Two: Create Boundaries

Some people may agree with my sister-in-law that receiving a business call at 9:00 at night is inappropriate. But the way I look at it is that Larry is someone who is good for my organization and good for my career. Besides, when I met him at a conference earlier this year, he asked me for the best way to reach me. I gave him my e-mail address and my cell number. So why shouldn’t he call?

And keep in mind that I made the decision to take his call that night – I created the boundary. It happened to be a good time to talk. However, if he’d made the call 90 minutes earlier – when I was decorating the Christmas tree with my kids and my husband – I would have let it go to voice mail and called him back when it was convenient for me.

Later that week, I was the keynote speaker on the mastermind teleconference Larry had invited me to. Many of the attendees learned a great deal. In fact, I got several e-mails from attendees saying they’d purchased the book on multi-channel marketing that I co-authored with Michael Masterson. Others called or e-mailed to ask if they could promote the book to their in-house list. 

Had I adopted the attitude that I would do business only from 9:00 to 5:00, I may have lost out on a wonderful opportunity that proved to be valuable both to ETR and to me personally.

Because I advocate balance, I support the efforts my team members make in striving for balance in their own lives. Some of them work in the evening and/or on the weekends. So I have no problem with it if they need to leave to take care of something personal. I truly believe that your accomplishments aren’t dependent on how much time you spend in the office.

Creating Balance Step Three: Learn how to say “No.”

No one wants to say no to their boss, their spouse, their employees, their friends, or their kids. But to achieve balance, you are going to have to do it once in a while.

We all have the same 24 hours in a day. And we cannot possibly do everything that we want to do AND everything that everyone else wants us to do. So a big part of leading a more balanced life is to cut down on unnecessary tasks and protect your priorities.

When requests or conflicts are set before you, ask yourself: “Is this going to give me a feeling of accomplishment and a feeling of happiness?” 

Almost four years ago, a good friend of mine – “Rita” – wanted my husband and me to meet her new boyfriend. He was “the one” as she put it. So we made dinner plans for the following evening. 

But when our two-month-old baby Delanie woke up in the morning, she had a fever. I called Rita and apologized, but told her we would have to cancel. I just did not feel right about leaving the baby with a sitter. 

Rita was irate. She said I was overreacting, and asked how I could possibly feel that way given that Delanie was our third child. 

As I held Delanie though the day and night, I knew I had made the right decision. But I was saddened by Rita’s anger – and her anger lasted for weeks.

Then, about five weeks after the infamous missed dinner, Rita called to say that “the one” had dumped her. This time it was her turn to apologize, saying that now she realized I had made the right decision. 

Social decisions are one thing, but work decisions can be more difficult. You must learn that sometimes you have to choose your family, your health, or even your social life over work. And you’ll also have to make some hard decisions to put work first.

For instance, I take my health seriously. But last week, a doctor’s appointment conflicted with a last-minute visit from one of Agora’s top executives. The only chance I had to see him was during the time I’d reserved for my appointment. Since I wasn’t sick and the appointment was for a simple check up, I didn’t think twice about rescheduling.

Creating Balance Step Four: Keep a journal.

The only way to make your life better is to understand what you’re doing, what’s working, and what isn’t. And there are far too many things going on in our lives to try to keep it all in our heads.

So keep a journal. Write down what you spend time on – everything from the meetings you attend to how many times you go to the gym.

Keeping a journal will help you see if you are spending your time in the most productive way – and it will make you accountable for your actions. It will help you accomplish your professional and personal goals, and will make you proud of those accomplishments.

Creating Balance Step Five: Understand that you’re not a superhero.

Having a balanced life means being realistic. Realistic about the fact that some things are just not going to get done. And you have to be okay with that.

When my husband and I got married 12 year ago, we both had busy careers. But we still enjoyed spending time decorating and upgrading our home with art and new furniture. After a busy day, we loved coming home to our immaculate sanctuary. 

Well… once we had kids, things started looking a lot different. Instead of the beautiful vase I picked up in Mexico on the coffee table – there was a stuffed Elmo. Soon our Tiffany picture frames were replaced by toy trains. And many days, while we’re making dinner, the kids have all the pots and pans on the floor. 

But instead of spending my time cleaning up and trying to make my house look perfect, I would much rather play with the kids, banging on the pots and pans with them and playing with trains. 

There are always things out of place in my house – but that is exactly the way it should be. Because when I come home to my family, I absolutely have a feeling of great accomplishment and happiness! 

This goes for work, too. You may have a dozen projects on your plate, and only so much time to complete them. Don’t get down on yourself for letting one of them slide so you can spend more time on marketing, or so you can care for your ailing grandmother, or so you can spend an hour at the gym.

Following the other guidelines I’ve recommended – figuring out what kind of balance is right for you, creating boundaries, picking priorities, and knowing what’s working and what isn’t – will help you feel confident that your accomplishments are enough… even if you have more goals you want to achieve.

[Ed. Note: One of the best ways to strike a good balance between work and home? Start your own Internet business. You can operate it on your own time, from your back bedroom. And it can help you achieve the financial security and satisfaction you've always dreamed of. Get a step-by-step guide to starting your own Internet business right here. But hurry - space is limited.]

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So are you feeling the pinch these days?

When the economy slides like it has over the last year or so, the knee-jerk reaction is to tighten the belt. Business owners look at the bottom line, see what’s not absolutely necessary, and get rid of it.

But I suggest you look BEYOND the bottom line. Because downturns like we’re experiencing are just that – downturns. Which means the logical next step is what?

That’s right – an UP-turn.

So if you can brave the storm and stay focused on the future of your business instead of the immediate, then you’ll be perfectly positioned when the pendulum starts to swing the other way.

Which means while everyone else is scrambling to get back in the game, you’ll already be miles ahead of your competition. Why? Because you didn’t panic when times got tough – you just worked smarter.

Makes sense, doesn’t it?

We’ve made some difficult decisions at Strategic Profits over the past few months. And those decisions – no matter how tough – were engineered with one goal in mind: to make our company more profitable both today AND tomorrow. And it’s working. We’re on our way to a record-breaking year, and 2009 looks even bigger and brighter.

So how can you keep your head above water while still finding ways to increase profits and grow your business?

Never – EVER – skimp on investing in your business development. Focus on the areas where you may be weakest and search for learning opportunities to help improve those skills.

Is it traffic generation? Product creation? Branding and promotion? These are crucial elements in your journey to become successful. And now’s the perfect time to dive in and get educated about them.

Though it may seem like a new coaching program or business-building system will be detrimental to the bottom line, you’ll actually be making huge strides toward GROWING it. Soon, you’ll find yourself stronger and more confident in those areas. And when the UP-turn happens (it will happen, trust me), you’ll be perfectly positioned to maximize your efforts and experience tremendous profit growth.

[Ed. Note: The best way to position yourself for the inevitable UP-turn? Join ETR's Internet Money Club. This program offers personal coaching that will walk you, step by step, through everything it takes to start and grow your own Internet business. Learn the details here.

Rich Schefren, known in marketing circles as "The Guru's Guru," is an online business exploder whose clients rake in more than $500 million every year - piling up more than $1 billion in sales every two years. Visit his blog to learn how to streamline your business while skyrocketing profits.]

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I used to gripe about the “inconvenience” of the holiday season. Too often, I felt that my work goals suffered because people I needed to get in touch with were simply not available. It sometimes seemed like everyone I wanted to talk to was taking a long lunch break to do Christmas shopping or had left work early to get ready for an office Christmas party.

It took me way too long to realize how important it is for our sense of well-being to allow ourselves to partake in all the joys of the holidays.

Let In the “Jingle Bell” Spirit

I believe that any system you don’t embrace will ostracize you. And the relaxed attitudes in the workplace and loss of production that go along with the holiday season are part of a system I wasn’t embracing. So I was getting left out. And it was all of my own doing.

For too many years, while my partners, coworkers, and friends were planning joyous occasions and enjoying time with family… I was in a foul mood. Meetings were cancelled, projects were delayed, and my timeframes were adversely affected.

I was on a mission (achieving my business goals), and to heck with the holidays.

Eventually, I realized that my approach was limiting my success. I had been oblivious to the reality that the holidays DO change people’s normal schedules and – to some degree – their thinking. Everyone wants to spend additional time with family and friends.

Yes, maybe a coworker was taking a few days off because his kids had come home from college for the holidays. But did I really need to let that throw me off? Would it matter if I had to wait another day or two to receive the information or schedule the meeting? Of course not.

The eureka moment for me came when my wife Karin let me in on a little secret. (Actually, almost everybody knew it but me.) “Bob, you are bucking a system, and you can’t win!” she said. “Besides, you are missing unique opportunities to refuel your emotional well-being.”

Suddenly, it all made sense (especially since she first put in a Bing Crosby recording of holiday music to set the mood).

From that day forward, I vowed to let “der Bingle” fill me with some jingle bell spirit. And, quite truthfully, I have become a better person, husband, father, friend, neighbor, and coworker because of it!

How can YOU not miss out (like I used to) on the joys and wonders of the upcoming holiday season?

Create Your Own Holiday Vision Statement

Every business has a mission – a mission that it often shares with its employees and clients through a “vision statement.”

When done right, it puts everyone on the same page: Clients know what to expect when they hire the company, and employees know what they need to do to get the job done… and why it’s important.

The same principles can be applied to creating your personal Holiday Vision Statement.

1. Begin at the beginning.

The best way to begin to put together any mission or personal vision statement is to ask yourself questions. What is expected of me during the holidays from my family, friends, and coworkers? What priorities are important to me? What community activities do I want to participate in? How can I reflect the best of myself during the holidays to those around me? How can I apply myself to yield the best results?

2. Bring in those that matter.

There is no reason for you to do this alone. Bring in your spouse or significant other, children, friends, and other family members to help you plan your holiday mission. You could do this by phone, via e-mail, or by holding a group meeting. You might even encourage them to create their own holiday vision statements or work together to create a Family Holiday Vision Statement.

It may take some time to make those calls or send off those e-mails or set up a family meeting. However, the benefits will be well worth it. You will get a lot of great input. And you will end up with a statement suited for your personal objectives that also takes into account the thoughts and feelings of people who matter to you.

3. Make a rough draft.

Once you have everyone’s input, as well as your own answers to the questions you asked yourself, you’ll be ready to draft your personal Holiday Vision Statement. And it only needs to be a few paragraphs. Here, I’ll even get you started…

My goal this year is to enjoy the holidays! To that end, I choose to embrace a holiday mindset of being ready for the joys and wonder of the season…

4. Polish it to shine like a star.

When you complete your draft, I want you to polish it over and over until it shines like the star atop a beautifully decorated Christmas tree. You could even circulate it by e-mail to everyone who helped you with it, or hold another family meeting to discuss it.

5. Post it.

Whether you write out your Holiday Vision Statement by hand, hammer it out on your old typewriter, or use your computer, I encourage you to post a copy in a place where you will see it often throughout the day: on your refrigerator, on your wall calendar at work, and/or on your computer’s desktop.

Your Holiday Agenda

I want you to have some fun this holiday season… especially with your family. And make sure every family member gets involved in making it a great time for all. Pop up some popcorn or make hot chocolate and sit at the dining room table with paper and pens. Say “We are going to enjoy the holidays this year. What are your ideas?”

Here are some ideas to consider:

• What can we do in the community this year? Visit a nursing home, participate in the church choir, sponsor a toy drive?

• What can we do to stick with a realistic holiday budget? Could we go online to find deals or stop by a local crafts store for ideas on making gifts instead of buying them?

• Do we want to make plans for family visits, travel, or hosting a party? If so, who is going to do what?

• What school, work, or neighborhood events are we attending this year?

You’re getting the idea, right? The holidays are going to happen anyway, so why not begin them with a joyful mindset and take advantage of the opportunities that are unique to this time of year? If you are open and receptive… good times will happen. Even more important, you’ll remember those good times forever.

A final thought: Don’t forget to enjoy holiday working, too! The holiday spirit at work can be infectious if you are in the right mood.

I am not condoning abandoning your responsibilities. Not in the least. I am advocating expanding your goal to enjoy the holidays this year to include the workplace – to bring your newfound Jingle Bell Spirit to your coworkers, partners, bosses, vendors, and customers. After all, a genuine smile and happy holiday greeting doesn’t cost a penny… but can be priceless to the recipient.

[Ed. Note: Pledge right now that the holidays will be a time of joy rather than stress. Share your own Holiday Vision Statement here.

For more of success expert Bob Cox's advice on how to achieve your goals, check out his "Flip the Success Switch" guide. Learn how to get your copy here.]

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If the recession has you paralyzed in your tracks and scared shoeless for your financial future, here’s a radical idea.

Start your own online business. Yes, and do it right now.

Naturally, you may think this is the worst possible time for taking a step outside your comfort zone. But that logic simply doesn’t fly, according to MIT researchers.

They noted that William Hewlett and David Packard founded Hewlett-Packard in 1939, when the Great Depression had been underway for a full decade. And in September 1945, Masaru Ibuka started Sony – after his country had been devastated by war and was occupied by a foreign power.

And how about starting a company while interest rates are skyrocketing, with the stock market having dropped 45 percent the previous year and the country suffering the aftermath of both a presidential scandal and a war it had just lost? Well, despite all that, in 1975 Paul Allen and Bill Gates started Microsoft, says the MIT team.

Still not convinced?

The January 2009 issue of Fortune Small Business reports that no fewer than 18 of the 30 companies currently comprising the Dow Jones Industrial Average were launched amidst economic downturns!

The verdict is clear.

Don’t let a temporarily slow economy stop you from getting started right now on a lifetime of future wealth.

[Ed. Note: Don't know where to start when it comes to getting an Internet business off the ground? Not to worry - ETR has you covered. As a member of our elite Internet Money Club, our team of experts will walk you step by step through everything from setting up a website to creating your products to writing sales copy, and much more. Get the details here.]

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“Don’t put an age limit on your dreams.” That’s a quote from Dara Torres, one of my heroes and an Olympic champion. At the age of 41, she dared to enter the 2008 Olympics and swim a “kids’ race,” the 100 meter free. It’s an all-out sprint. One length of the pool. Winner takes the gold medal.

Dara lost the gold by 1/100th of a second. That’s almost too short to measure.

She won silver. She beat the American 16-year-old who was swimming just a few lanes over. She beat her personal record set when she herself was a teenager. She smashed the American record. She bested her last Olympics, and the one before that, with a time that, except for a slight start mistake would have won her a gold medal.

Let me put that into perspective: Dara lost by 1/100th of a second to a girl young

enough to be her daughter. In fact, ALL the other racers were young enough to be her daughters.

Dara is not “old.” She’s not even “middle-aged.” Those are terms that limit our ability to achieve. Dara is simply an athlete. A mom. A true woman of power. Someone who lives in the present. Dara is a champion, and there is no age requirement attached to the label “champ.” Even Olympic champ.

She beat her personal best, set almost 20 years prior, and did it in the toughest arena ever created. And Dara was not the oldest Olympian this year. John Dane III, 58, crewed a boat for the Olympic sailing team. Libby Callahan, 56, became the oldest U.S. female Olympian of all time. She competed with the shooting team.

So, I ask you: What do you think you’re too old to do?

[Ed. Note: There's no age limit on success. You can accomplish anything you set your mind to. You can start your own business, increase your income, and even start on the path toward real wealth. Learn how here.

Jon Benson is a life coach and nutrition counselor who specializes in helping individuals discover a life-altering mind/body connection. His work in the field of post-40 fitness and mental empowerment has helped countless thousands rediscover a youthful body and positive outlook. Discover how you can do the same by clicking here.]

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Americans love to throw around the term “hero.” But what is a hero? We tend not only to ascribe the word to illiterate athletes, but to people who happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, as well.

An extreme example of the latter would be the infamous Iran-hostage “crisis” that ended after 444 days on January 20, 1981. With Kim Jong Il’s best friend, Jimmy Carter, spending more than a year trying to remove his thumb from his left nostril, Iran’s version of Crazy Guggenheim – Ayatollah Khomeini – had things pretty much his way.

But once Ronald Reagan was elected president, Krazy Khomeini started envisioning a nuclear cloud over Iran for the next 400 years. Which, in turn, motivated him to come to his senses and release the hostages. Like every other civilized person, I was happy for both the hostages and their families.

Nevertheless, when the media started portraying them as heroes and New York held a tickertape parade for them, I was baffled. You happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and you’re hailed as a hero? I think a little perspective is called for. To me, a hero is someone who accomplishes extraordinary feats under extraordinarily difficult circumstances, such as the firefighters who marched into the World Trade Center towers in an attempt to save lives while everyone else was scurrying to get out.

In this regard, I have great admiration and respect for Jessica Lynch, the American soldier who was captured and held prisoner in Iraq, and was subsequently rescued in a daring raid by U.S. troops. My admiration and respect are a result of her making it clear to a national television audience that she was not, in fact, a hero.

Despite the way she was depicted by The New York Times and other major publications, she explained, in an interview with Diane Sawyer, that there was no truth to any of those stories. In fact, Lynch said that not only did she not do any fighting, she was hurt so badly that she didn’t even remember what happened to her. When Sawyer asked why she would volunteer such information, she explained that she could not live with herself if she allowed people to believe that she fought heroically when she had not.

So though Lynch is not a hero, her refreshing honesty and humility command enormous respect, especially in this day and age of declining Western values.

Thinking back to the Iran hostage situation reminds me of two genuine heroes – 13-year-old Mattie Stepanek, who succumbed to a severe case of muscular dystrophy, and Christopher Reeve, who became a quadriplegic after a horse-riding accident and passed away as a result of complications from an infection.

At the age of 10, Mattie Stepanek wrote Heartsongs, a book of poetry that became a New York Times #1 best-seller. He followed that remarkable feat with four more books of poetry, two of which also became best-sellers. He was a frequent guest on The Oprah Winfrey Show, Good Morning America, and Larry King Live. His messages were always upbeat, positive, and inspiring. Few adults have ever spoken with more wisdom and deep insight into life than Mattie.

Christopher Reeve was beyond amazing. Though he had to struggle just to breathe, he found the time, energy, and determination not only to continue acting but also to direct a film, take an active role in fighting for stem-cell research, testify before Congress, and appear on virtually every major television talk show.

Other than recognizing these two giants of courage as true heroes, what else can we learn from their lives?

• Heroes come in all shapes and sizes.

It seems somewhat ironic that the joint subjects of this article are a scrawny 13-year-old kid and Superman. But after a lifetime of observation, it’s become clear to me that size, physical strength, skin color, gender, and ethnicity, among other things, are of little significance compared to a will to succeed.

• Though human beings, through the gift of free will coupled with action, are able to exercise a great deal of control over their destinies, the inevitable will always be one of man’s greatest nemeses.

The National Safety Council says that a fatal accident occurs every five minutes in the United States, and a disabling injury occurs every two seconds. There is no question that we have the capacity to stack the odds in our favor when it comes to leading longer, healthier lives. Yet, in a head-to-head battle, we are no match for the inevitable. This, however, does not mean that you should become a fatalist and stop trying. That would be irrational on its face.

What it does mean is that you should always keep in mind that there’s an offsetting positive to every negative, and the offsetting positive to the inevitable is that it teaches the wise person humility. Do everything possible to stack the odds in your favor. Work hard at success in all areas of your life, but make certain you don’t become so enamored with yourself that you start believing you’re omnipotent, immortal, or both.

Remember, you’re always just one bad break away from becoming a quadriplegic, getting a terminal disease, or suffering a fatal accident.

• Relativity.

It may sound trite, but you really should be grateful when you wake up every morning, especially if you have been blessed with good health.

Given that a handicap is defined as anything that makes achievement more difficult, each of us is burdened with many handicaps. Not necessarily physical handicaps, but handicaps just the same. Broken marriages, financial problems, lack of a track record – the list of factors that can make achievement more difficult is infinite.

Brooding over a handicap, whatever it may be, is a surefire way to increase its negative impact on your life. You brood, you lose. Whenever you feel as though the temptation to feel sorry for yourself is taking control of your emotions, refocus your thoughts on genuine heroes like Mattie Stepanek and Christopher Reeve.

When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. Heroes are great teachers. They lead by example. All that is required is that you be ready to learn.

[Ed. Note: Improving your life starts from the inside out. And it IS possible for you to become a hero. Yes, you need to take action in order to move yourself forward to success. But sometimes you need a little push to get yourself going... and some simple techniques to help you accomplish your dreams. Discover 189 ways to get everything you want out of life.

For a treasure chest of proven ideas, strategies, and techniques for increasing your income many times over, check out Robert Ringer's best-selling dealmaking audio series. And be sure to sign up for his Voice of Sanity e-letter.]

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About eight years ago, I did a little experiment. I wanted to find out if it really is possible to do business from anywhere in the world. So I packed my family off to Rome (one of my favorite cities) for a six-week “working vacation.” I not only learned that, yes, it is possible for me to work in Rome (or just about anywhere else, for that matter), I also learned something that has had a much more profound effect.

In Rome, completely separated from the crazy, stressful routine I was used to back home. I learned how to simplify my life.

If you think simplifying your life will mean making less money, enjoying less success, maybe even being less effective as a businessperson, think again. Simplifying your life is about having more – not less – of the good things. More passion. More meaningful work and relationships. And you can have more of those things by having fewer of the bad things – unsatisfying rituals, self-destructive habits, energy-draining feelings, and so on.

Today, I’d like to talk about one way to simplify your life at work. If you follow my suggestions, you’ll not only achieve more productivity but also gain more inner peace by avoiding emotionally costly conflicts.

We live in a time in which meaningless busyness keeps most people from achieving great things. They mistake being busy for being productive. They let the priorities of other people – their boss, their spouse, maybe even their children – take precedence. As a result, they feel swamped… and out of control.

You’re not going to regain control over your life if you continue to try to deal with too many issues in too little time. As counterintuitive as it may sound, the only way to do it is to learn how to:

• simplify that which is complex

• eliminate that which is superfluous

• know the difference between the two

As an example, let’s take a trap that I used to fall into all the time: getting involved in settling disputes between employees. Is it critical to your business that people get along? Yes. Especially since conflicts often get in the way of their working effectively. Is it up to you to drop what you’re doing and help smooth the waters? No… not unless you want to join them in being unproductive.

So what should you do when the temptation arises to get involved?

Assure both individuals that they are bright and capable… or they wouldn’t have been hired. Let them know that you have every confidence that they will find a way to settle the matter privately, between the two of them. And make sure they know that while it is uncomfortable for them not to be getting along, it is even less comfortable for the entire team.

Instead of spending hours trying to resolve a problem that has nothing to do with your own priorities, it will take only about 10 minutes of your time to build their confidence, show them that you support them, establish your expectation for a good-faith effort to resolve the conflict – and perhaps make both parties feel slightly embarrassed for making the rest of the group feel uneasy.

As long as you allow your quest for simplicity to be pushed aside – in favor of getting involved in situations where you don’t belong, constantly checking your e-mail, going to pointless meetings, or writing long memos that no one reads – the ability to leverage your time and attention will continue to elude you. So will everything else that you’d like to accomplish in this lifetime.

Here’s what you need in order to regain control – what I call the ETR Simplicity Imperative:

• Solid Vision

Whether you’re managing a project, running a company, or handling your day-to-day schedule, you need a firm grasp of the big picture. Further, you need to be able to articulate your vision to others with clarity and ease and help them find ways to support it… not work against it. When we’re not clear about our vision, we are at our most vulnerable. Our time and attention become diffused, and we start to lose focus.

• Clear Priorities

Your priorities grow naturally out of your vision – out of knowing what’s important and doing only that. Then, when you find yourself behind on reaching your goals, you don’t have to look far to find the problem. Usually, it means you have lost control of your time because you stopped minding your priorities.

• Daily Discipline

Perhaps the most valuable finite resource known to man is time. Squander it, and there’s no way to get it back. Adhering to a daily schedule that is led by your vision and run by your priorities is the surest path to personal freedom. That might sound easy, but it’s not. Most of us resist, and we pay the price. (It’s not surprising that most serious diseases are stress-related.)

When compiling your daily do-do list, ask yourself these three questions:

1. “Is this something I could just as well delegate/eliminate?”
2. “Is there some way I could do this in half the time?”
3. “Is this related to an objective that will truly make my life better/richer/fuller?”

In selecting my priorities each day, I highlight the most important tasks – the ones that that are essential to my long-term personal Master Plan. And because I know I can do only a limited number of things each day, I start by doing those.

If I ever have to choose between two priorities, I ask myself: “Of the two, which one will be more important to me at the end of my life?”

It’s all about economy – doing fewer things overall but making sure that the things you do have more importance.

Two more things that can help you establish priorities:

• Pareto’s Law: Twenty percent of the things we do will achieve 80 percent of what we want. So ask yourself, “Which of the tasks that are before me are among that 20 percent?”

• The Gold, Vapor, and Acid Rule: Just about any activity you choose to do can fit into one of three categories. It can damage you in some way, improve you somehow, or leave you more or less the same. Think of the best choices – the ones that can improve you – as Gold. Think of the neutral choices – the ones that will just help you pass the time – as Vapor. And think of the worst choices – the ones that can hurt you – as Acid.

It’s up to you how much Gold, Vapor, and Acid you are going to have in your life.

To simplify your life, you have to do more of what gives you soulful satisfaction and less of what gives you negative – or no – rewards. Out with the bad. In with the good. In setting your goals and planning your time, keep that in mind.

Giving yourself the power to take control of your time really is the secret to success. And it will even make it possible for you to smell those roses along the way.

[Ed. Note: What if you had an ingenious way to deal with almost any of life's little frustrations or major problems? From gossip to liars to lousy credit ratings... irritating neighbors, IRS audits, and bully bosses... billing errors, back pain, and out-of-control in-laws. We've got quick and effective solutions for these and hundreds more. Get them all for free right here.]  

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“I’ve just got to say how much I look forward to, and love, my daily ‘fix’ of ETR. I like it even more than my daily ‘fix’ of coffee – and that’s a damn lot!!

“Many thanks to you and all your colleagues. Keep up the good work.

“Cheers!”

Mike Coates

Liverpool, England

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We all have troubles. In many ways, they define our lives. But, according to philosopher Abraham Kaplan, we can deal with them more effectively if we recognize them as either problems or predicaments.

The difference? Problems, says Kaplan, can be solved. Predicaments can only be coped with.

If you work in downtown Baltimore, for example, you may be worried about crime. This is a predicament, not a problem. You can install a security system in your car, avoid the worst areas after dark, or arrange a transfer to a different office. But these are coping mechanisms. You are not going to “fix” crime in Baltimore.

A more serious predicament we all face is the occasional death of a loved one. We can spend time grieving with family and friends, join a support group, or take up new activities to keep our minds from becoming preoccupied. But death itself cannot be bargained with.

Fortunately, most of our troubles are not predicaments but problems.

You may worry, for instance, that you haven’t saved enough for a comfortable retirement. If so, you have plenty of company. According to the 2007 Retirement Confidence Survey by the Employee Benefit Research Institute (EBRI), 36 percent of workers have less than $10,000 in retirement savings. Another 13 percent have less than $25,000.

Clearly, this is a problem, but one with a straightforward solution. You can make more. You can spend less. Or you can earn a higher return on your investments. (Doing all three isn’t bad either.)

Or, you may be one of the millions of Americans who struggle with obesity. If so, it is probably having a detrimental effect on your health, your self-image, and your quality of life. And for some, this is both a problem and a predicament. After all, genetics determine your basic body type. As you learned in fifth-grade health class, you were born an ecotomorph, a mesomorph, or an endomorph. You cannot change this. But anyone can eat better, exercise more, or both. Not easy, but there is a solution.

Why is it important to label the trials you face as either problems or predicaments?

According to John C. Maxwell, author of The Difference Maker, “When people treat a predicament as a problem, they become frustrated, angry, or depressed. They waste energy. They make bad decisions. And when people treat problems as predicaments, they often settle, give up, or see themselves as victims.”

Understand this and you’ve taken the first step toward dealing with your predicaments and solving your problems.

Nielsen Media Research tells us that Americans love reality shows where contestants are put in high-pressure situations and challenged to “win” by using every bit of intelligence, cunning, and resourcefulness they can muster. Why not view your own problems the same way? If you have a boring job, an inattentive spouse, or a looming financial setback, why not use all your smarts, imagination, and creativity to turn the tables?

My guess is that if you were in front of a national television audience – and in danger of being voted off the show – you’d come up with something pretty good, something that would surprise the people around you.

In fact, this is exactly what you should be doing, according to Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, author of Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience. He argues that the quickest way to increase your life satisfaction is to quit seeing your problems as difficulties and start viewing them as enjoyable challenges.

Facing your problems this way requires just two things: a bit of imagination and a positive attitude. The payoff, in turn, can be huge.

Whether you want to start your own business, lose 30 pounds, or get out of debt, you can begin by relishing the challenge. You might surprise yourself, too. Not only by achieving your goals, but by seeing how much satisfaction you get just by moving toward them in a disciplined way.

Think of it as your own reality show. (One that, ironically, actually deals with reality.) The obstacles in front of you give you the opportunity to show the world – and yourself – what you’re made of.

So why not attack those obstacles today with a fresh mindset and a new attitude? You have nothing to lose but your troubles.

[Ed. Note: Happiness is well within your reach. Learn how you can make your life richer – in both senses of the word – right here.

And be sure to join Alex Green, Chairman of Investment U and Investment Director of The Oxford Club, as he tackles some of life’s more difficult challenges in his free, twice-weekly e-letter Spiritual Wealth. Sign up here.

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“Just when everyone tells you we’ve hit a ‘permanent plateau’ in what works or doesn’t work in marketing, Michael Masterson and MaryEllen Tribby come along to blow those assumptions out of the water. As their book, Changing the Channel, makes clear, we’re at the gates of a golden age. Opportunity dead? It’s just getting started – with at least these dozen brilliant ways to step across the threshold. It’s not often you get to see two hugely successful marketers tag-team to lay down their insights like this. Here, they have. And it was clearly worth the wait.”

John Forde

Copywriter and Editor

The Copywriter’s Roundtable

[Ed. Note: Changing the Channel: 12 Easy Ways to Make Millions for Your Business is the brand-new book by MaryEllen Tribby and Michael Masterson. The book doesn't come out until October 28 - but you can learn more about it and the power of multi-channel marketing at www.ChangingtheChannelBook.com. Keep reading ETR for details on when you can secure your copy.]

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“I just turned 29 yesterday… and I feel so lost and confused. I quit my job 7 months ago, where I worked in insurance as a salesperson for 2 1/2 years. It was my 3rd resignation, since my boss retained me twice before. I guess I ‘could’ sell, but I hated it. Period. I was extremely unhappy and always felt I didn’t belong.

“I majored in marketing. And although marketing and sales are cousins, I still felt it wasn’t the job for me. However, all the job proposals I receive are either sales, banking, or a combination of both. Companies want to hire me based on my experience – which makes sense – but I want to change my career path and go after something I actually enjoy or look forward to.

“It’s such a waste. Many people end up in jobs they hate while they could excel in other things given the chance. I feel so much unleashed potential in me that’s waiting to see the light. I only wish to find someone who’ll believe in me and see more to me. Any ideas?”

Charlotte Avery

Dear Charlotte,

I agree with you. It’s a shame when people settle for jobs they don’t like. There is no reason for it. It’s a great big world out there. There are thousands of professions to pursue. You don’t want to spend your life doing something simply because you have a talent for it. Talents don’t work that way anyway. If you have been good at sales but hate selling, it’s probably because you are diligent and persistent and able to learn what you need to be successful. These are traits that will allow you to be successful in any career.

Twenty-nine is young. I didn’t “find” my career until I was about your age. Before that, I did some selling too (aluminum siding and pots and pans). And I hated it, just like you do. But I learned something. And what I learned helped me when I found a career that was right for me. 

Selling taught me the following valuable lessons:

• Every valuable human activity involves the buying and selling of ideas.

• Those things we think are valuable – from saving rain forests to Gucci shoes – are the result of ideas we have “bought” at one time or another.

• Except for the provision of very basic human needs, most of human culture is about this interchange of money and ideas.

What I’m saying, Charlotte, is that you can’t escape selling if you want to be successful. Even Michael Jordan and Tiger Woods, two of the most talented athletes of all time, earn their livings by selling ideas. (In their cases, they sell the idea that their endorsements are worth millions of dollars.)

So don’t be down on selling. Be happy that you know how to do it. Just apply what you know to selling ideas that you like – ideas that inspire you. 

The first thing you have to do is realize that you are very young and the world is your oyster. The second thing you must do is choose an industry whose ideas inspire you. Figure out what ideas turn you on. Then identify the industry that sells those ideas. Third, you should learn about that industry. You should get an entry-level job, if necessary, and spend all your spare time studying how that business works. Use your knowledge of selling to understand how that business sells the ideas that it sells. Become an expert in the selling of those ideas. Then you will be able to get pretty much any job you want.

If you want more details on how to get the job of your dreams, buy a copy of Automatic Wealth for Grads… and Anyone Else Just Starting Out and study Chapters 3, 4, and 5.

And start today, Charlotte. Not tomorrow. You said you wanted someone who believed in you. I believe in you. If you start today, then you will prove to me that you believe in yourself. So do it!

- Michael Masterson
[Ed. Note: All the money in the world can't make up for working at a job you don't enjoy. Fortunately, it's easy to do exactly what you want to do. Start your own Internet business! For dozens of insider secrets about how to start and grow a business, come to ETR's 2008 Info Marketing Bootcamp. Our panel of experts will be revealing the $100,000 strategies that have helped them make a combined $1 billion in revenues. Reserve your seat today.]

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In the sixties, there was a black and white TV show about a talking horse. Recently, a friend told me she read that the horse – Mr. Ed – was really played by a zebra.

I told my friend it couldn’t possibly be true. I pointed out to her that unless they covered the horse in makeup, the stripes would still show up on black and white TV.

Her reply: “But I read it on Snopes, so it must be true!”

Uh-oh.

I love Snopes as much as the next person, but I recognize a dangerous statement when I hear one. If you don’t know, Snopes.com is a site that debunks myths and popular legends. Because of its stance as a truth-seeking resource, it is fact-based and considered trustworthy.

I thanked my friend for the call, and said I’d get back to her later. I had to get online and see for myself.

At the Snopes site, I found the “Mr. Ed was a zebra” story under “Popular Myths.” As I read it, I started to get a cold chill. Had Snopes been untrustworthy all along? Because this story was definitely bogus.

At the end of the story, there was a link to “Additional Information About This Page.” And there I got a big surprise … and breathed a sigh of relief.

It seems Snopes published an entire section of false stories to prove a point. They all link to an article explaining the False Power of Authority. In other words, just because Snopes is a “trusted” news source, you still shouldn’t blindly trust the information they provide. You should always be thinking critically. And that goes for everything you hear or read in the media.

As Michael Masterson says: “When the rational answers are in, you must compare them to your gut instinct.”

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