Everyone’s done it. Missed that big meeting. Didn’t finish that proposal on time. Forgot that interview (or anniversary). Whatever it was, you screwed up – and you know it.
So how do you deal with the fallout?
Here are six steps to follow:
1. Be proactive. If you realize you screwed up before your boss/friend/spouse/whoever does, tell them about it as soon as possible. Ignoring it can be taken as either being too chicken to fess up or, even worse, not caring.
2. Admit your fault. Communicate clearly that you know what you did, and that you understand the repercussions of your error. People want to feel that you understand why they’re mad – that you’re not just trying to get out of trouble.
3. Be extra hard on yourself. If they see that you’re really sorry, they won’t have to play the bad guy – and may even try to console you. That will help strengthen your relationship.
4. Promise that it won’t happen again. If appropriate, offer up a plan that you intend to follow. Sometimes they’ll want to hear it, sometimes not. Either way, they’ll know you’ve put some thought into it.
5. Accept the consequences. Maybe you get yelled at. Maybe you get fired. Maybe you end up sleeping on the couch. Whatever it is, accept it without objection. If you really think your punishment was too harsh, address it later when cooler heads will prevail.
6. Go the extra mile. Don’t only correct your mistake, go one better. If you were late for a meeting, start being the first one there. If your work was shoddy, make sure it’s flawless and done ahead of schedule in the future.
Everyone screws up. As long as you don’t make it a regular habit, people will forgive you, especially when you handle it well. Of course, the best advice for dealing with mistakes is this: Don’t make them in the first place.
[Ed. Note: Brendan Florez is founder and CEO of Social Charm, LLC (www.SocialCharm.net), a company that uses analytical methods to understand and train people in the science of human interaction. Brendan graduated from Princeton University with a degree in electrical engineering, focusing on integrating engineering, neuroscience, and psychology.]
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